Actually Funny Jokes For Adults Novels & Stories

My girlfriend keeps saying that she comes from a poor family, but she gives her childhood sweetheart a yacht on our anniversary. I text her to ask about this, but all she does is berate me. "Who do you think you are? How dare you stick your nose into my business! I'll give anyone whatever I want. My money, my call. Get lost!" Unbeknownst to her, I'm covered in blood on the other end of the line.

In my parents' hearts, there was always a "perfect son" who died too soon. I was just his flawed substitute, while my younger brother was their new hope. They pretended to be poor for 20 years, secretly funneling all their resources to him. While I was in the final stages of stomach cancer, writhing in pain, they were spending millions of dollars to build him a state-of-the-art study room. When the doctor told me to notify my family about hospital bills, I felt helpless, thinking they were just ordinary, broke workers. When my mom finally showed up at the hospital, she grabbed my hand, not out of concern. "Neville is under so much stress with his college entrance exams. Can you not die right now? He can't take it." My dad stood by, wearing a stern expression. "David was way more sensible than you."

When I submit my resignation letter, my boyfriend, Daniel Carter, happens to have an arm around the new intern, Kimberley Lester, while teaching her how to secure a deal that's worth ten million dollars. After he's done with his lesson, he finally spares my resignation letter a glance. "What are you on about this time, my dearest sales champion?" I reply calmly, "I've already transferred all details of the company's clientele to others. I don't want any bonuses and commissions of this quarter. In fact, I've already had the finance department recall the funds and list it as the company's funds." Daniel is stunned for a moment. But he still thinks that I'm trying to gain his attention by sacrificing my own benefits. "You don't want money, huh? Then what do you want? You want me to fire Kimmy? Or you want me to give you some of the company's shares?" He passes a cup of coffee to me, thinking that I'll act the same way I did in the past—that I'll endure everything and keep working my ass off for the sake of my sales team. But I just shake my head. Now, I just want Daniel to watch his company fall into bankruptcy.

The Falcon Ridge Series Book 1 Anna Riker: I have no patience for the military Security unit. I have a giant chip on my shoulder and it didn't help when one soldier almost gets himself killed and I have to save him. There's something about this soldier that gets under my skin. I don't want to find out, but the closer I get, the more I can't help myself. River Blake: I'm next in line to take over my pack. I joined the security unit over a year ago to appease my father. When he says I need my fated mate to get my title, yeah I'm angry. Until I see a woman, dressed in leather. She says our future together could never be, but I'll do everything i can to prove to her that she's for me and I'm for her. Michael Dorian: I know Im being used. I didn't mind at first, but now things have changed. When she meets some soldier, a rage boils in my gut. Like a powder keg ready to explode. I have to prove to Anna she's for me and only me. And I will. Even if I have commit treason and murder to do it.

Christmas is the most magical time of the year, right? That may be true for most people but not Julia. Julia has never had an easy life, she has been homeless for as long as she can remember and now she is raising a three-year-old the same way. She wants more for them both but she has no way of changing things, besides she's soon going to have to leave the only place that she's ever called home to keep them both safe. If anyone finds out her secret her world will be blown apart and that's something that she can't allow to happen. Riley has had the best life imaginable. He has loving parents, grandparents and his best friend Joshua has been by his side since he was a young child. He also runs several successful businesses and has everything he wants in life except for one thing... love. He wants someone to love, to cherish but his past still has a tight grip on him and holds a secret that not even he knows about. What will happen when both worlds collide? Can Julia get the Christmas that she has always dreamed of for her and her little girl? Can Riley learn to forget his past so that he can move forward and when Juila's secret is revealed and blows both of their worlds apart, will it bring them together or tear them even further apart and destroy Julia's world, just like she has always feared it would?

After graduating from NYU, Victory Sinclair had her life all planned out. Well, at least the career part, that is. She has been accepted into one of New York’s leading advertising and media agency and will be joining the agency as a personal assistant to the CEO. Little did she know, a strange twist of fate is about to change the course of her future. An unfortunate accident with Arthur Knight resulted in serious consequences that would alter both their futures. What will Victory do? Would she succumb to pressure or would she follow what her heart tells her to?

Aiden and Wyatt have been best friends since they were kids. Wyatt's grandfather wished to see his girlfriend before he died, but the problem is Wyatt doesn't have one. And so, he thought of hiring a fake girlfriend. Since Wyatt is popular, a lot of girls applied to be his girlfriend, but he didn't like any of them at all. And that's when the craziness hit Wyatt, he asked for his best friend- Aiden to pretend to be his girlfriend in exchange for paying his father's hospital bill.

I knew that my father did not like me since I was young. When I wanted to commit suicide to end the pain caused by my illness, he was celebrating another child’s birthday. He hated my mother and me alongside her. So, when I told him that I was sick, he did not believe me. “Is this your new tactic to get money from me?” No one believed that the daughter of the Powell family could die because she was too poor to pay the hospital fees. My father did not believe it either. However, when he saw my dead body, the famous actor who hated his daughter actually went insane.

By day, Don Pope is the untouchable king of Cross City’s financial empire. By night, he is something far darker—an infamous mafia don whose enemies vanish before dawn. Ethan Cole never intended to cross paths with a monster like him. One quiet night drive across the city turns into a nightmare when Ethan is kidnapped by masked men and thrown into an underground cage beneath the most luxurious mansion in Cross City—Don Pope’s estate. When the Don himself descends to inspect the prisoners his men captured, something unexpected happens. The moment Don Pope looks into Ethan’s eyes, he stops walking. He was supposed to pass the cage. Instead, he orders the others released… except for Ethan. What begins as cruel possession soon spirals into something neither of them expected. Don becomes obsessed with the fiery captive who refuses to bow to him. Ethan swears he would rather die than submit to the ruthless mafia lord. But obsession is a dangerous thing. What starts with violence slowly becomes dependence. Hatred becomes something far more complicated. And in a city built on betrayal, blood, and power, the line between captor and lover begins to blur. As war erupts between rival mafia families and secrets about Ethan’s past begin to surface, Don Pope must choose between his empire and the one man who refuses to belong to him. Because some loves are not meant to exist, but some destinies are written in the blood.

After three years with her lover, Lloyd Banks, the proud and powerful heir to the banks Empire, Nancy Drew gets the shock of her life when she discovers she is pregnant and the man tells her she was only a thing of pleasure and not fit to carry his child. Nancy begged to keep her child and begged to even be his secret Baby mama but he looked her straight in the eyes and told her the truth he had harbored for years. “The truth is, when I look at you, I don’t see the kind of woman fit to carry my child. Look, I don’t think I will ever see you as anything more than what you are right now, a thing for my pleasure.” Broken and dejected she escapes with her pregnancy and goes back to her father who kicks her out of the house with her unwanted pregnancy and she is forced to move to another country. When the government of the new country enforces a single child birth policy for new pregnancies, Nancy is forced to give up one of her children. Lloyd cried when he received a package that contained his son with a letter stating. [ I hope you find some warmth in your cold heart to care for our son.] The Cold hearted and Proud CEO vowed to find the mother of his child and make her his no matter what but he is unsuccessful for years. What happens when they meet years later and he learns that she actually gave birth to not just one but two children for him? Let’s go Find out in TWO FOR THE CEO.