Ah Bullshit Novels & Stories

"I'm like a human doormat! Why not walk all over me? Everyone else does." "I didn't mean it like that!" Alfie cried in a panic. Taking a giant step towards the fallen char, he watched with satisfaction as Alfie scrambled backwards, pedalling with his feet until he hit the book cabinet. "Being nice is a good thing," he went on, "You don't want to be a piece of shit like Jayce, do you? He's a waste of space, everyone knows it." "I'll tell him you said that," Sam sneered, raising an eyebrow.

' look. I shrugged at him while Bia continued babbling rubbish. "It will be nice if you would expel DumBuba from this company since she's very useless! Uhh, she makes me do all her work." She paused and placed a hand over her forehead and acted like she was very stressed about it. Neal shook his head while I sighed deeply. She is such a great liar. The thickness of her face to call Ate Buba stupid. Someone should really reward her for being the perfect villain of your life.

I moved to slam the door in his face, but a large palm halted its progress. "Oh no, you don't get to insult me and the flounce off in a huff, babe. I call bullshit." "I beg your pardon. Are you calling my feelings bullshit?" Oh 'jerk' was way to kind a word for the asshole standing in from of me. "I'm calling this whole 'I need space' routine bullshit." His voice was on the rise again. Luckily my neighbours worked the nightshift. "I'm saying this attempt at dating Zack, the boring as hell accountant, is bullshit. That guy will have you in a twin-set and pearls before you can blink and that isn't you."

“You keep telling yourself you don’t have a thing for me.” He puts me down and slaps my ass, hard. “Fuck Alexei, do you have to hit me so hard.” I grunt while rubbing my ass. “What, you have special healing abilities. I though your pain threshold also would have been improved, just wanted to test my theory.” He nonchalantly shrugs his shoulders. “Well, there’s your answer. Now quit playing with me.” I grunt.

And I knew that was Barbara, how could it be that he had a profile picture with her when they were supposed to have broken up and when he was supposed to be with me? -You're a liar! -I turned to him and threw the cell phone at him, he caught it before it landed on his face, "I hate you! -I grabbed a pillow as he looked at the picture. -Monique, this is not what it looks like," he tried to stop me, "Please listen to me," he seemed anxious now, anxious for me to believe him and listen to him, "I haven't even used F******k for months, that picture stayed there because I don't go on those things.

Fuck it all! This situation is seriously fucked up, and I am definitely fucked up. I know that I keep saying "fuck," and it's annoying, but what else can I say when everything's really fucked? If only I had realized how fucked up this situation would be before I let myself get carried away by lust and by the wonders of Layland's mouth, then I wouldn't be going crazy right now and feeling like total shit.

“But if you cαll thαt being α cowαrd‚ Άnnα… then fuck it.” “I’ll be the worst fucking bαstαrd you’ve ever met.”

“What the fuck happened to you? You look like you took a nap in hell. And your glasses…what happened to the one you got last week? Trust Mae to notice every tiny detail. I sighed, leaning my head against my locker. “Knox Ashford and his demons happened again.” “Is that why you look like you fought a tiger and barely made it out alive?” Her eyes sparkled as she leaned close. “Please tell me you finally grew the balls to stand up to him.” I rolled my eyes until I almost saw my brain. “I wish. Maybe you could do that if he were bullying you but I can’t say the same.”

He moves closer but I step away, creating a little distance between us. "Why can't people see that this is fùcking bullshit?" I cry. "The media is feeding them bullshit and they are eating it up like a spicy steak. Why the fùck would I steal my diamond dress and then damage it? That was my fùcking masterpiece! Why would I do that to myself? And why the fùck would they believe that I could do something like that to myself!" "Because they have brains the size of beans." He says and I laugh a little. "And also because people on the Internet are basically brailess sheep. They just follow other sheep blindly. We agreed that you wouldn't lose sleep over those kind of people?"