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Snape Funny Novels & Stories
Here are 59 novels related to snape funny for you to read online. Generally, snape funny or similar novel stories can be found in various book genres such as Mafia, Werewolf and Romance. Start your reading from Don't Mess With DRACO at GoodNovel!
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Don't Mess With DRACO
Draco's deathly aura when he entered the van indicated he was in one of his worst moods, which was very surprising considering he had been with the lady boss just a few moments ago.
Let's face it, Draco had finally been showing human emotions these past few weeks ever since he met Miss Jones. The man was previously like a robot who, apart from his deathly glares and his signature frigid scowl that always adorned his face, showed no emotion that could tell you what he was thinking or feeling inside.
103.7K viewsCompletedAdded to Library 144 Times as snape funny
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The New Luna
Max’s POV
I had one hell of a day. I was sore, but nothing that the sweet Minerva Jones cannot fix. She whipped me up something from her little portable drawer like bag of potions and dropped a few of it’s yellow content in my tea. She reminded me of professor Snape from my favorite sequel, Harry Potter. The only difference was, miss Minerva was a happy soul. Snape was grumpy.
9.431.5K viewsCompletedAdded to Library 630 Times as snape funny
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Bullied by Navy Triplet Stepbrothers
I passed the another container of the sap to Jack who was waiting on standby for this moment.
He popped it open and the mist turned in his direction at the sound of the pop. With super reflexes and silence, he moved away from the direction the dark wizard was flying to, shifted to the side and poured the sap on the mist.
We watched in wonder as the mist started to change in color, twisting as a snake who was in pain would. I snorted. The dark wizard was nothing but a snake after all. Suddenly, a scream erupted from the mist and it dissolved, evaporating finally till there was nothing left.
871.8K viewsCompletedAdded to Library 1.9K Times as snape funny
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The Moon Court
Storm snarked.
“Watch the tone pup.” A male voice boomed through the room.
“What are you doing here?” Selene snapped.
The male quirked an eyebrow at her, and she rolled her eyes at him. “I see the snarkyness runs in the family.” He smirked.
917.5K viewsCompletedAdded to Library 612 Times as snape funny
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Cinderella and the devilish priest
Loosing control, he threw the glass of champagne against the wall, smashing it angrily into a million pieces.
Frightened by the noise, Cinderella cried.
" Royalty_ "
" You seem to enjoy telling me lies, don't you? "
He snarled.
" Tiger and sniper! "
Two fat reptiles crawled out hungrily to the big devil. They crept onto his laps, wrapping in full their fat bodies around his tattooed arm.
Cinderella recognized the snakes.
It was Funfun and dundun.
3.5K viewsCompletedAdded to Library 116 Times as snape funny
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Warrior of the Way
"No rainbow or pot of gold. Also, I think he'd be wearing green, wouldn't he?"
"Leprechaun! Don't you go calling me no stinking leprechaun, you elven lackey. I'll zap you into next week, I will. Now put me down!"
"He is feisty," Rhychard said.
"And cute," Renny added. "Don't forget cute."
106.4K viewsCompletedAdded to Library 255 Times as snape funny
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The Transcendent Zombie System
said Lucas with a faint smile.
The few young ladies were stunned. The young lad before them looked like he was only a few years older than them; they were curious how he could be so arrogant while he was talking.
The Rank 7 gigantic snake with a tiger's tail stared at Lucas. Obviously, it could comprehend Lucas' comment. It could not tolerate Lucas comment that referred to it as just a tiny snake.
All of a sudden, the Rank 7 gigantic snake with a tiger's tail pounced on Lucas.
Lucas' shot out a golden aura attack with his eyes, and the Rank 7 gigantic snake with a tiger's tail immediately died on the spot.
9.5338.4K viewsCompletedAdded to Library 12.2K Times as snape funny
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There's No Turning Back
Theodore, being just as petty, had resorted to using their subordinates to exchange insults from a distance.
The subordinate glanced at Theodore's latest reply and hesitated before reading it aloud.
"Mr. Snapp said, 'Hehe, I'm a lapdog with an owner. I'd love for Elara to put a collar on me… maybe even a leash…'"
The room fell silent, and the subordinate shuddered. He couldn't believe Theodore Snapp was this shameless!
Harvey spat out his words with utter disdain. "Serving people with his looks… How absolutely pathetic!"
8.7137.1K viewsCompletedAdded to Library 4.1K Times as snape funny
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“Daddy, Will You Ever Love Me?”
Snake said, "Oh yeah and from where I was standing when you had her bent over backwards, she sure does have a pretty pussy. DAMN HOT ONE TOO!"
I smiled and said to snake, "I think any pussy you see, black, white, yellow or red would be pretty to you."
He acted like he was in thought for a moment before he responded with, "But I love your pussy the most Ms. Britt. Ain't no other girl can hold a candle to that piece of heaven you have between your legs."
Spike got the beer out of the refrigerator and I stirred the pot one more time and it was steaming all the way through, so I told the guys to have a seat. I put a hot plate on the table then sat the pot with a big spoon beside it.
1016.5K viewsOngoingAdded to Library 477 Times as snape funny
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HER MAFIA CEO
I pretend to think about his question placing my hand on my chin and looking up at the sky as I swirl around in my chair.
“I doubt, I’m not really a big fan of keeping the devil that close as a pet”
Harry seemed to find this very funny as he couldn’t stop laughing, I stared at him. Just laughing for a little before I joined in with a slight giggles. It was actually quite reliving.
“What’s so funny?”
106.3K viewsCompletedAdded to Library 138 Times as snape funny
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Frequently Asked Questions
Snape's humor is like a bitter dark roast coffee—acquired taste, but once you get it, it’s addictive. His sarcasm isn’t the slapstick kind; it’s dry, razor-sharp, and delivered with the enthusiasm of someone who’d rather be grading potions essays. Take his iconic 'Obviously' in 'Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban' when Hermione answers correctly—it’s not just funny because it’s sarcastic, but because it’s unnecessary. He’s the teacher who’d deduct points for breathing too loudly, and that absurdity makes his lines gold.
What elevates his quotes is Alan Rickman’s delivery. That pause before '...turn to page 394'? Pure comedy timing. Snape’s humor works because it’s rooted in his character—a perpetually annoyed genius who views everyone (especially Harry) as mildly intolerable. His insults are creative ('Baboon heart'), and his disdain is so over-the-top it loops back to being hilarious. It’s the kind of humor that makes you snort, then feel guilty for enjoying someone’s misery—which, ironically, is very Snape.
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