so dumb jokes

Spoiled but independent, Sereia Philomena Isolde can’t deny it. Kaya naman hindi sya papaawat kay Phoenix Mason Hill, heir to the successful Hill Corp, nang malamang nasa pangalan ng lalaki ang lupaing kanya dapat. So, all there’s left to do is come and “negotiate” him about the terms. She wants to change his mind, he wants to change her heart. Pataasan sila ng pride. Prepare to venture into a journey filled with mud, soil and fertilizer as they explore the beauty of nature in a simple life in the province area (with the simple life of the farmers in the Philippines). Awayan, bangayan, tampuhan, iyakan, at siyempre, pagmamahalan. ***Tagalog Version of Changing the Billionaire’s Heart and His Winter Heart

"Parang awa niyo na itigil niyo na to."- pagmamakaawa ng isang dalaga Ngunit wala man lang siyang ibang narinig kundi puro tawanan. Kitang kita niya sa mga mukha ng mga taong nasa harap niya ang mga ngisi sa kanilang mga labi. 'Kahit maubos pa ang boses mo kakasigaw Crystal walang makakarinig sayo dito hanggang sa mamatay ka."- nakangiting wika ng babae na nasa harapan niya. "Teka teka sandali! Sandali lang Yessie. Wala sa plano to."- pagpigil ng isa pang boses. Halos hindi na matingnan ni Crystal kung sino ito. 'And so? You think I care? She deserve it! Sge deserve to die!!."- puno ng kaseryosohan na saad ni Yessie. 'Sinusumpa ko maybabayad kayo! Pagbabayaran niyo ang ginawa niyong to. Hindi ko kayo papatahimikin!'- nakakakilabot na sigaw ng dalaga kahit na nahihirapan na ito. 'Talaga? Sa tingin mo mangyayari pa yun? Sa tingin mo magagawa mo pa yun? Hahaha! Huwag kang magpatawa! Ito na ang huling gabing masisilayan mo ang mundo. Paalam Crystal! Rest well darling.'- ngising sabi nito at walang ka abog abog na hinampas ng kahoy ang kamay dahilan para mapabitaw ito at malaglag. Halos hindi ako makahinga sa nakita. I'm so sorry! Paano nga ba matatapos lahat ng to kung hindi nila alam kung sino ang totoong kalaban? Buhay ang kinuha at buhay din ang magiging kapalit. Pinaglalaruan ng isang tinig! Boses na nakakapangilabot. Paulit ulit na naririnig at kapag narinig mo ito magtago kana, dahil ikaw na ang susunod. "Tagu-taguan maliwanag ang buwan, pagbilang ko ng tatlo nakatago na kayo. isa, dalawa, tatlo. Pag nahuli ko ay papatayin ko" Pag narinig mo ang katagang yan ay magtago kana. Run and hide as fast as you can. Save yourself before it's too late. Killer is here, death is everywhere. Be careful who you trust. Tik tak Tik tak...

"Knowing my real identity means DEATH." - Mafia Don Daven Verrano Costello **** Mahigit pitong taong naging consigliere ng Mafia Don sa bansang Italy si Daven Costello. Siya rin ang misteryosong CEO ng Philippines Bank Corporation (PBC) na may paid-in capital na 20 Billion Pesos. Nang mamatay ang boss ng kanilang mob ay nahirang siya bilang bagong pinuno. He's protective when it comes to his family's safety so he decided to keep it a secret. Ang akala ng marami ay isa lamang siyang hamak na secretary sa sarili niyang kompanya. Elera Luciano - ang nakamaskarang lider ng Asian Assasins at nagtatrabaho bilang General Manager sa PBC. Pinasok niya ang magulong mundo ng mafia para hanapin at pagbayarin ang taong pumaslang sa kaniyang tunay na ina. Dahil sa kalasingan, kalituhan at kapusukan, nagbunga ang isang gabing pinagsaluhan nina Daven at Elera. It was indeed a marriage before love set up dahil kapwa infatuation lang naman ang nararamdaman nila sa isa't isa bago pa may mangyari sa kanila. Nang magpakasal ang dalawa, naranasan ni Daven kung paano maliitin at ituring na parang basura ng kaniyang mga biyenan. Inalipusta, inapak-apakan at inalila. Maging si Elera ay itinuring na isang malaking kahihiyan ng kaniyang mga magulang. Hanggang isang araw, hindi na natiis ni Daven ang lahat. Nagimbal ang mundo ng angkan ng Luciano nang malaman nila ang tunay na katauhan ni Daven.

Meet Karmine, the girl who yearns happiness and security with the people she loves dearly but why is happiness so hard to come by? She had a past, a past she badly wanted to forget. A dark and horrid past that tormented her and gave her nightmares after nightmares even in her waking times. Then, she met Robert, a man whom she learned to love. It was all a deal, a contract, an agreement yet she fell deep, hard, and fast. From a pretend relationship turned into a full blown love affair. Both fell in love when they least expected it. Theirs was a right love at the wrong time. It’s been so long since the last time she let her anger and hatred take over her. It was a pretty bad sight, something she vowed to never let it consume her again. But, how could she when they won’t let her live free? Will she ever have her own happy ending?

Izaria Mauve is a sheltered woman and an only daughter of Asuncion family. She is the last heiress so she has to meet her clans expectations. Lumaki siya sa puder ng kanyang lolo na namamalagi sa Japan upang ilayo siya sa mga mata ng mga tao hanggat hindi pa dumadating ang tamang panahon upang siya naman ang mamahala sa malaki nilang kompanya. Bata pa lang kasi ay sakitin na ito. Everyone thought she was kept in a private hospital where no one is allowed to visit. But her grandfather raised her to be a warrior rather than a weak and clueless princess. She spent most of her time in a temple where she learned different types of martial arts and weapons, she was also taught everything about business. Ang inakala nilang musmos at mahina na dalaga ay hindi pala totoong mahina. Pero hindi roon magtatapos ang lahat dahil mababago ang kapalaran ni Izaria nang ipahayag ng kanyang lolo na kinakailangan niyang pakasalan ang isang makapangyarihang tao sa lipunan na nasa Pilipinas upang isalba ang kompanya nilang nasa bingit na ng pagbagsak. Izaria had a second thought but she was convinced to accept it after his grandfather died and was told that that is his last will. Anong klaseng buhay kaya ang naghihintay kay Izaria sa Pilipinas? Maging matagumpay kaya ang mga plano niya upang mabawi ang kompanya nila? Paano kung hindi lang ang pakikipagsapalaran na magpakasal sa taong hindi niya kilala ang problemang dumating sa buhay niya? Paano kung may matuklasan siya na hindi niya dapat malaman?

Van Dominic Loudd grew up without a family. He was young when he became an orphan and was raised by a family lawyer. He had always wanted to have a big, happy family. And he thought he would be able to achieve that when he met and fell in love with Demani Dominico. As opposed to Van, Demani was born in a big, close-knit family. Lumaki ito sa isang kilala at respetadong familia; believing that family should stick together through good and bad times. Just like all other couples out there, they met, fell in love, and planned for the future. Van eventually became part of the Dominico family. His life became complete. And so he thought... Dahil ang pamilya ni Demani rin pala ang dahilan kaya hindi naging maganda ang takbo ng pagsasama nila. They loved each other to destruction, but her family was pulling their relationship down. And Van got tired of it, and so, they started to fight a lot and lose respect for each other. They went through a bitter separation, and Demani thought she would never hear from him again. Until two years later, nakatanggap na lang ito ng sulat mula sa abogado ni Van, asking for her help. Van had an accident and he needed her assistance. She was skeptical at first, she didn't want to have any connections whatsoever with him; but she still found herself standing in front of their old house, waiting for him to open up the door. Will there be a second chance for them? **

Maxine is arguably the most bitter girl in town. Ever since her ex-boyfriend Leander left her, she has been rude to all men. It all started at a nightclub. Maxine was sad, sulking and drunk at the counter. She was still asking for many bottles of wine, but the bartender already refused her because she was already drunk. She was broken; she loves Leander so much, but he cheated on her. She thought he was the kindest man she'd ever known. Maxine couldn't even walk properly, she swayed and she almost fell. But the next moment she knew, she had already fallen to a man chest. And that was the time she met Law. The moment she looked up to see it. She saw her past. Her past that keeps hurting her till now. It was her last day here at the clubhouse and she promised herself that she would never come back here, but the pain of yesterday returned when she saw him. Leander and him look similar Law was a bit surprised when Maxine grabbed his white collar and kissed him aggressively. And that was the first and last encounter they had. Amari pulled her sister away from the unknown man. One year later. Maxine changed a lot, she was bitter and hot tempered as always. Maxine can't accept that her sister is getting married. She didn't want it to be like her who would only get hurt at the end. She was pissed, so she walked out of Amari's wedding venue with no one knowing. Destiny seems hilarious and playful. Law finally found her in the parking area. Maxine can't remember everything about him. But since that day, it seems destiny is really bringing them closer because Law Del Fierro is also her new Boss.

SIS (Social Issue Series) #1: Objectifying WomenOver protectiveness of boyfriends are often romanticized as cute and caring nowadays. To the point that some ladies fail to live their lives to the fullest just to satisfy their men's insecurities and the likes. Pero kung ikaw si Nayeli Reese P. Eusebio, you'll probably say that you've had enough of those kinds of bullshit. Nari had been deprived of a normal life for her 17 years of existence. She never had a chance to step out of the four corners of their house and experience what common people usually do due to unfortunate circumstances that involves her personal family issues. So when she had the opportunity to finally get out from that nightmare, she promised herself, and her brother that wishes her nothing but happiness, that she will bring out the best in her as she strives to achieve her goals.But when Colton Jace R. Octavio gets into the picture, Nari felt things that she never felt before. Unexplainable feelings that are enough to confuse and distract her from her goals. Colton's dream was just to grow old with her while Nari's was for them to grow individually together. When love gets in the way of your dreams, is it possible to grow with the flow?

Trystan Lerwin Wuizon is known for being a young, handsome billionaire and woman hater. Bata pa lang siya ay iniwan na siya ng kaniyang ina sa ama niya. He hated her because she chose her boyfriend over him. Si Ashanti Ruiz Salazar ay anak ng isang doktor at abogado. Ang gusto ng mga magulang niya ang maging isa siyang doktor, abogado o enhinyero. Pero ang gusto niya ay ang maging isang flight attendant. Hinayaan siya ng mga magulang niya dahil akala nila ay magbabago pa ang isip ni Ashanti. Butthey found out that Ashanti enrolled in a different school just to be a flight attendant. Due to disappointment, pinalayas nila ang anak at sinabing bahala na siyang buhayin ang sarili niya. Walang kaso ito kay Ashanti dahil matagal niya na itong pinagplanuhan. She had different part time jobs para madagdagan ang savings niya. So, she'll survive. Years after, she graduated and finally reached her dream. Her batch celebrated their success at a newly opened bar. It was the grand opening kaya discounted lahat. Pinaghalong saya at lungkot ang naramdaman ni Ashanti. Saya dahil natupad na ang pangarap niya at lungkot dahil hindi pa din siya kinakausap ng mga magulang niya. Uminom siya hanggang sa tuluyan na siyang malasing. Pagkagising niya kinabukasan ay wala siyang matandaan at nasa isang hindi pamilyar na kuwarto na siya habang nakahiga sa tabi ng isang lalaki nang walang kahit na isang saplot sa katawan. Dahil sa takot at kaba, agad na nagbihis si Ashanti at umalis. Hindi na siya nagpakita pa kahit kailan sa lalaking iyon. Lumipas ang ilang buwan ay nalaman niyang buntis siya at ang ama ay isang estranghero para sa kaniya! Magkikita pa kaya silang muli? O mananatili na lamang isang sikreto ang naging bunga ng isang mainit na gabing pinagsaluhan nila?

Samantha Gomez is a well-known Doctor at Sebastian Hospital in the Philippines, one day she got drunk because her boyfriend didn't go to their meeting place, so she immediately went to his condo and she didn't think she would see that her boyfriend, was having sex with another woman. So she got drunk and she met a man at the bar and because of their drunkenness, she immediately invited to get married and turns out this man is a Billionaire and Owner of their workplace. What do you think Samantha will do? Get a divorce and re-sign to her job? or she will continue to be Mrs. Sebastian.?