Chapter 2: Familiar Traits

“Evren, wag mong akyatin ang mesa, baka ka mahulog!” paalala ko habang inilalagay ang mga bagong lutong cookies sa plato.

Evren quickly climbed down and looked at me with a guilty yet adorable expression. “Sorry, Mommy. I just wanted to get the cup.”

Soleil giggled while sitting on the chair, swinging her legs back and forth. “Evren is clumsy! But I am a good girl, right Mommy?”

Lumapit ako at hinaplos ang pisngi ni Soleil bago hinarap si Evren. “You are both good kids. But you have to be careful, okay? I don’t want anyone to get hurt.”

Nang makaupo na silang dalawa at nagsimulang kumain, umupo ako sa tapat nila at pinagmasdan sila nang mabuti. Parang nakikita ko si Lucien sa bawat galaw ni Evren—ang paraan ng pagkuyom ng kanyang kamay, ang seryosong tingin kapag nag-iisip, at ang matatapang na kilos. Even Soleil, as bubbly and cheerful as she is, has that same sharp gaze when she focuses on something. It’s terrifying and beautiful at the same time. It reminds me that they are truly his children, but they are mine to love and nurture.

“Mommy, where do babies come from?” biglang tanong ni Soleil habang puno pa ng mumo ang bibig.

Nagulat ako sa tanong niya at muntik nang mabilaukan. “Uh… well… they come from heaven, sweetie. God sends them to mommies and daddies who can take care of them.”

“What about our daddy?” tanong naman ni Evren, tumitig sa akin nang diretso, ang mga matang parang tumatagos sa kaluluwa ko. “Where is he? Other kids have daddies. Why don’t we?”

Tumigil ang mundo ko sa sandaling iyon. Ito ang tanong na laging kinatatakutan ko. Ito ang paksang lagi kong iniiwasan. Sa loob ng limang taon, hindi nila ito tinanong nang diretsahan, pero ngayon na lumalaki na sila, nagiging mas mausisa na sila.

Kinagat ko ang ibabang labi ko at huminga nang malalim bago sumagot, pinipilit na maging kalmado ang boses ko. “Your daddy… he had to go away for a very important work. He lives far, far away. And… he doesn’t know about you guys.”

“Bakit hindi niya alam?” tanong ni Soleil, ang kanyang mga mata ay puno ng pagkalito. “Didn’t he want to meet us?”

“No, baby. It’s not that he didn’t want to. It’s just… things were complicated back then. He didn’t know I was going to have you two. And… it’s better this way. You have me, right? Isn’t Mommy enough for you?” I asked, my voice cracking a little.

Agad na umiling si Evren at lumapit sa akin para yakapin nang mahigpit. “Mommy is enough! You are the best mommy in the whole world. We don’t need anyone else.”

Soleil nodded vigorously and hugged me too. “Yes! We love you, Mommy. Only you.”

Napaluha ako sa kanilang sinabi at niyakap ko sila nang mahigpit na mahigpit, tila ba ayaw ko nang pakawalan pa sila. “Thank you, babies. I love you both so much. More than anything.”

Pero kahit sabihin nilang sapat lang ako, alam kong darating ang panahon na maghahanap sila ng sagot. Darating ang araw na magtatanong sila ulit, at mas mahirap nang ang mga tanong nila. Darating ang araw na malalaman nila ang katotohanan—kung sino ang ama nila, kung ano ang nakaraan namin, at kung bakit kailangan naming magtago.

Pero hindi ngayon. Not while I can still protect them. Not while I am still strong enough to keep the secret buried deep within my heart.

Pagkatapos nilang kumain, tinulungan nila akong magligpit ng mga pinagkainan. Kahit bata pa sila, sanay na silang tumulong sa mga gawaing bahay. I raised them to be kind, humble, and helpful—mga katangiang alam kong wala kay Lucien. Siya ay makasarili, mapanghusga, at laging nasa itaas ng iba. Ayokong maging katulad nila siya. Gusto kong lumaki silang mabubuting tao, kahit na galing sila sa isang mapait na nakaraan.

“Can we go to the market tomorrow, Mommy? I want to buy new ribbons,” hiling ni Soleil habang nagpupunas ng mesa gamit ang maliit na basahan.

“Me too! I want to buy new crayons,” dagdag ni Evren.

Tumango ako. “Okay, we will go tomorrow. But promise me, you will stay close to me, okay? Do not wander off. Maraming tao sa palengke, at ayokong mawala kayo.”

“We promise!” sabay nilang sagot.

Pero habang pinapanood ko silang naglalaro ulit sa sala pagkatapos ng aming meryenda, hindi nawala ang kaba sa dibdib ko. Ang palengke ay isang pampublikong lugar. Maraming tao, maraming dumadaan, at hindi ko maiiwasang mag-isip—paano kung may makakita sa kanila? Paano kung may taong galing sa lungsod na makapansin ng pagkakahawig nila kay Lucien?

Sa loob ng limang taon, naging maingat ako sa lahat ng bagay. Hindi ako gumagamit ng social media. Bihira lang kaming lumabas. Gumagamit ako ng ibang pangalan kapag kailangan. Pero ang mukha ng mga anak ko—iyon ang hindi ko maitatago. Their faces are the living proof of our past. They are the mirror image of the man I ran away from.

Kinagat ko ang kuko ko habang nakaupo sa gilid, nakatingin sa kanila. Lucien Vale Montero. Kung alam mo lang na may mga anak ka. Kung alam mo lang na dito kami, nabubuhay nang payapa at malayo sa iyo. Ano kaya ang gagawin mo?

Sigurado akong kukunin mo sila. You will claim them as your heirs, as your blood, and you will take them away from me. Hindi ka papayag na lumaki sila sa ganitong uri ng buhay—payak, simple, at malayo sa kapangyarihan at impluwensya. You will take them because you think you have the right, because you are powerful, and because you always get what you want.

But you don’t have the right. You lost that right the moment you lied to me. You lost that right when you humiliated me in front of everyone. You lost that right when you treated me like I was nothing.

And I will never let you know. I will carry this secret to my grave if I have to.

Evren suddenly looked at me and smiled—a smile that reached his eyes, a smile that made my heart ache. “Mommy, come play with us!”

Tumayo ako at pinunasan ang luhang muntik nang tumulo sa mata ko. “Okay, I’m coming.”

Habang nakikipaglaro ako sa kanila, habang tumatawa kami at naghahabulan sa loob ng maliit naming bahay, ipinangako ko sa sarili ko. I will do everything in my power to keep them safe. I will build walls around us so high that no one can enter, not even their own father.

Hiding the mayor’s twins is my burden, my mission, and my life. And for the next years to come, I will continue to hide them, protect them, and love them—far away from the ruthless mayor who once destroyed me, and far away from the world that tried to break me.

Little did I know, however, that the peaceful life I built was slowly starting to crumble. That shadows from the past were already creeping closer, and that the man I was running from was already looking for something he didn’t even know existed.

But for now, in this moment, everything is perfect. Everything is fine.

And I will hold on to this perfect moment for as long as I can.