Banana Jokes Novels & Stories

George Quinn brought his childhood sweetheart and their illegitimate son home. He said it was just a drunken mistake from seven years ago, and now he just wanted to make things right. Covering the boy's ears, he whispered to me, "Lucas is sensitive. Just say Emma is adopted to avoid upsetting him. Lily has struggled to raise him alone, and I owe her a proper title. In a few days, let's head to the courthouse for a divorce, but our daily life won't change." I didn't argue or fight. After enduring heartbreak and finalizing the divorce, I packed my things and left with my daughter. The butler urged George to persuade me to stay, but George dismissed him. "She is nearly 40 with a child in tow. Does she think another man will want her?" What he didn't know was that my long-lost first love came back last month. The man was still single, waiting for me all these years.

While they slice me apart, I desperately call my brother, Nathan Slade. He finally picks up as my consciousness starts to slip and answers in an annoyed voice, "What now?" "Nathan, help—" I don't get to finish before he cuts me off. "Can't you ever go a day without drama? Gemma's graduation is at the end of the month. Miss it, and I swear I'll kill you!" Then, he hangs up without a second thought. The agonizing pain swallows me whole, and my eyes close for good, tears still trailing down my cheeks. Well, good news, Nathan… You won't have to kill me because I'm already dead.

Freya Laurent returns to the Blackwood Pack after five years, eager to reunite with her adoptive family. But the moment Alpha Dane, the man who's been her protective brother since childhood sees her, his wolf claims her as his fated mate. ‎ ‎Caught between duty and desire, Dane fights his primal urges while Freya struggles with dreams and an inexplicable pull toward the one man she shouldn't want. When jealous warrior Selene allies with rival Alpha Viktor, their attacks awaken ancient powers within Freya. ‎ ‎She's not just human. She's the Moon Goddess's last descendant, and everyone wants her power. ‎ ‎Can love conquer blood? Or will destiny destroy them both?

Blurb The downpour washed the dark alleys of Ole Keating Village like Jupiter is wrathful towards the small town. Every time the lightning slashes the skies sending frightening thunders everywhere, the little boy’s strides become faster. “You’ve got nowhere to run, boy.” He harshly covered his ears just to get away from the taunting voice. The heavy rain somehow managed to wipe the blood from his body yet the pain unrelenting to grow. He fell on his knees resulting in another painful and ugly scratch to bleed. He looks like a beaten rag. He hasn’t eaten for days and the fearsome encounter he just escapes didn’t guarantee his safety. Even limping, he tried to get on his feet just to stumble and fall on the cold, hard ground again. A loud sound of the honking car filled his ears as the blinding light approaches closer. Surrendering, he lied flat on the ground wishing the pain finally ends. Sounds of boots slapping the water from the road come into his senses but he’s too weak to care. Someone’s checking on him but all that he can think of right now is the girl she left alone in the old warehouse. “S-save her…” he mumbled, tasting blood in his mouth, “Please save her.” The darkness pulled him and he finally gave in.

On our wedding night, Zach received a phone call and left my side. From then on, I knew that all of my efforts over the years had gone to waste. After all, the person he loved had returned. “Cassia, let’s get a divorce.” “But we just got married two days ago.” “You know that I don’t love you, and I never will.”

SUBMITTING TO MY STEP BROTHERS "Nicole meet your stepbrothers and .......", I didn't hear the next words when my eyes fall on the two men already seated. I found myself momentarily frozen at what I was seeing. Was i dreaming or I wasn't? What the hell is wrong with my step father’s sons. They are all f**king.... **** "Do you want it?", Before I could reply him, my gaze accidentally moved down then I saw it.....his bulge was huge even though it was flaccid. Was I turning him on? Just like I did to his brother, Alexander. My breath hitched as he stepped closer to me, his chest coming into view, closer to my face, "I think its too late to eat the cake," He rasped as I looked up. His hand extended above me but his forest green eyes held mine, they became darker as if time had stood still. Right now, I needed a saviour. I noticed that Alexander has ocean blue eyes then here is his brother with ...... my goodness! Speechless, I moved my gaze to his Adam's apple, which bobbed as he swallowed. "If the banana is all you wanted. Then have a good night step sis" He moved away, smirking and then he turned around. My eyes landed on his ass. I snapped out of quickly it then shook my head. Holy hell! I was still holding the banana in my hand in disbelief. Was that a dream?

Once in a while, in the middle of life, love gives us a fairytale.And some fairytale love stories are completely unexpected and thus more memorable.No one expected the class president and the leader of Trouble Triggers to even talk about anything but notes and pencils. But then fate's a bitch and loves to meddle!Their life changes drastically when the good girl- Joanna Williams has to tutor the bad boy- Bryan Cooper.Along with the tutoring comes constant fun, too much bickering, lame jokes, scary sarcasm, idiotic friends, too many unknown emotions, jungles in tummy, bucket lists, unheard secrets and haunting pasts.Maybe some fairytales don't have a happy ending... or do they?

What if your brother's best friend became your worst distraction? Klaus, with his chiseled charm, piercing gaze, and reckless smile, was that distraction for Morticia. •••••••••• Morticia Addams had always noticed Klaus, her brother's best friend, since they were young. He was the ultimate forbidden fantasy. The man who could have anyone, and usually did. But she? She was an off-limits--an innocent nerd who lives in the shadow of her protective brother. Or at least, that’s what she told herself. She had always thought she stood no chance with Klaus because he's a notorious womanizer who chased everything in a skirt. For years, she watched as Klaus broke hearts and left women craving more of his reckless love and lust. But when she got into the same college as him, everything changed... Then, she discovered a different side of him - fierce, primal, and unapologetic. ~~~~~~~~~~ "Wha—is that a banana in your pocket?" Her gaze dropped on the bulge between his legs. He moved closer, trapping her against the wall. "Yeah. Would you like to eat it up?" His eyes drifted to her chest, lingering on her hardened nipples. "I wouldn't mind."

“You’re weak and ugly!” “Stop acting like you’re one of us. You disgust me!” ***In high school, Tabitha was fat and the constant target of the quadruplet brothers' cruel jokes and bullying. They were her living nightmare. After dropping out, she left the werewolf school behind and enrolled in a human university, where she slimmed down. The quadruplets were raised by their father with strict military discipline, shaping them into rebellious and unruly young alphas. Five years later, Tabitha and the quadruplet brothers met again, because her mother married their father. Now, Tabitha is forced to live under the same roof as the four Navy Alpha bullies. They quickly recognize her and are stunned by how beautiful she’s become.

"She is not property. She is my mate and you will not mention 'her' like you're talking about a burnt banana peel."   My breath hitched.   No one had ever defended me like that.   Not once.   Kael glanced over his shoulder at me, his expression softer now, protective. "But it’s her choice. Not mine. Not yours." .......................................................... At just eighteen, Meeva Vale thought that she had found her fairytale ending, an Omega chosen as Luna by the Alpha of the Sinhound Pack. But six years later, her marriage to Alpha Jared has left her silenced, sacrificed, and stranded in a life that no longer feels her own.   When the powerful Alpha Kael Edgar of the Brawnstorm Pack storms into her territory to confront Jared over a broken trading treaty, everything changes. With a single glance, the bond between Kael and Meeva ignites. But Meeva is already claimed, married even.   But Kael doesn’t give two fucks.   He lays siege to the pack and takes Meeva with him, officially staking his claim as her mate. Her wolf betrays her heart, surrendering to him long before she does. What begins as a sinful passion quickly transforms into a deeper whirlpool.   With a dark sorcerer on their tail, their story is about to take a very unnerving turn.