Actually Funny Jokes For Adults

“Fuck—say my name when I’m inside you,” Drake’s voice was a dark growl against my ear, his hand pinning mine above the headboard. “Drake… oh God, harder—” I cried, my body arching into his relentless thrusts. “Not just Drake. Say what I am to you.” “My ex’s father,” I gasped, shame and desire tangling on my tongue. “That’s right, sweetheart. And now you’re mine.” It was supposed to be a reckless mistake. A reckless sex with a stranger after catching my boyfriend screwing my best friend. But the stranger wasn’t a stranger at all. He was Drake Humphrey. My ex-boyfriend’s father. Older. Filthy rich. Ruthlessly dominant. The man I should have run from. Instead, I let him own me. In his penthouse, on his desk, in his car. I let him ruin me with every touch. But what started as lust has become obsession. Drake doesn’t just want my body. He wants my heart. He wants me under his name, his control, his power. And when our secret erupts, the world around us catches fire. My ex wants revenge. His mother wants blood. His father wants me. And I can’t decide if I’ve been destroyed… or if I’ve finally come alive.

Sa kagustuhan ni Astrea na hindi madungisan ang pangalan nang pamilya niya sa nakaambang kahihiyan, dahil sa "last minute runaway" nang fiance niya na si Aiden, nakuha niyang mag renta nang magpapanggap para tumayo sa dulo nang altar. Pero hindi lang pala sa araw na iyon natatapos ang lahat, at mukhang balak silang paglaruan nang tadhana.

Xiamara Joy Orprecio is known habitue of contest, either pageantry or modeling. Everyone knows her. Everyone adores her passion and talent, reason why she don't have any problem in maintaining her self-esteem and cofidence. But just like a strong sound of applauses and cheers she have received, her

Archer has always known what is expected of him. He accepts to be betrothed to a woman, he doesn't know, for the sake of the kingdom. An alliance between the two kingdoms is needed to fight off the rebels. He goes to great lengths to win the affection of his betrothed. Adalia doesn't want to be an ornament. She wants to be a strong queen, who joins her army in battles. But she is a princess. The only thing expected of her is to be beautiful and reproduce one heir after another. Adalia goes to Archer's kingdom ready to accept her fate. But when she runs into Xander her childhood crush, she commits to marrying him instead of the future King.

In the third year of our marriage, my wife’s ex-boyfriend of eight years suddenly posted a picture on social media showing off a multi-million-dollar wedding house. His caption read: “Wow, got myself a huge villa, I’m the master of charming women!” I stared in shock at the picture, which showed my wife swiping her card at a sales office, and left a single comment: "?" A second later, my wife called to scold me. “I was just fulfilling a promise I made to him back when we were dating, buying him a house. Why are you getting mad at him?” “What? Are you really going to be so vicious as to force me to break my word?” That evening, her ex showed off another lavish post, this time flaunting a renovation bill worth hundreds of thousands. I knew it was a gift from my wife to please him. But by then, I no longer cared.

When struggling waitress Elira Cruz was forced into entering a contract marriage with cold, ruthless billionaire Caelan Ferrer, she thought she was sealing just another business deal: one year, no emotions, no strings. But behind that icy stare lay hurtful memories Elira unknowingly played a part in. Snowed in by her messy kindness, the man who swore never to love again slowly began to thaw. Secrets begin to unfold underneath. A hidden link ties them much closer than either one would have imagined. Will their fake marriage survive the truth...or will love become the price of revenge?

In my parents' hearts, there was always a "perfect son" who died too soon. I was just his flawed substitute, while my younger brother was their new hope. They pretended to be poor for 20 years, secretly funneling all their resources to him. While I was in the final stages of stomach cancer, writhing in pain, they were spending millions of dollars to build him a state-of-the-art study room. When the doctor told me to notify my family about hospital bills, I felt helpless, thinking they were just ordinary, broke workers. When my mom finally showed up at the hospital, she grabbed my hand, not out of concern. "Neville is under so much stress with his college entrance exams. Can you not die right now? He can't take it." My dad stood by, wearing a stern expression. "David was way more sensible than you."

My girlfriend keeps saying that she comes from a poor family, but she gives her childhood sweetheart a yacht on our anniversary. I text her to ask about this, but all she does is berate me. "Who do you think you are? How dare you stick your nose into my business! I'll give anyone whatever I want. My money, my call. Get lost!" Unbeknownst to her, I'm covered in blood on the other end of the line.

Their contract had expired a week ago and considering the fact that Miller's long term crush, Alexia was back from her six months trip, Miller decides to bring her back into the pack. Hurt and betrayed, Summer tries to reject him knowing she'd rather die than become his breeder, “I, Summer Dubios, reject…” Miller's cold voice cut her short instantly, “Summer! Are you out of your mind? You have no right to reject your mate! I’m not done with you yet. I alone have the right to reject you as my mate. Not until I am satisfied with the pleasure you bring, you're still my mate and you'll remain here till I have no use for you and that's final!”

The Falcon Ridge Series Book 1 Anna Riker: I have no patience for the military Security unit. I have a giant chip on my shoulder and it didn't help when one soldier almost gets himself killed and I have to save him. There's something about this soldier that gets under my skin. I don't want to find out, but the closer I get, the more I can't help myself. River Blake: I'm next in line to take over my pack. I joined the security unit over a year ago to appease my father. When he says I need my fated mate to get my title, yeah I'm angry. Until I see a woman, dressed in leather. She says our future together could never be, but I'll do everything i can to prove to her that she's for me and I'm for her. Michael Dorian: I know Im being used. I didn't mind at first, but now things have changed. When she meets some soldier, a rage boils in my gut. Like a powder keg ready to explode. I have to prove to Anna she's for me and only me. And I will. Even if I have commit treason and murder to do it.