My Wife's Anniversary Gift: Another Man's Child
On my fifth year anniversary, my wife, Rachel Sutton, announces her pregnancy on her social media feed.
"After going through artificial insemination for the 39th time, I finally got pregnant with your child as I wished."
The accompanying photo features Rachel lacing fingers tightly with her first love, Damon Calloway.
I leave a like on the photo calmly. Then, I give them my blessings.
The next thing I know, Rachel calls me on the phone. She roars at me furiously, "Damon is diagnosed with cancer! What's wrong with me bearing a child for him? Garrett Whitaker, you're being too much right now!"
I reply coolly, "Then come back and file for a divorce. Once the divorce is through, you can go ahead and find yourself a husband who won't 'become too much.'"