You Re So Dumb Jokes Novels & Stories

I finally managed to pull the remote away from him. "Hey give that back!"He groaned and i laughed at his expense, possessively gripping the remote. "No i won't!"I squeaked. "Come on Olivia, you're being ridiculous, let's watch at eternity's gate,it can help you grow some sense" Did he just insult me? "Did you just say that I'm senseless?"I glared at him. "Of course, whoever told you that you're reasonable lied to you. Hard". "And you're dumb, you're very dumb,in fact your a double IQ dummy and you'll always be!"I yelled.

He made me laugh, a genuine, bubbling sound that felt good after the fear. “Your turn,” he challenged, when he finished. “Tell me a joke. Something to keep the darkness at bay.” I thought for a moment. “Okay, okay… What do you call a fake noodle?” He raised an eyebrow, a slight smile playing on his lips. “What?” “An impasta!” I delivered the punchline with a flourish, and he actually laughed, a deep, booming sound that warmed the room. “Alright, alright, that was a good one, for a rookie,” he teased. “My turn. Why did the scarecrow win an award?”

The front doors swooshed open and were slammed shut, followed by loud thuds which were supposed to be footsteps, coming closer towards the dining room. "There's the missing child." Smartass began and spoke like a, well, smart ass. How is my intuition always right? What am I saying? I'm smart as fuck. That's why. Stop lying to yourself babes. You like to think you're smart. You're street smart. But you're a complete dumbass. Don't get it twisted. I hate my mind.

They really were amused by my words. “Are you stupid?” One of them said between laughs, shaking his head as though I had just told the most absurd joke imaginable, “Do you even understand what you are saying? We were hoping you would defend yourself by saying something normal, but this is the best you could come up with?”

"All this talk just means you can't afford to pay me the two thousand dollars, right? I'll make you an offer. "If you take off every last piece of counterfeit junk you're wearing and admit in front of everyone that you're nothing but a gold-digging, wannabe socialite who's only after money, I'll be magnanimous enough to let you leave. You won't even have to pay the two thousand dollars in damages."

Heavy with shit we weren’t saying. I cleared my throat. “Alright. That’s enough depressing hospital talk. You know what would really make my day better?” He glanced at me, brows raised. “A really dumb joke.” Andrew blinked. Then tilted his head a little, lips twitching like he was fighting a smile. “A dumb joke?” I nodded, lips curving around the cigarette still hanging from my mouth. “Come on. Hit me.” He gave me a look—half skeptical, half amused. “Fine. What do you call a sad strawberry?”

"You are not dumb, are you?" This question made me feel humiliated, but against them, I couldn't even gather the courage to breathe loudly.

I tell her, pretending to be surprised. “What” she shrieks out. “To tell you honestly, since it seems like you people love fights, I have class like in the next five minutes, but I will say this” I start, cleaning my hand with the soviet paper. “You Vicki, you look like a dumb person, I don’t care whether that is true or not, you Minnie Moe look like you’re even dumber, and you see you, what’s your name again, you look like the dumbest person to every exist, and from what you’ve been spouting since, maybe you are” I tell them, pointing to each of them as I mention their name

My smile widened as I mindlessly took off my jacket setting it down on the leather seat. I clung to Dalton chatting with him as Enzo thought it was the time for the like of the day as he called it. It was one of those stupid habits that we had going on as kids and it kinda stuck with us and Enzo was the one with the shittiest and corniest jokes. I braced myself to hear one of his dad jokes, Dalton was holding in his laugh at the eager look on his brother's face already. "What do you call a joke without a punchline?"

I can't believe that someone could utter such a dumb and stupid statement. "I never knew you are this dumb. How do you expect me to tell my family such blatant lies that hold no water? Do you think my family members are fools? Do you think they don't know me well enough to know the things I can do or not? Now listen carefully Mr. Dumb Head, my family knows what I am capable of doing, and sleeping with a stranger and getting impregnated by him is not one of them. I will never tell my family such blatant lies!" I fumed in anger.