Short Comedy Quotes

“Do you know why people call me the devil? It’s because I live up to that name,” he chuckled and tightened his hand around my neck, making my pulse race. “I've shed a lot of blood, and killing someone as insignificant as you… It means nothing." “Then why haven’t you?” I dared to ask. I shouldn't test his patience, but the thrill of danger was so… Tempting. “You fascinate me. It would be a shame to end someone as amusing as you too soon.” His lips almost brushed against mine, stealing my breathe. "One month. Escape with Clara within one month, and it would seem like you never met me." “And if I fail?” “I’ll kill you. ~~~ When Gwendolyn Harper and her best friend are kidnapped by Lorenzo Raimondo, the ruthless, cunning mafia lord of Sinclair City, she's faces an impossible choice: save herself and abandon her best friend or risk everything to save them both. She chooses defiance, striking a dangerous deal for their freedom. But Gwen may have underestimated how much power Lorenzo had and the seductive, dangerous charm that she couldn't resist. Will she fight for a freedom that seems nearly impossible, or will she succumb to the temptation of the man who holds her life?

Pauwi na sana sina Jenyfer Caluttong sa bahay nila para sana mag-celebrate ng katatapos na graduation ng kapatid niya, nang bigla na lang harangin ang sinasakyan nila at sapilitan sila tinangay ng mga armado lalaki. Pagdating nila sa malaking bahay na pinagdalhan sa kanila. Doon lumabas ang tinatawag na boss ng mga armadong dumukot sa kanila. Sobrang gulat ni Jenyfer dahil ito ang lalaking may tama ng bala sa tagiliran na humingi ng tulong sa kaniya. Nagpakilala itong si Rhys Zhumalde. Mala-model sana ang ka-guwapuhan at umiigting din ang panga sa sobrang seryoso nito at sa tuwing tumititig sa kaniya ay tila may panganib na dala ang mata nito. Pakakawalan lang daw pamilya niya sa isang kondisyon. Magpapakasal siya rito. Labis ang galit ni Jenyfer nang marinig niya iyon kay Rhys Zumalde. Ngunit wala siyang choice kahit na ang tingin niya ay mapanganib ang magpakasal dito. “As long as you fulfill our deal to release my family, I'm willing to marry you even though it's dangerous to be your wife,”—Jenyfer Callutong.

Livia dan Raka saling membenci sejak awal. Bagi Livia, Raka adalah pria yang membunuh ayahnya. Sedangkan bagi Raka, Livia hanyalah kelemahan berbahaya yang bisa menghancurkan kekuasaannya. Namun takdir memaksa mereka berada di bawah atap yang sama, bukan sebagai pasangan, melainkan sebagai tawanan dan pemilik. Tujuan hidup mereka berlawanan. Livia ingin bertahan hidup sambil menunggu kesempatan membalas dendam. Sementara Raka ingin menjaga Livia tetap hidup demi rahasia besar yang ia bawa, sekaligus menjadikannya umpan untuk musuh-musuhnya. Karena ancaman dari dunia luar, Raka menetapkan satu keputusan mutlak bahwa Livia harus tinggal di bawah perlindungannya selama waktu tertentu, mengikuti semua aturannya, dan tidak pernah keluar dari jangkauan pengawasannya. Selama hidup bersama, konflik tak terhindarkan. Pertengkaran, kebencian, dan ketegangan terus terjadi. Namun di balik itu, Livia mulai melihat sisi Raka yang tidak ia duga, berupa perlindungan tanpa pamrih, kemarahan yang muncul karena takut kehilangan, dan kesetiaan mematikan pada orang yang ia anggap miliknya. Tanpa disadari, kebencian mereka mulai goyah. Kehadiran satu sama lain menjadi candu yang berbahaya. Livia membenci dirinya sendiri karena merasa aman di sisi musuhnya, sementara Raka kehilangan kendali karena mulai mencintai wanita yang seharusnya hanya ia manfaatkan. Ketika kebenaran tentang kematian ayah Livia terungkap, perjanjian perlindungan itu harus berakhir. Livia diberi pilihan untuk pergi dan bebas. Raka dipaksa melepaskan satu-satunya hal yang mampu meluluhkan hatinya. Namun saat mereka berpisah dan menjalani hidup masing-masing, satu hal menjadi jelas, bahwa Dunia tanpa satu sama lain terasa jauh lebih kejam. Di tengah perang terakhir dan ancaman kematian, mereka memilih untuk saling mengejar... bukan sebagai musuh, bukan sebagai pemilik dan tawanan, melainkan sebagai dua orang yang memilih untuk tetap bersama, meski dunia menentang. Karena bagi mereka, cinta yang lahir dari kebencian mungkin berbahaya, akan tetapi kehilangannya jauh lebih mematikan.

"I won’t say it twice you’re mine, or you die like the rest of your family." *************** He killed her brother. Erased her name from the legacy she once called home. Now, he claims her like a prize. Isabella Russo never wanted a part in her family’s brutal empire. She escaped the bloodshed and betrayal, choosing a quiet life free from the shadows of the mafia. But her past catches up to her in the form of Damian Vercetti—the man who reduced her world to ash. He says her brother betrayed him. That her family deserved what came. Now they’re gone... and Isabella is the last Russo left. To Damian, she’s leverage. A pawn. A possession. To Isabella, he’s the monster from her nightmares and the boy she once trusted. But when vengeance collides with obsession, and hate begins to twist into something darker, Isabella is forced to face the man who destroyed her life… and decide if she can survive him—or if part of her doesn’t want to. Power. Pain. Passion. In a world built on blood, love might be the deadliest sin of all.

“You can play Priest for as long as you like,” he spat, ignoring my protests, “but you will never find salvation.” His words struck like a curse, but that wasn’t the reason my chest heaved, goosebumps littered my skin, and definitely not the reason I felt hot despite the chilling dip from the lake. Ezreal’s eyes widened momentarily, noticing. I winced as his hand shifted, pressing against the stiff betrayal straining against my soaked robes. He stilled for only a second, then a wicked grin overtook his features. “Well, well,” Ezreal drawled, his voice taunting “Look who’s getting excited,” “Stop,” I gasped, squeezing my eyes shut as the humiliation dug deep. “Please….” He leaned forward, his breath hot as his lips ghosted over the shell of my ear. “I will taint you so bad,” he whispered, his hand tightening against my crotch. “So bad you won’t have the courage to stand on the altar you abandoned me for.” ****** At sixteen, Ezreal Vossell took the fall for a murder to protect the only boy he ever loved—Baron Lander, the timid son of the town’s high priest. A known delinquent, the bastard child of the mayor, but the only one who saw him for his true self was Baron. Ezreal made the ultimate sacrifice, and all he wanted in return was Baron’s support. But alas, on the day of the trial, Baron betrayed him, casting him aside to please his father. Ezreal was sentenced to life in prison, his heart shattered beyond repair. Fifteen years later, he was released, but gone was the naive sixteen-year-old. He’s returned as the ruthless leader of a mafia syndicate, and with all the power and wealth at his fingertips, he yearned for one thing alone. Revenge.

“You’ve come to kill me detective?” He whispered against her skin as he gently grasped her arm and turned her to him. Jude swallowed a gulp and looked up at him. His eyes were a cobalt shade of blue behind the mask, daring, cold and terrifying. “And you’ve come to me to be killed?” She replied in a hushed tone, gathering a lot of nerve and taking a step closer to him. Detective Jude Laurent should arrest Cassien, the deadly Maestro who now controls The Black Rose syndicate. Instead, she finds herself drawn into a dangerous game of cat and mouse, risking everything to uncover the truth about the organization that has haunted her since childhood. The same organization she believes holds the answers to her parents’ death in what everyone called a tragic house fire. But Jude has no idea she’s been walking straight into a trap years in the making. The real mastermind behind The Black Rose has been watching her every move, orchestrating her pain from the shadows. Someone who shaped her into the perfect weapon for revenge. And they’ve been waiting for this moment since the night her world burned. Now, as Jude hunts the man who’s becoming her obsession, and Cassien finds himself equally captivated by the detective who should be his enemy, neither realizes they’re both pawns in a much deadlier game. Because the person who destroyed Jude’s world isn’t the criminal she’s chasing. It’s someone far closer than she could ever imagine. And their final move is about to destroy everything she’s ever believed about her past, her purpose, and the man she can’t stop wanting. Some obsessions are worth dying for. Others are designed to kill you.

When Alina’s parents announced that their business was bankrupt, akala niya tapos na ang mundo niya. She thought there was no way out, no hope for her family—until Adamon Salvatore walked into their house. The youngest billionaire in the country, kilalang cold-hearted at mysterious, made them an offer they couldn’t refuse: he will save their company, pero kailangan siyang pakasalan ni Alina. Out of desperation and love for her parents, Alina said yes. The marriage made headlines. Their business was saved. Everyone thought she was living her perfect life—luxury, power, and a handsome husband beside her. But behind that glamorous world was a truth darker than anything she imagined. Adamon is not just a billionaire. He is a mafia king. Ang akala ni Alina kaya niyang tiisin ang bagong buhay, until she discovered secrets that could destroy her. She tried to escape—pero hinabol siya ni Adamon para ibalik, ngunit may mga tao ring gustong humabol sa kanya nang malamang siya ang asawa nito. Worse, habang lumalayo siya, mas lalo siyang nahuhulog sa lalaking dapat niyang katakutan. Saan siya tatakbo, if her heart screams that her home is in Adamon’s arm yet she is afraid of his world.

Trigger Warning ⚠️ ‼️ This book contains explicit sexual content, feral dominance, psychological obsession, sadistic control, graphic violence, degradation, and a brutal breeding kink. For mature readers only. Read at your own risk…or give in to the madness. She was just coming off a night shift. Scrubs still on. Exhausted. Bone-deep tired from another fourteen hours in the ER. She wanted food. A hot shower. Silence. What she got was blood. And him. Isadora Bell, twenty..three, top of her med school class and two years into her residency, made one mistake..she took the alley behind the hospital after her shift to avoid the rain. There, under flickering streetlights and the shadow of a gun, she watched a man get executed at close range. And the monster holding the gun? Dominic. Valenzo Head of the Valenzo crime family. Cold. Untouchable. Ruthless. He kills without flinching and fucks like it’s war. No one sees him and lives. No one touches him and breathes. But something about her made him stop. She should’ve screamed. Begged. Run. She just stared. He saw it in her eyes..curiosity. Fear. Heat. So he made a decision. “You’re mine now, little doctor. And the only thing you’ll be saving… is your breath when I’m done with you.” Now she’s trapped in a world of blood, diamonds, and depravity. Torn between what’s right and the man who ruins her every time. Because Dominic doesn’t make love. He claims. He destroys. He fucks until you forget who you were. And every time she swears she’s done, He makes her beg. This isn’t a love story. This is obsession. This is power. This is the kind of dark you don’t come back from.

When those you trust betray you, trading your freedom to settle their debts, you’re thrust into a world you never imagined. That’s how I found myself entangled with Damian—a man whose life is steeped in authority, peril, and hidden truths. As I navigate this unchosen path, I sense layers of my fate yet to be unveiled. The deeper I delve, the clearer it becomes: control is slipping through my fingers. And Damian? He is far more formidable than I ever anticipated… But is he truly my adversary, or could he be something else entirely?

As the neglected illegitimate child and sacrifice of my family. I had just survived an assassination attempt on my life when my father handed me to the Italian Mafia princess to marry. I was to act as the spy and report everything back to my father, it was my chance to finally make him proud and find out what happened to me. Except I didn’t anticipate NIKOLAI VIKTOROVITCH VOLKOV, the older uncle to my bride and my worst enemy, also the one person who my body betrays me to with the desire to be his. That’s when it dawned on me that I had married the wrong mafia heir.