You Hurt Yourself To Make Me Stay Novels & Stories

’ “You don't need me in your life, burdening you, getting angry over everything, losing control. What if I hurt you again? What if it's even worse than the last time?” And yet my mind cried, “Let me stay. Let me work on myself and try to take the burden off your shoulders, not add to that. Stay with me and make sure I never lose control again. Don't let me go back to that tasteless life where you’re not there, and the sunlight never reaches me. Don't let me go. Hold on to my arm.” But I would be selfish if I said those words. So I swallowed them all, and they left a bitter taste in my mouth.

Find someone who makes the beast go quiet and hold onto them with everything you have. And if it ends — if the one you love goes away, if the bond breaks, if the worst thing you can imagine happens — choose to love yourself enough to stay whole. Do not do what your father did. Do not do what I am doing now. Choose to stay, Knox. Even when staying is the hardest thing in the world. Choose to stay. You are my heart. You have always been my heart. And I am sorry that my heart wasn’t strong enough to keep beating for you.

Maybe my whole existence had been waiting for this. "Don't go" He nuzzled my neck, and I could already feel my knees giving way. The heat from his chest was already melting away my resistance, and I didn't have it in me to tell him to stop. After all, I had done, after every hurt and every wound I had caused him, and my heart is selfish, it still beating for him and him only. All the words of mia were ringing in my ears. I should not feel pain, I deserved everything, but it hurt too much. "What if I don't? What is going to change if I stay?"

I say again, softer this time. Closer. Leaning in. “You don’t get to leave like this.” Nothing. My chest tightens painfully. No. No, this isn’t how this goes. This isn’t how he goes. “You said I wasn’t leaving,” I whisper. “You don’t get to leave either.” My fingers press harder against the wound. Trying to slow the bleeding. Trying to keep him here. “Come on,” I murmur. “You don’t break, remember?” A flicker.

I say, taking his hand in mine. I don't want to do anyone any harm. No matter if you have terrible or good intentions toward us, I will not be able to utilize you. I'm on the mend. I don't want anyone to become engaged with this. I want to demonstrate to myself that I do not require the assistance of a guy in order to be fixed. I give him a bitter grin, and my hand gently touches his cheeks and massages them.

It’s because there’s a part of me that wants to save myself from all this misery. Maybe if I hurt myself enough then I’ll wake up and realize that she isn’t the one for me. They say that people can only hurt you if you let them... In my case, I let myself be in pain because of her. I need to be hurt. Ahbaya needs to hurt me enough until I wake up to the fact that she is not for me and we would never be right for each other. Even Dane, my Best friend... Even if she punches and kicks me and beats me into a pulp, it would never be enough for me to see the truth. It needs to be Ahbaya.

ever. I hate it that I let you do that to me, that I let you break the promise I made to myself. ............................................ #Day 27. I wish I could device a way to show you how much you have hurt me, screw how vulnerable it makes me, I still want to make you understand what you have made me go through, I want you to feel every single pain I have been through....I never thought that I would ever want someone to go through what I have been through, but I want you to feel every single pain I have ever experienced....I want you destroyed like me, to have nightmares that won't let you sleep.

My chest felt like it was being crushed from the inside. Tears blurred my vision as they spilled down my cheeks. “I didn’t—” My voice trembled. “I didn’t mean—” But the words fell apart before I could finish them. My teeth sank into the edge of my fingernail. Hard. The sharp sting exploded across my tongue as metal and blood filled my mouth. I barely noticed. My body was screaming. Every nerve felt like it was on fire. Hurt yourself. The thought whispered through my mind. Hurt yourself.

The memory twisted something inside me, making my throat tighten. I rubbed my palm against my wrist, trying to ground myself. "I can keep hurting," I whispered. "It’s not about the ability like you think. It’s about the desire." I took a shaky breath. "But don’t ignore me. Please. It’s unbearable. And the longer you do, the more it kills my will to keep trying."

“You’re hurt; you need help.” “Get me out of here. Just help me stand,” I insisted. “You’re a moron. Stay where you are.”