Zaphod's Science Fiction & Fantasy - Hilarious List!

"Damatris what are you doing?" "Don't tell me you don't like it, I've seen you do it with your friends. Why don't you do it to me?" "I can't, you're like a sister to me, I can't fuck you." "I know you like me, I can see it in your eyes, if you don't have sex with me, Regina would.... " *** "No! She can't be the one, I love her, dad please do something." "Nothing can be done right now, look round, your people are dead, we need her blood." "I can't sit and let you kill the woman I love. I don't care if mum's sick or not." "We will elope together." "You'd do no such thing." "Watch me." **** "O my God, I think I'm gonna cum, I screamed as he thrust faster." "Give it to me baby, yes! Emm, just like that. I love you. "O my! Go faster, I'm cumming..." I screamed, when I felt a loud bang and passed out. ~~~~ At age 19, she was married to him, her egocentric husband. Things didn't go smoothly for her at first, all her past mistake came hitting and made her life miserable. When she thought she'd finally gotten peace, they came searching for her, leaving her loved ones in cold blood. Why is nature cruel to her When an ant is in between two hefty elephants, what happens to that ant? It crushes. What happens to her when she finds her true family? Finds that the two guys she loves are sworn enemies, both on earth and on the spiritual. Will she be able to cope when the mystery unveils itself and she founds who the main culprit is?.

All she remembered of that man was his birthmark and a tattoo he had on his back, so how was she going to find him? Her family rejected her and she had to struggle alone to raise her son, the fruit of that night, but after losing her job for the tenth time, her friend nominates her to be a nanny for the CEO's son, but what she doesn't know is that this hot CEO who lost his wife is actually the same man from years ago. " I finally found you!"

Ophelia is the daughter of mafia boss Mitch Geno. All she has ever wanted was to have a normal life, but her life is far from normal. Mitch has made her safety a top priority and assigned Damian Blackman as a personal bodyguard to be with her at all times. Days before her 21st birthday, her father's rival retaliates against the family and all their efforts to keep her safe fail. It becomes a race against time to find her or Mitch will be forced to comply with his rival's demands. In the wake of all the drama, Ophelia and Damian fall in love. He has sworn to protect her with his life and will do anything to keep her safe. But things take a turn for the worst when it is discovered that there is a traitor at the Geno compound. Ophelia is no longer safe in her own home and it falls to Damian to get her to safety. Little does she know; the traitor is someone she knows and trust. When her trust is betrayed and she is handed over to her father's rivals, Damian must redeem himself and help Mitch do whatever it takes to get her back.

"Will you let me love you, my scarlet wolf?" After fleeing her former marriage a bruised and battered woman, Scarlett's only desire is to keep her daughter safe. She plans to take them to a quiet place, as far from her abusive mate as she can get, but it doesn't take long for her to cross paths with Roman Collins, Alpha of the Ironclaw pack. A man who seems to despise her. Since nothing is binding them together she feels she will be free of him soon enough, but the moon goddess has other plans, and she'll find out that if she thought running from one Alpha mate was hard, running from another is even harder! To what lengths will Scarlett go to protect her child? What will she do when she realizes the bond she shares with this other male? And what will she do to the mate who beat her on a daily basis and has now sworn he will never stop until he gets her back? Roman never wears his emotions on his face, but the feelings he has for Scarlett are ones he cannot deny nor ignore. With both of them scarred from past experiences, will they be able to overcome their pain and be together, or will the mates and the past they run from catch up to them?

Confused, shocked and petrified Eva asked that man why he wanted to kill her. She didn't even know him."W-why d-do you want to k-kill me? I d-don't even know you." Eva choked, as his hands were wrapped around her neck tightly. "Because you are my mate!" He growled in frustration. She scratched, slapped, tried to pull the pair of hands away from her neck but couldn't. It was like a python, squeezing the life out of her. Suddenly something flashed in his eyes, his body shook up and his hands released Eva's neck with a jerk. She fell on the ground with a thud and started coughing hard. A few minutes of vigorous coughing, Eva looked up at him."Mate! What are you talking about?" Eva spoke, a stinging pain shot in her neck. "How can I be someone's mate?" She was panting. Her throat was sore already. "I never thought that I would get someone like you as mate. I wanted to kill you, but I changed my mind. I wouldn't kill you, I have found a way to make the best use out of you. I will throw you in the brothel." He smirked making her flinch. Her body shook up in fear. Mate is someone every werewolf waits for earnestly. Mate is someone every werewolf can die for. But things were different for them. He hated her mate and was trying to kill her. What the reason was? Who would save Eva from him?

Needing to get married before his grandfather dies, Dr. Lyrek Cole goes to the bar to drink away his problems. There he meets the most beautiful bartender he has ever saw. Captivated by her beauty, he tries to catch her attention. Veronica Reed, however, is too preoccupied with her own troubles to notice him. She is drowning in medical bills and her brother is dying of a brain tumor, which is why she is works four jobs. Her brother's brain tumor is inoperable, but she is doing everything she can, in hopes of saving him. Little does she know, Lyrek is exactly who she needs to save her brother. Only if she agrees to marry him. Not only because is the best brain surgeon in the world, but also because he has more money then he knows what to do with.

"Why are you acting all mean and rude? I'm just trying to be nice here" he snapped making me stop and turned to glare at him. "I never told you to be nice! Why don't you go back to your little world and forget that I exist like you used to do?" I sneered. "Why the sudden interest!" I yelled in frustration and walked away from him. The bad Boy was simply infuriating. I was stopped. I flew in his chest as he gripped on my wrist and pulled me to him. My back was pressed against his chest and I could feel him breathing next to my ear. "Once I aim for someone, I always get her" he whispered huskily.

Fia Lawson had been in love with Conrad Maxwell for years. She knew that he had a childhood friend whom he loved, so she hid her feelings for him in the deepest part of herself. She never had any expectations about it. Then one day, his beloved suddenly left the country and she was forced to become the sacrificial lamb for their families’ alliance. After their marriage, he was the perfect husband. Even when he knew that she was infertile, he protected her. Three years later, while she was still drowning in bliss, he asked for a divorce and wanted her to set him free.“I’m pregnant.”“You’re lying. You’re infertile.”She finally had a child after being on medication for two years. She wanted to keep their marriage from falling apart.“Our marriage is a mistake. If we’re going to separate, we should cut each other off completely!”The only thing that could match the level of anguish she felt was how deep her love was for him.

How can someone fall in love when they don't even know who they are? At the age of ten, she was left at the orphanage without any recollection of who she was and where she came from. Twenty years later, Clara now the CEO of her own security company, SST, provides top-of-the-line security systems and technology that stamps out the competition. If only they could get the biggest shipping company in the country to upgrade their outdated system. But it seems that the CEO, Sebastian Colfer, will do everything to thwart their efforts. Or so it seems. Behind his icy demeanor, he has a hidden agenda. The mystery surrounding her appearance at the orphanage keeps her busy these days, and having somebody in her life is not part of her plan. ---=--- This book is purely fictional. Any similarities with people in real life are purely coincidental. ---=--- Sitting in the back seat of the car, Clara could feel the heat emanating from his body. His legs were spread out a little too wide, and they were rubbing against her outer thigh. She tried not to let it affect her, but his arm seemed to graze hers every time the car moved, and that unnerved her a little. They were sitting a little too close if you asked her. She tried to get away from him, as far as the space could allow, but her brother won't cooperate. He scolded her to stop squirming. She was just trying to find a comfortable position that would keep their body parts from touching. Sebastian was tormenting her and she's had enough, elbowing her brother she told him to switch places with her. ‘Are you scared of me?’ Sebastian whispered.

She stared at him with hooded eyes, heated breaths mingling in the air between them, "If you agree to this, there's no turning back." His fingers dug into the curve of her ass and she mewled helplessly, "So tell me, flower. Do you agree?" As she gazed into his dark orbs, a fiery passion ignited within her chest. She wanted this, wanted him. But most all, she wanted to forget. "Yes," She replied breathlessly, pressing her bare breasts into his hard chest, "Yes, I agree." *********** Aurora is the perfect little princess, or so everyone thinks. She is smart, beautiful, a ballet prodigy and is also from an affluent family. All her life, Aurora has always been told what to do, how to act and even down to what she should eat. Her overbearing mother constantly dictates how she should live her life. In the eyes of everyone, she is little miss perfect. But little did they know, she was hiding a secret. A big one. And it came in the form of a devilishly handsome boxer.