Clever No Soliciting Sign Funny

Over the Fourth of July weekend, I took my boyfriend's sister to his flashy new influencer hub. Fresh off brain surgery, Benedetta Griffin needed a break from her recovery, and I hoped the trip would lift her spirits. In the hub, a streamer was hawking a face cream like a carnival barker. "Listen, fam! The boss lady is slashing prices. Get this $3,800 cream for just $398 today!" Benedetta tugged my sleeve. "That cream is bad news." She'd interned at the FDA last summer and could spot a scam from a mile away. "It's packed with steroids. Long-term use will ruin your skin." Driven by her sense of justice, she marched up to the streamer. "You can't sell this unlicensed junk. The steroids exceed legal limits. Pull it from the shelves." Morgan Lamb froze, but then her fake smile twisted into a scowl. "Who the hell are you to trash my product?" Benedetta didn't back down. "You're scamming people, and you know it." Morgan planted her hands on her hips. "I'm the boss lady here. How dare you slander my brand? Nobody leaves until you cough up $500,000 for damages." "Boss lady?" My stomach churned. My boyfriend's sudden venture into the streaming industry now made sense. He was sinking money into this hub to bankroll his lover. I fumbled for my phone to call him, but Morgan was faster. "Babe, get to the hub. Two haters crashed the party, trying to tank our business."

Lady-Luna Millie is a pregnant Half-Faye - Half-Human woman faces a heart-wrenching decision. Her husband, eager to be with his so-called second chance mate, signs their divorce papers, leaving her in a whirlwind of political scrutiny. As she risks everything to save her unborn children from the chosen mate bond, fate intervenes. Luis, her soon-to-be ex-husband’s uncle, proposes to her on live TV, turning her life upside down. Will Millie return to her secret life as an heiress of Moonstone Grove, or embrace the proposal of her now ex-husband's rich Elder Vampire Oskar? Perhaps someone else will win her heart as she navigates the challenge of divorcing the powerful Lord Alpha vampire of the second-largest vampire colony in the US. Get ready for a rollercoaster of romance, betrayal, and suspense as we follow Lady-Luna Millie as she takes down the all-powerful Lord-Alpha Starlyn striking back and claiming what is hers.

Who knew "I DO" came with a price tag? *** Charlene, or Charlie, was an orphan. She had lived jumping from one foster home to another, where people told her what to do, what she could be and not, and what she deserved, which was not much. At 18, she said enough. She pursued a career as a model, taking her life into her own hands. At 20, she met Collin, a wealthy CEO who promised to marry her. She thought her dreams were finally coming true. But like everything else in her life, her fiancée ended up being a disappointment as she caught him cheating, leaving her with a broken heart and a career in shambles. Desperate to get her life back on track, she accepted an unusual job proposal. She agreed to marry the son of the man she saved by accident. In exchange, she would receive substantial compensation. Yeah! Why not? Right? It was not as if she had to fall in love with him. It was a mere business transaction where she had to act as his wife. Besides, love was overrated anyway. Money was what made the world go round. It was the immediate solution to her problems. That was where Isaac Saunders came into the picture. He was her unwilling groom, forced by his father to marry her. He was the sole heir of his family's billion-dollar company. But he had to marry the woman of his father's choosing to inherit his father's legacy. So, how would this arrangement even work when he only saw her as another gold digger? On the other hand, she only looked at this marriage as a contractual transaction. What then? How would these two deal with their new living arrangement, staying in the same house and playing husband and wife?

Fedora Smith was done with love. Finished. Buried. Betrayal had ripped out her heart and torched it—her boyfriend of four years and her best friend of twenty-five caught pants down on the very anniversary sheets she gifted him. And their excuses? “You’re not attractive anymore.” “You took too long to marry him.” Fine. If love was a game, she was rewriting the rules. Now, she runs The Bridal Fix, an elite agency providing fake marriages for a steep price—rent-a-bride services for men needing to fool their families, secure an inheritance, or stage the perfect breakup. Fifteen weddings, fifteen divorces—no strings, no mess. Just business. Until Judah Carlstone. He hires her like the rest—one contract, one wedding, one payday. But Judah asks too many questions. Looks at her too long. And when he smirks and says— "Tell me, Fedora… how does it feel to say ‘I do’ and not mean it?" For the first time in years, she has no answer. Because this was never supposed to feel real.

I chase my six-year-old daughter out of the house on a cold winter day. I cut her new clothes to pieces and dirty her dainty little face with mud. Then, I give her all my savings. She looks at me tearfully and reaches out for me, wanting me to hold her. However, I harden my heart and push her away, saying, "Leave! Go to Bowen Group and look for their CEO, Logan Bowen. Show him my death certificate and your DNA test—he'll take you in." She sobs while looking at me. "Don't you want me anymore, Mommy? Let's go look for Daddy together." After a brief silence, I say, "I can't go with you. I lied to him back then to have you." Yes, I'm a liar. I orchestrated everything from meeting Logan, dating him, to ultimately leaving him with his child in my womb. Even the death certificate I've given my daughter is fake. From beginning to end, I've lied to him about everything except our daughter.

Despite a decade of marriage, Simon never once shared my bed, claiming that he had pledged himself to ascetic practices and that it was beneath him. I thought that he suffered from some shameful ailment and guarded his secret like a devoted fool, until my birthday, when I came home to find him entangled with a brothel worker before the floor-length mirror. When I lunged forward in rage, he drove a shard of that broken mirror straight through my heart. When I awoke, I was gripping my phone, its screen illuminating a message Simon had just sent: [I’ll still give you a lavish wedding, but the marriage certificate? That belongs to her.]

Devon menyodorkan surat cerai tepat ke depan muka Rosa. Pria itu tak terlihat main-main. Pada akhirnya pernikahan yang mereka lalui tidak berhasil meskipun Rosa sudah mencoba sebisanya. Rosa menginginkan Devon. Sangat membutuhkan kekuasaan keluarga Wijaya yang berada di genggaman Devon. Dia tak bisa pergi, tak akan mau. Ketika Rosa tengah memutar otak untuk menunda perceraian ini, tiba-tiba saja petir menyambar Devon secepat kilat! "Ja-jangan mati!!!! Ambulans! Tolong, siapa saja panggil ambulans!" jerit Rosa dengan derai air mata bercucuran. Sementara itu, Devon bergeming di tempatnya. Asap-asap hitam mengepul keluar dari sekujur tubuh dan perickan listrik seperti melompat-lompat di atasnya. Namun bukan itu yang penting. Sebuah suara melengking yang pria itu kenal jelas, merasuki kepalanya dengan kurang ajar. Devon bisa mendengar suara isi pikiran Rosa tanpa sepengetahuan wanita itu. Dan darahnya dibuat mendidih. 'Siapa bilang laki-laki ganteng di dunia ini cuma Devon? Cuih! Manusia macam dia mending bertapa di gunung jadi biksu. Percuma dikasih istri secantik aku kalo matanya nggak dipake,' ujar Rosa dalam hati. Gigi Devon bergemeletuk menahan amarah. "ROSA!!"

Two years after we marry, my husband moves his sister and her family into our marital home. The four of them settle down and refuse to leave. So, I quit both my jobs. I laze around at home all day and splurge on various things. I have so many parcels delivered that they pile up by the door. Occasionally, I ask my husband and his sister for allowance. When the management office sends someone to chase for our maintenance fee, my husband breaks down so loudly that everyone in the building can hear him. He asks me whether I've lost my mind—who will support the family if I don't work? How will we survive without money? Am I going to allow our family to starve? So, it turns out he does know that we'll starve without anyone generating income. Why does he and his sister stay at home and plot to take away all my money, then?

I was reborn back to 1975, when the child in my womb was three months old. I did not tell anyone and quietly had an abortion. However, I still wrapped cotton around my belly every day, pretending the baby was still there. In my past life, my husband Declan Huxley's childhood sweetheart Jane Patton and I gave birth on the same day. She had a healthy, ordinary baby boy. But my child looked nothing like us—he was mixed-race, with features of the Valorian people. Declan and I were both locals, so there was no way our son could look like this. Enraged, Declan scolded me in front of everyone, accusing me of cheating on him and having a disgraceful affair with a Valorian. No matter how many times I explained, no one believed me, and I became the shameful woman everyone pointed at. Worse still, Declan reported me and handed in some foreign letters he found at home, which led to me being taken by federal agents and sentenced as a spy. I spent ten years in prison, and when I finally walked out, I was nothing but skin and bones. Meanwhile, Declan had climbed the ranks for his so-called loyalty to the country. He held Jane's hand and brought along my real son, Seth Huxley, then threw 500 dollars at me like it was charity. He said, "Back then, Jane was accidentally deceived by someone else and gave birth to that brat. Unlike you, she has a gentle nature and couldn't endure hardship, so I had no choice but to switch your children. "This money is payment for your ten years and your reputation. You have a criminal record, and I already filed for divorce long ago to be with Jane. Seth also thinks you're not worthy of me, so you better take care of yourself." Seth also looked at me with disgust. "Mommy Jane treats me very well, and she's not like you; she's never been to prison. I don't want a mother like you!" When I learned the truth, the fury was so overwhelming that I had a stroke and died in despair. In this new life, I want to see how they plan to scheme against me when the child is already gone.

Cold and proud to all, Beamon Slade, Northarch's strongest Alpha, reserves his gentleness solely for me. Everyone knows that I'm his Luna. But today, his first love is infected with deadly wolfsbane and on the brink of death. He hands me a herbal pill that can seal memories and temporarily remove the mate mark. "Eiro won't last another three days, Swan. "Could you give me three days to fulfill her dream of becoming a Luna through a symbolic marking ceremony? I won't hurt you. This pill temporarily severs the bond and makes you forget me. "When the ceremony ends three days later, take the antidote and you'll remember everything. We'll get back together." Looking at his calm, gentle expression, I silently swallow the pill without hesitation. He has no idea, but I crafted the pill with my own hands. There's no such thing as an antidote. Three days from now, I'll completely forget him. All our embraces, vows, marks, and his past gentleness will vanish with the wind.