Voldemort Funny Novels & Stories

I have to go see Daffy get to class and do Poppy’s assignments. Sitting in the subway bus, I bit my hands trying to assure myself that everything will be fine, but nothing is going to be fine. His scream when I stabbed him keeps echoing in my mind. “I killed someone…. I just murdered a vampire!!”

I swallowed the lump in my throat as he made his way over to his desk. "W-Why was s-she out there?" I asked. Master leaned back against the desk so he was almost sitting on it, placing the leash down in the process. "It's a stupid thing that some vampires do when their pet has misbehaved or they decide that they don't want them anymore." My eyes widened

Rose said with a small pout adoring her lips. "I speak facts only." Vladimir said cockily. A smile broke on her face. "You are full of yourself." She said. Suddenly, Vladimir smirked at her and she sensed that he is going to say something which will make her embarrassed. "I am not full of myself but I would love to fill you with me." He said poking his tongue into his cheeks. "Fill me with what?" She asked confused. The Kings didn't knew what should they do. Should they laugh or cry that they have got such a innocent mate who doesn't even understands their dirty jokes.

"He looks like a snake, ready to bite on your back. Do you know who he reminds me off?" "Who?" "Nagini from Harry Potter. If his nose wasn't that straight, he'd might as well fit voldemort better." "You like Harry Potter?" "Yes! I LOVE Harry Potter." I almost jumped in my spot, drawing out a chuckle from him. "Which of the series is your favorite?" "The first one! I love their innocent, carefree queries in that." I felt him moving, then his breath hit the back of my ear as he whispered. "Just like you." My eyes closed in sheer anguish. Only if he knew how innocent I really was.

“Well, I wouldn’t say that I don’t know anything, but I’m still learning.” He reached up and flicked his ear with a smile. “Goblins don’t have pointed ears, we’re also normal-sized, just like you. House elves don’t even exist, so I’m guessing you’re thinking about those little critters from the wizard movies, what are they called?” “Harry Potter, and they were books first. Really good books, by the way, if you’re a reader.” I could feel my face burning with embarrassment. “Muffler breath? Read? Ha! That’s a good one!” Jade said as she set a drink down in front of him.

Catching the general mood, the friend suspiciously quieted down and shrugged her shoulders vaguely. Lily dared to make an idiotic suggestion, but she was afraid to speak the rest of the thoughts that now lived in her head. They were ridiculous, stupid and ridiculous. — Vampires? she squeezed out the word and prepared to hear laughter in response. The only one who laughed was the wolf: he either laughed or coughed. He produced croaking sounds with an admixture of coughing and snorted contentedly.

Gusev grinned, “Yes, that is so nice of you Almiro! I knew I could depend on you!” “Thank you, Almiro, you could join us here.” I said, patting on the sofa as Gusev arranged it into more comfier. He added blankets and pillows to it. Almiro nodded and sat beside Gusev so now, Gusev was between us. I raised my eyebrows at the vampire, “When were you buddy buddy with my loyal body guard?” He shrugged, positioning himself comfortably on the sofa and grabbed a handful of popcorn, “ The whole day, we finished the whole series of Harry potter. I didn’t know how exciting it was and very amusing…I see why humans get addicted to it.

Voldemort muttered and smiled before he also supersped into the woods . . . . . "You guys are late for dinner as always" A beautiful woman with a frown on her face said immediately she sighted the boys running towards her "Momma!!" Damien squealed like a child before hugging his mom making her chuckle in the process "You cheated" Voldemort said as he hit Damien on his chest while laughing "We are sorry Mom, Damien was just been so playful" Voldemort reported and pecked his mom on her cheeks "Hmmmmmm,yummy"

"Mom, I can't go to the same college as my brother!" Morticia exclaimed from the kitchen. "Too late. You're already admitted. Besides, having your brother with you gives me peace of mind," her mother, Ava, replied calmly from the living room. Rolling her eyes, Morticia peeked out from the kitchen, locking eyes with her mother. "Mom, Vincent is a wizard. He literally tormented me in high school." Vincent, lounging nearby with his legs crossed and sipping a smoothie, winked at her. Morticia felt the urge to gouge his eyes out.

"What? Who said I was thinking anything?" I'd known Vladimir since we were boys. He used to have a dark side to him and would seduce women. During sex with women, he would bite their necks softly at first, causing them to think he was being erotically romantic. However, as they closed their eyes, he would then sink his teeth into them and suck their blood until they died.