Chapter 4

"Sorry po, sir," sabi ko na lang saka nagmadaling umalis sa harapan niya at nilapitan 'yong classmate kong tumawag sa akin.

Muntik kaming magkabangga! Like we were really just a few inches away from each other! Buti na lang mukhang mabilis ang reflex ni Sir.

Habang naglalakad ako palayo ay ramdam ko ang bilis ng pagtibok ng puso ko. I don't even know what made this heart beat like this. I tried calming myself pero nagpa-panic pa rin ako.

Ano bang meron kay Sir?

"Hi, Hope! Gusto lang sana kitang i-invite sa orientation ng org namin. Baka gusto mong sumali. We know you're into music and we really want you in our org," my classmate said. Sa kagustuhan kong makaalis na ng building ay napatango na lang ako.

Ever since first year, they're already trying to recruit me to join the org. Pero dahil wala akong lakas ng loob ay hindi ako sumali.

"Great! We'll expect you to be there!" Masayang sabi niya bago umalis. Nagmadali na rin akong umalis para sumunod kina Clarisse.

Kinakalma ko pa rin ang sarili ko. Nakalabas na ako ng building pero ramdam ko pa rin ang lakas ng tibok ng puso ko. Para bang ayaw niyang tumigil.

"Oh, napano 'yang puso mo?" Tanong ni Clarisse. I didn't notice I was already rubbing my chest.

"Wala," sagot ko na lang while trying to look calm. Ayaw ko namang mahalata nilang natataranta ako.

"Namumula ka," Lio commented.

With that, I even panicked more. I hurriedly touched my face na pinagtawanan ng dalawa. They're not helping. Feeling ko aatakihin na ako sa puso tapos there they are, laughing at me.

"Guys, it's not funny," I said. Nagsimula na akong maglakad palayo sa kanila but the two followed.

"Ang cute mo kasing mag-panic. Ano bang nangyari?" Asked Lio. Napahinto ako sa paglalakad at napatingin sa kanila.

"Halata ba?" I queried. I looked at Clarisse and she was about to laugh. Si Lio naman ay parang nawi-weirduhan sa akin.

"Tell me nga. Nagkasalubong ba kayo ni Sir Troy?" Clarisse asked. My eyes automatically widened. She can't just say it like it's nothing! Baka may makarinig pa sa amin at masabihan akong delusional.

"Wait, what's with this Sir Troy? Is it the thing you were talking about earlier?" He questioned. "Crush mo ba siya, Hope?!"

"Ano ba! Baka may makarinig sa inyo. Nakakahiya talaga kayong kasama. Pinapahiya niyo pa ako," I muttered. Nagsimula na ulit akong maglakad at mas binilisan ko pa. But the two still followed me at binilisan rin nila ang paglalakad kaya they were able to catch up.

"Woah, woah, woah. Easy there, Mary Hope Rivera," he mumbled. I rolled my eyes even if they won't see it.

"So ano nga?" Lio asked again.

"Nothing," I hurriedly replied.

I already reached where I parked my car. I hurriedly went iniside. Iiwanan ko na sana ang dalawa to avoid Lio's questions and Clarisse's teasings but they were quick to slid their selves inside the car. Kainis.

As I focused on driving, I heard Clarisse started telling everything to Lio. If only I could be deaf for just a while para lang 'wag sila marinig. It's making me cringe.

"Ang tanga mo nga, Hope," Lio laughingly commented when Clarisse told her about me singing not knowing there was someone around and that it was Sir Troy and I didn't know he was an instructor.

I just kept rolling my eyes whenever I hear Lio's side comments. He's too talkative for a guy. Lagi niya rin akong pinagti-tipan pati si Clarisse. Some people even think he's gay. Well, he's really not. I know it because he kept telling me about this special girl he always liked na hindi ko naman alam kung sino. Itong mga tao kasi minsan ang hilig mag-stereotype. Just because Lio's best friends are girls does not mean he's gay. And even if one day he'll say that he is indeed gay, we will accept him with open arms. Homophobics are not allowed in my circle.

When I reached the parking lot of the building where our next class would be, I hurriedly went out and left the two still talking about me.

I could still hear them talking about what happened when we were walking up the stairs. I shushed them and they just laughed at me.

"Later naman natin pag-usapan. Takot 'yan malaman ng iba na crush niya si-"

"Say that again at magagalit na talaga ako," I said. I'm not really the kind na madaling magalit. I just said it to stop her from talking.

"Okies," she replied. She even gestured zipping up her mouth.

"Zip your mouth up, too, Lio!" Clarisse said to Lio and they both look crazy now. Napailing na lang ako sa trip ng dalawa.

-

After class, Clarisse, Lio, my sisters and I decided to have early dinner at our favorite café. Wala kasi ngayon ang parents namin sa bahay at may sakit si Manang so no one's going to prepare some dinner at home. Masyado na rin kaming tinamad para maghanda pa.

We were just waiting for our orders to arrive. Si Faith ay busy sa pagso-solve ng mga problems at kung ano-anong numbers na may kasama nang letters ang sinusulat niya. Nakakakita pa lang ako ng equation pakiramdam ko sumasakit na ang ulo ko.

Si Love naman ay busy sa pakikipag-usap kina Clarisse and Lio. These three are so close. Palibhasa they're all so into talking. Kung saan-saan na napupunta ang pinag-uusapan nila.

Ayaw ko namang mapunta sa akin ang usapan kaya nanahimik na lang ako. I don't want them talking about our instructor again. Marami pa namang mga students ngayon ang nandito and I don't want them to hear anything about it. Nakakahiya.

I kept drinking my water that I didn't notice kalahati na pala ang nainom ko. Masyado kasi akong naging bored. Napansin ata 'yon ni Faith kaya agad siyang napatingin sa akin.

"Hope, nauubos mo na 'yang tubig mo. Mawawalan ka na naman ng ganang kumain niyan," she mumbled. Agad ko na lang ibinalik sa table ang baso.

"Bored kasi ako. Turuan mo na nga lang ako niyang ginagawa mo," I said. She just stared at me. A few seconds have passed and she didn't say anything. "Faith?"

That's when she finally went back to her senses. Nabigla ko ata siya.

"Well, I'm trying to solve some Differential equations," she began. She then showed me her paper and written there are a lot of numbers and letters combined by mathematical operations and exponents. Para akong nahilo nang makita lahat ng 'yon.

"This is how-"

"Okay, 'wag na lang pala. Magkakasakit ata ako diyan," I said. She laughed at me and got her paper back.

"I knew you would say that," she grumbled.

Our orders finally arrived kaya hindi ko na kailangan pang ma-bored. It's time to pay my attention to the food I'm going to eat. Finally!

I got all the food I want and I looked happily at my plate. Hindi naman ako ganoon katakaw but food always give me comfort. Kaya kapag na-stress sa mga bagay-bagay, kain talaga ang katapat.

I was going to bring the spoon to my mouth when Clarisse poked me.

"Si sir," she whispered. They were all looking now at the entrance. And when I looked there, I saw Sir Troy with the girl he was with last time.