Teks Stand Up Comedy Lucu Bikin Ngakak

Mama habis-habisan menentang hubunganku dengan Om Angga. Namun, karena aku terus memaksa bahkan hingga mengancam akan kabur dari rumah jika tidak juga direstui, orang tuaku akhirnya mengalah juga. Om Angga adalah duda tiga kali yang punya dua anak dari pernikahan pertamanya. Dia begitu tampan, bugar, juga mencintaiku--terlihat dari tatapannya. Namun, aku tidak menyangka ... usai malam pertama kami, dia justru mengemukakan keinginan yang membuatku sangat di luar nalar. Kenapa dia meminta hal yang mengorbankan diriku? Apa sebenarnya motif Om Angga menikahiku?

Twisting her hands backward, he took her till the walls. "You did'nt leave till now?" That man questions her as he leaned to her face. "Mmm...... Mmmmm....... Please leave my hand...... Leave it..." "I won't listen to you once today. I gave you once chance." He said coming close to her in a low and bossy tone. Anna smelled the strong smell of wine. It was obvious that he was more drunk than Anna. She could strongly feel his warm breaths across her face. Her start started to beat more faster than before. "But see.... You came back to me.... Now even if you want to leave me, I won't let you leave me." Anna tried hard to leave from his grip but he pulled her towards him. He kept his lips on her lips. By this sudden kiss Anna's eyes widened. She did'nt expect something like this. That man started to kiss her wildly. She started to suffocate by his wild kiss. She tried to free herself from him but was unsuccessful. He stopped for a moment and then took her face in between his hands. Both were standing too close to each other, so close that they could hear each others heartbeat but due to the darkness in the room both were unable to see each other. "You wanted this, right? You wanted me to love you endlessly" "Yes..... Yes.... I.....wanted.... to..... but....." She was trembling as she spoke.

‘’Damn, they sent a perfect b***h,’’ he spoke while he loosen his tie. The Aphrodisiac was already taking a very strong effect on Daniel, the wholesome billionaire, and he couldn’t hold himself back anymore. ‘’You invited me with your open legs. I will make sure to satisfy you,’’ he spoke in his raspy seductive voice and climbed over her. Grabbing her exposed milky white leg, he started moving his hand upwards from her thigh, creasing her soft skin, giving goosebumps to her. She felt a tingling sensation she never felt before. His eyes locked on her blossom, which was rising and falling with her heavy breaths. He placed his lips on her neck, giving her a nice love bite, making her bite her lips to stop that shameful moan escaping her mouth.

Arielle scored the most lucrative deal of her career and decided to celebrate it with a two-week vacation touring another continent. In her plans to let loose for the first time in her life, she has a one-night stand with a fellow tourist. The next day she left him with a simple goodbye note thinking they would never see each other again. __ Thomas finally managed to squeeze a two-week vacation after five years of grueling his ass for his family business. His plans to relax take a detour when he meets a fascinating tourist enjoying herself alone. After they tangled in bed, she left him with the intention of never crossing paths again, which he is more than happy to oblige. Her non-clingy attitude increases his estimation of her. __ But fate has other plans as he turns out to be her employer for her biggest deal yet. They are both contracted to work together for the next six months. As the sparks fly, where would it lead them?

I'm hospitalized after a car accident that nearly costs me my leg. Meanwhile, my fiancé is too busy in the room next door taking care of his first love. She's only faking a sprained ankle. From that same room, I hear Johan Rivera's mocking voice. "Raelyn? She's just a pawn the old man picked for a political marriage. She's not even good enough to be your stand-in." In that moment, something in me finally breaks. I watch the news coverage of a rising business star who's surrounded by reporters and flashing cameras. He's also my childhood friend who has pursued me for ten years. I calmly send him a message. "Christian, does your offer for a contract marriage still stand?"

For eight years, I was James Carter's secretary and secret lover. Eight years of giving him my heart completely. I truly believed he loved me back - he was always tender and attentive when we were intimate, seemingly caring about my every need and desire. But then I overheard him telling others, "She's nothing but a stand-in, just someone to satisfy my physical needs when I'm bored. Did you really think I would marry her?" In that moment, I finally found the strength to let go and stop loving him. I handed in my resignation and walked away from it all. Yet after my whirlwind marriage to someone else, why did he suddenly start searching for me desperately across the city? Now he's here with tears in his eyes, claiming I'm the one he truly loves? Wasn't I just his convenient replacement all along?

On the day we were supposed to get our marriage license, Michael Robertson ghosted. I sat outside the County Clerk's Office for hours. Instead of him, I got a pic from his secretary, Kallie Clunt. She was in his lap, arms wrapped around him, making out like it was the hottest scene in a drama. [Sorry, Elsa. Michael said he had to comfort my broken heart. You don't mind, do you?] When I asked him about it, he just looked annoyed. "She gave me blood once. What's the big deal if I hang out with her? Can't you be a little more understanding?" My stomach dropped. I turned away and called his older brother. "Leon, do you still want to marry me?"

After receiving the news that her husband had died during a mission, my sister-in-law collapsed from the shock. When she woke up, she'd lost her memory. She clung to my husband and refused to let go. Our husbands were twin brothers. The doctor said she couldn't be triggered, so my husband and mother-in-law sat me down and begged me to play along until she got over this. Every time I brought it up again, they shut me down. "This is only until she gets her memory back!" So I watched as my husband and his widowed sister-in-law eat, sleep, and live under the same roof. Even our daughter could only stand by and watch her cousin call him "Daddy". One day, my daughter spiked a high fever and wouldn't wake up. I begged my husband to take us to the hospital. Unexpectedly, his sister-in-law went berserk over it and threatened to kill herself. In the chaos, I was stabbed in the heart by the scissors she swung around. When I opened my eyes again, I found myself back to the day my husband agreed to play the role of a substitute husband.

I woke up staring at divorce papers—from the guy I'd crushed on all through college. My name. His. Right there on the page. He said I cheated. Last thing I remembered? Getting ready to finally tell him how I felt at our graduation party. Now suddenly, we've got a four-year-old. And him? He looked at me like I was some rando off the street. No trace of the sweet, soft guy I used to know. Just ice. What did I miss? What the hell happened in the last five years?

Morgan Drake is a 2nd year resident at Sangela City Regional Hospital grappling with depression and addiction, following some recent stressful life events. Disillusioned with his work and current life situation, he is forced to take a trip where he encounters a mysterious s woman: the strong-willed, beautiful and intimidating Maddison Silva whom he is immediately drawn to. An introspective look reveals that he is inadequate for her, which leaves him with two choices: give up on her or put the broken pieces of his life back together. Which option does he choose? If its the latter, who is he changing for? More importantly, if he can get his life together, will she accept him?