Summer Quotes Funny

After five years of marriage, my husband, Abel Brooks goes on a business trip that lasts half a year. When he returns, he brings his first love, Cora Garrett, back. She's already three months pregnant. Abel says that life is tough for her and wants her to move in with us temporarily. I object, and he tells me to know my place. His tone is scornful—it seems he's forgotten that the villa we live in was one of my wedding gifts. He and his family have leeched off me all this while. This time, I'm going to stop providing for them. I smile and call my assistant. "Draft a divorce agreement for me now. To think a live-in son-in-law would have the nerve to bring his mistress home like this."

Nasa palengke ako ng may matandang babae na hindi ko kilala ang humawak sa kamay ko ng mahigpit. Agad ko na pinrotektahan ang baby bump ko, pero sinabi niya, “May naglagay ng swap spell sa iyo. Malapit na ilipat ang patay na bata sa katawan mo.” Sa tingin ko sinungaling siya, pero sinabi niya, “Bilisan mo at subukan pasukahin ang sarili mo. Dapat mo subukan isuka ang isdang kinain mo hanggang sa kaya mo.”

In my previous life, my husband's female coworker had asked him to drive her to and from work. I wasn't happy about that, but my husband dismissed my concerns, saying, "We live in the same neighborhood, so it's not like I'm going out of my way. Don't be so selfish." Six months later, she became pregnant and tragically miscarried in our car. The doctor was baffled, saying, "How could she have intercourse in the early stages of pregnancy?" Intercourse? I was confused, as her husband was overseas on a business trip. Before I could fully process the situation, both my husband and his female coworker pointed their fingers at me and claimed that I was the driver during the incident. Because of that, when her husband rushed back from abroad, he stabbed me over twenty times in a fit of rage. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself back on the day before he first gave her a ride.

As the holiday began, I encountered an exhilarating affair. One day, on a double-decker tour bus, I found myself locked in a passionate moment with a beautiful woman on the upper deck, all while my official girlfriend was napping on the lower level. The woman gently placed her soft hand on my upper body, murmuring sweetly, “See you tonight, love…” And just like that, I was completely captivated.

Liam Chase and I were legendary in Celandre City—the most infamous enemies ever bound by marriage. He hated me for being shameless, convinced I'd schemed my way into becoming his wife. I despised him for playing the celibate knight for Alexa Conley and treating me coldly. In eight years of marriage, his most frequent words to me were, "Get out." Then the flood came. The man who'd never spared me a single kindness shoved me onto the last lifeboat. Over the roaring water, he shouted, "Don't look back! Go! Khloe, my debt to you is paid. In the next life, I belong only to Alexa." I lunged for him, but someone wrenched me back. I could only watch as the water swallowed Liam whole. When rescue teams finally came, they found his body bloated, his fingers locked around Alexa's pendant in a grip no one could break. Afterward, I sold everything we owned, donated it all to the disaster relief, and jumped off a building. But when I opened my eyes, I was back… on the night Liam got drugged.

On my husband's birthday, I ask him for 100 dollars for groceries. Yet he ends up transferring 100 thousand dollars to me, saying that it's "to buy Shannon a bag". A moment later, he bombards me with texts, saying that he transferred the money wrongly and that he wants me to return it to him. "Hello? Why aren't you giving me back the money? Give it back to me, you shameless woman!" Just then, Shannon Lambert updates her social media. "It's his birthday, but he's given me a huge diamond ring. It's so weird, but I love it!" Only then do I realize he's been pretending to be poor all these years. He's spent all his money on Shannon, a student he's been sponsoring. I refuse to transfer the money back to him. Instead, I reply, "I'll give you back half of it once we're divorced."

I'm one of the entertainment industry's most popular celebrities. One day, the Holmes family, the richest family in Hemmingville, comes to me and tells me I'm one of them. The day I return home, the city's paparazzi follow me to capture every second of my return. When I arrive at the Holmes residence, my adoptive sister stops me from entering. "We've looked into you and found out that you shot to fame after starring in an adult film. "The Holmes family has its rules—you have to change your clothes in public before you can step foot in here. Dad said that I'm the one who calls the shots when he and Jason aren't at home, so I hope you can understand me." In my past life, I would've acted cautiously and adopted a lowly stance for the sake of my image. But I've been reborn. I kick aside the things in my way and shove Nancy Holmes aside. "How ridiculous! You'd better stop and think whether you're worthy of telling me what to do. How dare you ask me to strip in public? "I'm insured from head to toe—you can't afford to pay me back if you even touch a hair on my head! And you call yourself the heiress of the family, huh? I'd like to see you grovel at my feet and beg me later!"

I'm a pet whisperer. During a live stream, a man asks me to help check on his dog. "My precious keeps sniffing me these days. Can you see what's up with it?" I smile and say, "Your dog's just expressing its love for you." After ending the live stream, I immediately call the police. "I want to report a case of body dismemberment." The dog from earlier recently gnawed on a human bone!

Tally finds her fiancé in bed with another woman. She feels like her life is falling apart. At the work Christmas party, she drinks to much ending up in bed with her boss. Shock to the core but that doesn't compare to her astonishment when she man whore boss asks her to marry him. OMG the man who is her father's biggest rival wants to marry her.

Victoria Carson is 17 and in love with Bruce Wayne and Thera nothing that could make her happier. That is till a summer mistake threatens the he dreams and hopes for a brighter future. Could she ever be able to face Bruce? Or will she keep this a secret even if it's driving a wedge between her and her future? Bruce Wayne just couldn't be happier, finally coming home to his beautiful girlfriend, the love of his life. He is confused and hurt when she starts to ignore him, frustrated Bruce is set on finding the cause of her strange behavior. But is he ready for the truth? As it shakes the very foundation of their relationship, will they ever be able to get through this,or is their love doomed to fail?