It’s already 8 o'clock in the morning when I went to my Father’s office and talked about last night. Sa sobrang pagod ko kagabi ay nakatulog na ako sa sasakyan pauwi and when I woke up, I’m at my room already. Hindi maipinta ang mukha ko nang lumabas sa office ni dad. Paano ba naman kasi, he declined my proposal!
*****
“What brings you here early in the morning?” He coldly asked as I enter his office. He’s currently drinking his coffee.
“I have a proposal. I just gathered an important information regarding the incident last night and I won’t tell it to you unless you give me permission to be part of this mission,” I confidently offered that made him stop from drinking.
“You don’t know how to give up, right? How many times do I have to tell you, an A-rank includes killing, can you do that?” he asked, challenging me.
“But we can came up with a plan that won’t make us kill,” I insist.
“Then tell me what’s that plan.” He crossed his arms while waiting for my answer.
“I haven’t thought about it yet,” I said while looking down.
“Then why are you still standing there?” he coldly ask and I already know what it means. Hindi ako gumalaw sa kinatatayuan ko at nanatili lang na nakayuko sa harapan niya.
“Don’t make me repeat myself. You can now leave,” ma-otoridad niyang saad pero hindi pa rin ako umaalis doon.
“Fevianna.”
“Tell me!” I raised my voice that surprises my Dad.
“Tell me what will I do for you to acknowledge me also,” nakayuko ko pa ring saad, “to be proud at me,” mahinang sambit ko.
Nang tingnan ko siya ay wala pa rin itong emosyon. Nakatingin lang siya sa akin at hinihintay kung may susunod pa ba akong sasabihin.
“Nevermind. Just forget what I said,” nagmamadali kong saad at padabog na lumabas doon.
*****
“You look pissed,” my little sister Fionna appeared in front of me. sa sobrang inis ko, hindi ko na napansin ang presensya niya.
“Let me guess, you failed again from your previous mission? As always,” she slightly laughed, teasing me.
“If you’re planning to make fun of me, I will not give you the satisfaction,” I said with poker face.
“Why would I do that? I should be comforting you, you’re my dearest big sister,” she sarcastically said and rubbed my shoulder as if she’s really comforting me.
I faked a smile, “I’m fine by myself. I don’t need your comfort, my dearest little sister,” I said then left.
This is the usual us. No bonds at all. We’re living at the same roof but we treat each other like rival. We’re family but we’re not, that’s the very first thing our father taught us the time we stepped in this house.
What to expect? We didn’t live together when we were a child. I was raised by my Grandmother in my Mother’s side (Dad’s first wife who passed away the moment she gave birth to me). Fionna and our youngest Fellin, were raised by their Mother (which is my Father’s second wife who also passed away last year because of disease) far away from this place. So basically, we met each other when we were fifteen, our debut for being official assassins. Though our family, butlers and higher officials are the only persons who have knowledge about our true identity.
Our youngest is the one who’s really hard to deal with. She’s not into socializing. Among the three of us, she suffers more in training that made it lost her emotions. Their mom pressured her because she wants Fellin to be the heiress of Lauriel Family. Frankly, their Mother trusts Fellin more than Fionna. While I’m just chillin’ with my Grandmother who really not pressured me, in fact, she’s spoiling me that’s why my Dad only sees me as a child who tantrums whenever I didn’t get what I want. Speaking of my Grandmother, I already missed her. I haven’t seen her since I moved to this house, it’s been 7 years.
I was busy mesmerizing when one of our butler knocked at my room. “Lady Fev, your father wants to talk with you.”
“We have nothing more to talk about,” I frankly said while lying on my bed.
“He has something important to tell you,” he insisted.
“What’s more important than approving my proposal?” I sarcastically said rolling my eyes even though he can’t see it.
“Your father wants to reconsider, he’s now taking you as part of this A-rank mission,” he said that made me immediately jumped out of my bed.
“Where is he?” I asked as I open the door.
“He’s currently discussing things with Gin in his office and he wants to ask you some information according the incident last night,” he formally said.
I immediately get there without a word, pero pagpasok ay hindi ko inaasahan ang nadatnan ko.
“What are you doing here?” I surprisingly asked. My two sisters are sitting at the couch, drinking tea in front of our Father.
“Lady Fev, kanina ka pa hinihintay ng Daddy mo,” Gin’s standing behind the couch facing my Father. Since nakatalikod si Dad ay hindi na rin siya nag-abalang tumingin pa sa akin. I faked a cough.
“You’re such a pa-v.i.p. person,” Fionna uttered and rolled her eyes. Tahimik lang na nakatingin ng diretso si Fellin sa mga papel na nasa lamesa, didn’t even bothered at my presence.
“Sit down, Fev,” my Father commanded. Umupo ako sa couch.
“Tell me all you know about those guys, their movement, anything you observed from them,” saad nito pagka-upo ko nang hindi pa rin tumitingin sa akin.
“As we arrived at the hotel, I haven’t noticed their presence. Hindi ko pa malalaman na ni-lolocate na nila ako kung hindi pa ako tinawagan ni Gin,” I started.
“Baka you’re not paying attention to your target kasi. No wonder hindi ka pinagkakatiwalaan sa mas mataas na missions,” sumbat ng pakialamera kong kapatid.
“Fion.” nagbabantang saad ni Dad na nagpatigil kay Fion. Ngumisi lang ako nang hindi sila tinitingnan. “Continue,” muling saad niya.
Tahimik lang na nakatayo sa gilid si Gin, pati si Fellin ay napunta na rin ang antensyon sa sasabihin ko.
“Minutes later, a man wearing a black suit appeared right in front of me. He talks just like he knew you, and he was expecting me to be there,” I saw my Father’s curiosity as I said those words.
“Do you have an idea who’s he?” he asked.
“Yes, I think I’ve seen him before. But one thing is for sure, there’s a traitor among our butlers,” I stated that surprised my sisters and Gin.
“How could you accuse so easily? Do you have a solid evidence to support your claim?” Fion contradicts me. Inirapan ko lang siya at tinuloy ang pagkukwento.
“I have basis. Only the higher officials knew our true identity outside our house. I doubt that the person I encountered last night is a politician. I can say that he once worked as one of our butlers,” I added.
“How can you say so? Maraming nagkalat na assassin sa mundo, don’t just conclude nonsense things,” she also added.
“Then how come he knew our Dad?” I debated and she can’t find any answers anymore.
“That’s possible,” our Dad said that caught our attention, “If I’m not mistaken, someone’s carrying the Verlian’s will,” dagdag nito na nagpasalubong ng kilay ko.
“Verlian’s will?” Fellin asked. Nakita ko ang interesadong mga mata nito. Bigla niya na lang itinabi ang binabasa kanina at ngayon ay tutok na sa usapan.
“Verlian family was the number one famous assassin many years ago. They want all assassins to unite but my father opposed to. And because of that, they became our family’s rival,” Biglang naging seryoso ang emosyon nito. “A huge mistake happened that result our family to turn upside down. The dispute between Verlian and Lauriel was done and we won. But I wasn’t expecting that there’s a survivor of Verlian clan.” Mariin niyang isinara ang kamao at mahahalata sa itsura nito ang galit.
“So what are you planning to do” I asked.
“That’s why I need your strength. Gin told me how powerful those guys are, they are no doubt, an assassin and probably working with Verlian,” he explained.
“And?” I asked.
“And you sisters will be having a collaboration for this mission,” he added that surprised us.
“What? Me and my sisters? A collaboration? Are you out of your mind, Dad?!” Fion stood up, complaining. That’s the very first time I agreed to her, there’s no way we, sisters, can work together.
Nasanay kami sa individual missions. But unlike me, my sisters are already capable of taking part of an A-rank.
“I can’t imagine working with them also,” I seconded.
“Are you opposing me?” our Dad asked that intimidate us.
“I won’t let you work together if not necessary. The way you treat each other, I’m fully aware that you’re not comfortable with each other. But this is a mission, our personal feelings are not involve. Set that aside first for the meantime because you’ll be having teamwork and I need your full cooperation.” he explained.
“Is there any more complaints?” tanong niya pero hindi na namin magawa pang magreklamo ni Fion.
“I’m in,” Fellin said and we all looked at her.
“Are you serious, Fellin? As far as I can remember, you hate teamwork because they’re just a nuisance to you,” Fion once again asked.
“But the fact that we will all work together, this really is not just an ordinary A-rank. That means, we need to act as one and use each other’s abilities. Am I right?” she explained that made me realized things.
That’s right. Fion is the fastest among us three, she can knock down her opponent in seconds. Fellin is smart, she can predict any possible scenarios and always have a back-up plan. While I’m good at sensing human presence and also concealing mine. Since our opponent is not just an ordinary person, our teamwork would be a big help for this mission.
“Then it’s settled.” Our dad stood up.
“The first collaboration of elite sisters. I’m expecting you three to finish this as soon as possible,” he said with authority. Tumalikod siya sa amin at naglakad palapit sa pintuan, pero bago pa siya lumabas ay may iniwan pa siyang salita na nagpalunok sa akin. “Failing a mission should not be tolerated.” He then looked at me before leaving.
“Ahhh!”Hawak-hawak ko ang balakang ko nang pwersahan akong mapaupo sa sahig. Pang-ilang araw na naming training dito pero parang wala pa ring nagbabago sa akin. Gano’n pa rin ako... Mahina.“Tayo!” sigaw ni Selena.Agad ko ring inayos ang sarili ko at muli siyang hinarap. Ngayon ay matalim siyang nakatitig sa mga mata ko na tila ba may hinahanap ito roon.“Show me your wrath!”Mariin ko siyang tiningnan at naghanda na sa susunod na pag atake pero nalalabanan niya iyon lahat.“Kulang pa iyan!” muling sigaw niya at tila ba mas galit pa siya sa akin ngayon.Muli akong sumubok pero wala talaga, sadyang mas malakas siya sa akin at wala na akong magagawa roon!Huminto muna ako at ipinatong ang mga kamay sa tuhod ko habang hinihingal. She's just watching me at tila ba disappointed ito sa mga nagiging kilos ko.“Is that all you’ve got, Fevianna?” she asked, irritated.“Pagod na ak—”“Do I gav
I have a bad feeling about this. Bakit ganito ang nararamdaman ko? Hindi na dapat talaga ako sumama, e!And to that woman, Selena! Bakit kung makatingin siya sa akin ay iba? Para bang handa ako nitong sakmalin anumang oras o kaya naman may binabalak siyang hindi maganda sa akin.I should be careful.Nagpapahinga na kami ngayon sa kaniya-kaniya naming kwarto. Thank God I’m alone now. Ang tanging sinabi lang sakin ni Matthew ay mas mapapalakas ako rito. And I think the person he was talking about na makakatulong sa akin ay si Selena. But what's with her presence?She’s a filipino residing here in England kaya nakakaintindi pa rin siya ng tagalog although mas na-aadapt niya na ang slang dito. And I need to get ready dahil magsisimula na bukas ang training namin. Malakas ang pakiramdam kong iba kung magtrain si Selena, sa presensya niya pa lang ay natitinag na ako, paano pa kaya kung nasa mismong training na kami?Gawa na rin ng sobrang pagod
“Are you all set?”Nalipat ang tingin ko sa repleksyon ni Gin sa salamin nang bigla na lang itong pumasok ng kwarto habang inaayusan ko ang sarili ko.I put on my lipstick before I stood up and turn to look at him.“Let's go,” I answered, blankly.Ngayon na ang alis namin at nagdesisyon akong baguhin ang lahat-lahat sa akin.I wore a skin-toned backless crop top and black high waist jeans. Naka-pony tail din ako kaya naman lantad na lantad ang balat ko sa likod.Hindi rin makatingin ng diretso sa akin si Gin na tila ba naiilang ito pero wala na akong pakialam. Inayos ko na lang ang mga gamit ko bago ito binigay sa kaniya. Pero bago pa ako lumabas ng kwarto ay pinagmasdan ko muna ang sarili sa salamin.I smirk as I saw my reflection on the mirror. Who would've thought that I actually became the bitch I didn't what to be?I put on my stilettos and compose myself. Bumagay ang suot ko sa pulang-pulang mga labi ko. A
I swear to myself that this will be my last tears. Sawang-sawa na akong makaramdam ng sakit. Sa sunod-sunod na sakit na nalalaman ko ay unti-unti ako nitong minamanhid. And this is what I want...To be numb.Magdamag ko na atang naibuhos lahat ng luha ko dahil kinabukasan ay tila wala na akong maramdaman na kahit ano. Blangko na ang lahat-lahat sa akin. I can't trust anyone anymore, even myself.Or rather... I don't know myself... anymore.Umiling ako saka dumiretso na lang ng banyo para maligo. After doing my morning ritual ay lumabas na rin ako ng kwarto at naabutan pa si Gin na mukhang papunta ng kwarto ko.He stopped for a while when he saw me but later on continue to saunter towards me.“I have something to tell you,” he said.Hindi ako sumagot. Nanatili lang akong nakatayo sa harapan niya habang hinihintay ang susunod nitong sasabihin.“We’re going in England,” he added that immediately fixed my
Wala akong ibang ginawa kundi ang umiyak lang nang umiyak. Luckily, I was alone since Gin gave me time for myself. Hinayaan ko lang ang sarili kong maging mahina at mugtong-mugto na ang mga mata.I can’t even remember if I ate dinner. I just let myself be tired of crying until I fell asleep.Nagising na lang ako dahil sa sunod-sunod na katok sa pintuan.“Are you awake? I brought you food,” rinig ko ang mahinahong boses ni Gin mula sa labas.I was just staring at the ceiling for a few minutes until I heaved a deep sigh.“Come in,” I utter.Maya-maya lang din ay pumasok siyang may dalang tray ng pagkain. He first look at me as if observing me and my next move. “Kumusta ka?” With that question, I froze. Hindi ko alam na sa simpleng tanong lamang na ‘yon ay mahihirapan akong sagutin. I didn’t mean to make its meaning doubled but I just can’t distinguish what kind of question he wanna ask.Kumusta ako physically? Emotionally? Mentally? No. I am not okay, but this will gonna be okay... s
Tears are still streaming down my face when I hurriedly hopped inside of Gin’s car. “Lady Fev—”“Let’s go.”He didn’t question anymore when he saw my reaction. Muli niyang pinaandar ang sasakyan at mas malumanay na lang ngayon ang patakbo niya.Later on, he grope something in front and gave me the tissue. I hesitated first from accepting it but this is not the time to higher my pride. Kinuha ko ‘yon at naging tahimik na kami sa buong biyahe habang hinahayaan niya akong ilabas lahat ng luha ko. I am even sobbing but he’s just acting like he can’t hear me so that I can have a privacy.I feel like crying is not enough to ease my madness. I felt like I am enduring the problem of a whole nation. Sobrang bigat sa pakiramdam!I don’t know where he’s taking me but it was like we’re going up a mountain. Hinayaan ko na lang siya dahil sa ngayon ay wala pa akong ganang makipag-usap.Until later on, we stopped at the edge