your momma so dumb jokes

“I killed his secret lover.” “Does he know?” “Yes, but he pretends not to know it in front of me.” A gun shot sounded outside the mansion and Alvah didn't bother to check. “What is going on?” Alvah chuckled, a smile spread across her face, “My husband. He's here to kill me.”

The CEO of the biggest mall in the Philippines and heir to a billion dollar company marries a housekeeper's daughter. Sunny's back in Buencamino to take care of her sick mother and to rekindle her old love only to find out that her ex-boyfriend already married someone else. Heartbroken, she

Demi menghilangkan kegelisahan sang ibu, Selena Brawijaya, gadis berusia 24 tahun yang merupakan seorang novelis, akhirnya menikah dengan seorang lelaki asing yang sama sekali tak dikenalnya. Lelaki berparas menawan yang memiliki karir gemilang sebagai seorang tentara. Yang sayangnya, ia memiliki trauma mendalam yang telah mengakar kuat dalam dirinya. Janji suci di depan penghulu pun seakan hanyalah ritual belaka, layaknya cangkang kosong tanpa isi. Lantas, apa yang akan dilakukan Selena dengan status ikatan suami-istri yang mereka miliki di saat ia memiliki keyakinan kuat bahwa apa pun yang terjadi dalam hidupnya bukanlah suatu kebetulan? Tak butuh waktu ribuan tahun bersama untuk menyadarinya. Karena di detik yang sama saat ia tahu dirinya tak lagi mampu menolak takdir yang telah ditetapkan untuk dirinya itu, ide cemerlang langsung muncul di benaknya. Sebagai seorang novelis yang telah memiliki ratusan juta pembaca di seluruh dunia, tentu ia tidak akan mau dirugikan baik secara mental maupun fisik karena pernikahan yang sama sekali tak ia inginkan ini. Dan menikah dengan seorang tentara yang kehidupannya syarat akan kedisiplinan dan kerja keras, mengangkat senjata menantang maut, bergerilya di rimbunnya hutan belantara bersantap ular, tentu akan memberinya gambaran utuh yang tak semua orang mengetahuinya. Ini adalah harta karun. Ide itulah yang membuatnya tak lagi menyuarakan protes tentang perjodohan mereka, alih-alih, gadis itu justru mengangguk mantap tanpa sedikit pun keraguan. Apa yang ia khawatirkan dengan pernikahan yang memiliki berlembar-lembar poin kesepakatan? Terlebih lagi, kesepakatan tentang tak akan saling menyentuh tanpa persetujuan. Dan dari yang ia lihat dari sosok menawan Arjuna, lelaki itu adalah lelaki sejati yang tak akan pernah melanggar janji yang telah disepakati. Di sisi lain, Arjuna sama sekali tak menyadari tentang akal bulus calon istrinya itu. Ia sama sekali tak pernah berpikir jika gadis bar-bar itu akan dengan begitu riang gembira mengikutinya ketika tengah menjalankan sebuah misi rahasia, dan tentu saja, tanpa sepengetahuannya.

Don’t trust anyone, not even yourself….You think you know someone pretty well, until you’re awoken in the middle of the night to the sound of unfamiliar voices and realize your sister’s being swept away by some supernatural creatures who climb in and out of windows and leap from two-story houses like it’s nothing.My parents tried to tell me everything was fine, but when Cadence finally did come back from wherever they’d taken her, I knew there was something unusual about my older sister.Now, her best friend is dead.Her ex-boyfriend is acting bizarre.And I’m afraid I might be next.My name is Cassidy Findley, and I’m pretty sure my sister is a vampire, despite her “co-worker” making every effort to brainwash me into believing otherwise. With the help of my two best friends, we vow to get to the bottom of this before it’s too late, and my sister starts to claim other victims. I love her, but I won’t be turned, nor will I just sit by without doing everything I can to stop her. I can only hope that I’m not too late and that I can trust my own memories.Because I’m pretty sure my sister’s friends are coming for me next.The Chronicles of Cassidy is a retelling of The Clandestine Saga specifically for young adult/teen readers told from the perspective of high schooler Cassidy Findley.

"Hey mister, can I ask you for a favor?" A lady asked with her sweet and intoxicating voice, causing the man who was walking, to turn around and stare at the young lady. "Can you be my boyfriend for just one month, and I promise to pay you handsomely." Cecelia said smiling. **** Cecelia is an upcoming actress. Her parents had threatened to choose a suitor for her if she didn't hasten her steps and find one for herself... Edward is a founder of Charles diamond company who agreed to be Cecelia's fake boyfriend for a month not because he feels like, but because his parents were also planning on looking for a lady for him. Edward has had a traumatic experience during his childhood, which causes him to shut his mouth, as he goes through different attacks, unaware that it would lead to him being unable to talk. When their plans start to unravel will Cecelia fall in with her parents' plans? When feelings get involved will things still work out as they planned?

A drunk Eliza Harper ended up having a one-night stand with Benjamin Clayton, a powerful billionaire, after getting cheated on by her boyfriend on their one-year anniversary. The two thought that they were meant for each other until Shannon, Benjamin’s feisty ex-wife brews up a storm between the two. Will Eliza and Benjamin survive love’s hardships? ---------------------------------- “Mommy, how come I don’t have a daddy like the other kids?” Eleanor questioned her mother with her glistening bug eyes. Her mother stopped her work and stared at her lonesome daughter. Tears flowed down her face like a stream as she took her daughter in her arms. She didn’t know how to answer such a difficult question....

After a brutal, heart wrenching family split, Tiana Williams began to unveil life as parent's divorce pushed her into the limelight in a school where she was socially inexistent. Nothing is warmer than the bad boy with a sweet heart caring for the quite nerd. Her new phase of life cracks a wall for Blake Anthony to creep in. She felt getting high over everything as she thought she lost it all, not knowing she just started. A young teenager with low knowledge of life starts analysing and making life decisions recklessly. It didn't go well, it wasn't so nice, it was more than a disaster. Little did she know that she had many things left from her first loss. So Nice#ProjectNigeria

Hindi akalain ni Mutya na magagawa nga talaga nyang pikutin ang among si Drake ngunit ngayon ay bigla na lang nabahag ang kanyang buntot at ayaw na niyang ituloy ang binabalak. Kailangan niyang makaalis ng kwarto bago pa magising si Drake. Dahan dahan niyang pinihit ang seradura ng pinto upang hindi sya makagawa ng ingay. Laking gulat na lamang nya dahil hindi pa man nya tuluyang nabubuksan ang pintuan ay may tumulak na nito mula sa labas kasunod ang maraming kislap at tunog ng camera. “Miss ikaw ba ang bagong girlfriend ni Drake Rufino?” “Nasa loob ba sya?” “Gano na kayo katagal?” Sunod sunod na katungan ng mga reporters. Sa takot ay napaurong sya. Hindi nya alam ang gagawin. Napatigil ang dalaga sa pag-urong nang bumangga sya sa matitipunong dibdib mula sa lalaking nakatayo sa kanyang likuran. Gising na si Drake. “Whats going on here?” halata sa mukha ng lalaki na bagong gising pa ito. Nakapulupot sa hubo't hubad nitong katawan ang puting kumot....

Si Liam at Lara, boss and employee in the same company na hindi nila kilala ang isa't-isa. Sa gabi ng kaarawan ni Liam ay binigyan siya ng kanyang mga kaibigan ng makakasama buong gabi ngunit sa hindi inaasahang pagkakataon, si Lara ang nadala sa kanya dahil lang sa isang pagkakamali. Lara got pregnant broke up by her boyfriend, pinalayas din siya ng pamilyang umampon sa kanya at walang mapuntahan. Liam was shocked nang makitang empleyado niya pala ang babaeng naka-one night stand niya at buntis ito. Hindi niya gustong tumakbo pero natatakot siyang ipagtapat dito kung sino siya.

Party-goer si Karisma. Isang gabi nang may magtangkang masama sa kanya ay iniligtas siya ng isang lalaki na nandoon, si Tobias Ortega. Nang malaman ng kanyang ina ang nangyari ay inutusan siya nitong pilitin ang binata na pumayag para maging personal bodyguard niya, kung hindi ay hindi na siya papayagan pang dumalo sa mga parties. Ngunit ayaw ni Tobias, kaya’t nagpasya si Karisma na pilitin ito at ligawan. Mapapapayag niya kaya ito?