Booktok Is Cringe Novels & Stories

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he said tiredly, “if you would please go and get the third edition of Bozkurt’s Second Introduction to Basic Social Forces Governing Modern Packs from the shelf.” I blinked. Well, that was one of the un-sexiest things I’d ever heard someone say. “Uh. Bozkurt. Right.” Standing, my vision went blurry for a moment, like it sometimes did back at the orphanage when there hadn’t been anything to eat that day. I shook off the grey spots and walked a little shakily to the built-in shelves. Bozkurt, Bozkurt… Vincent alphabetised his own library, because of course he did. I finally spotted the world’s least exciting textbook and shimmied it out from the shelf.

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“After one shirtless vision?” “He glowed,” I whispered. “So does fungus. That don’t make it mate material.” “Did you see those abs? I could use them to cut bread.” “Girl, I know you’re lonely, but let’s not go feral over abs and cheekbones.” “I’m not going feral. I’m going cautiously enchanted. There’s a difference.” “You drooled.” “I was hydrated.” But… The book flopped open on its own. Magic pulsed from the pages like a heartbeat.

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Klark, ‘Tribid Greed’ by Steve Reynolds, and a lot of other books. One by one Trisha returned all the books she'd picked. When she was beginning to get tired and unmotivated, the corner of her eyes perceived a strange book on a shelf not too far from where she was. Its spines were tattered and appeared like spiky wires beneath the poor lighting.

I begin scanning titles desperately, hoping to find something useful. Maybe something like: How To Stop Embarrassing Yourself By Flirting With Straight Men. Or perhaps: Self-Control: Please, For The Love Of God. Nothing. Not even close. I feel deeply offended. There is absolutely a market for those books. I cannot possibly be the only person suffering from this very specific life crisis. Rachel drifts down the aisle behind me, pretending to browse

“We thought your… stalker might’ve gotten to you.” I snort, attempting humor that tastes bitter in my mouth. “Ha-ha.” I bend to grab the books I tossed and shove them back into the shelf, wanting to erase their very existence. Tempting Him and Kamasutra: Teacher’s Edition. My cheeks burn. I never, ever want to see them again. That was… catastrophic. Humiliating. Surely, that couldn't have gone any worse. “You okay?” Sam asks, tilting his head, confusion and concern mixing in his eyes.

“Seriously, Book, this place is almost as old as you. Why don’t you use some of that money you used to steal and buy a nice place? Maybe one without a fucking roach infestation.” The critter unleashed a fresh memory, Zoe’s sleepy voice confessing her lie of his occupation. His stomach flipped, his throat thankful he had nothing left in his stomach to expel. Booker’s voice snapped his from his thoughts. “Listen here, kid. Money’s meant to be spent on fine women, fine whiskey and some good ol’ fashioned drugs. Why would I spent good money on a nice place? This works just fine.” Kicking the front door shut, Booker dawdled to the sofa, falling into it. It creaked almost as loudly as he did.