Clever No Soliciting Sign Funny

By accident, I stumbled upon my husband's secret. There were cameras covering every corner of our house, but I stayed silent and pretended not to know about them. One day, I faked leaving home and hid in the closet, only to hear my husband fooling around with his mistress. Jared's breath was short from exertion. "Faster. We have less than 20 minutes before Vanessa gets back." His mistress giggled. "Relax. Her eyesight is terrible." Jared growled. "Shut up! Vanessa is my wife. Say another thing about her, and I'll throw you out!" What he didn't know was that my eyesight had been cured. My vision was as sharp as anyone else's. I stepped out of the closet with a choked sob and called my brother. "I'll go to Murica."

It's not what you think. Two social worlds collide with words, feelings, behaviours and ideas most unexpected to bring an even more unpredictable end. Lacey Atkins leaves school for a tear and comes back wanting nothing more than to be left alone. Alone in a classroom, Tom Wade sees Lacey and soon comes to want nothing more than to be with her. Her weird and unusual ways all make him the more curious and drawn in.

I was the sole front desk clerk at a haunted hotel. Welcoming players, checking in on the bosses’ quarters, and slacking off a bit were all part of the job. At least, that was what I thought. It turned out my days were far from ordinary. A blood-drenched little girl in a tattered red dress kept ringing the service bell. Her eerie voice echoed, “Miss, why didn’t you come play with me?” A creepy black cat with glowing eyes wouldn’t stop meowing and rubbing against my legs. And then there was the old woman with claws like knives, cheerfully knitting me a sweater… out of players’ skin. One day, I took a day off to care for my sick mother. That was my biggest mistake. The entire game instance erupted in chaos. Bosses interrogated players, demanding to know where their precious front desk clerk had gone. “Did she abandon us? Is she never coming back?” I ran. They chased. But no matter how fast I fled, their grip on me only tightened. In the end, escape wasn’t an option.

When my son was born, I noticed a small, round birthmark on his arm. But the weird thing? By the time I opened my eyes again after giving birth, it was gone. I figured maybe I'd imagined it. That is, until the baby shower. My brother-in-law's son, born the same day as mine, had the exact same birthmark. Clear as day. That's when it hit me. I didn't say a word, though. Not then. I waited. Eighteen years later, at my son's college acceptance party, my brother-in-law stood up and dropped the truth bomb: the "amazing" kid I'd raised was theirs. I just smiled and invited him and his wife to take their "rightful" seats at the table.

My grandmother only knows how to draw one thing—infants. They're ugly, but people line up to buy the paintings. I watch as she takes those women into unlit rooms. Then, their bloodcurdling screams will ring out. Oddly enough, they always thank my grandmother when they're leaving. One day, I finally find out what exactly my grandmother paints. I discover the truth when I see an infant crawl out of one of the women's bellies—it looks just like the one my grandmother has painted.

Lavish London mansions. A hand-painted Rolls-Royce. And eight dead friends. For the British fixer Robbie Chase, working for the Russian's President most vocal critic meant stunning perks – but also constant danger. His gruesome death is one of 14 that retired British Agent QUINTUS NOONE has linked to Russia – but the UK police shut down every last case. QUINTUS NOONE'S investigation reveals the full story of a ring of death on British soil that the government has ignored.

Contract marriage. (No string attached) Setting_ Los Angeles. Modern billionaire Romance. Proloque. Aryan Mahir, the CEO of A&M investment company who's produce the best quality brands in the whole Los Angeles, he can be describe to be cold hearted, grumpy, proud and egocentric. In order to maintain his status in the business world, he was to get married immediately, in order to get the biggest contract his rival companies are eyeing. He was set to find a wife as soon as possible. * Mia Johnson, a pity poor lady who suffered to make ends meet, she goes above and beyond just to send her only surviving brother to school, she lost her parents in a car accident, she grew up having almost everything in life, she lived a comfortable life until the world crashed around her and her parents was involved in a car accident that took thier lives, her uncle snatched away everything her parents owned leaving them with no money, and not even a shelter to live in. Everything gets worse when her brother fall very ill and needed an urgent brain tumor surgery, having no money, she tried to begged her uncle to at least help her brother but he threw her out of his house. Wandering around the lonely Street of Los Angeles, she bumped into a billionaire who happened to change her life forever. What happened when Aryan Mahir asked Mia to marry him for four months. For her to save her brother, she had to agree to the contract marriage, loveless marriage to a complete arrogant jerk. Will they love each other or their marriage will end immediately after the contract expires. *

Everyone in the social circle of Kingsford said I was nothing more than a lapdog raised by Charles Mankin. I was always at his beck and call. I did every filthy, ludicrous thing for him under the sun. When he street raced, I rode shotgun. When he drank himself senseless, I made him hangover soup. When he chased girls, I prepared protection for them. Over time, everyone knew: Charles had a dog who never ran, never bit back, no matter how hard he kicked. They all said I must be madly in love with him. Even Charles started to believe it. So he pushed further, more freely, more cruelly, crossing lines as if they never existed. Then came my twenty-fifth birthday. He, in a rare stroke of mercy, said he'd celebrate it with me. But instead, what he got was the news that I was leaving the country. He went berserk, charging through the airport like a man possessed. I peeled his fingers off my wrist one by one, smiling like I'd never been happier. "Don't be stupid," I told him, still smiling. "That was never love." That night, Charles smashed apart his family home like a rabid dog.

The day before New Year's, my younger brother announced he was bringing his girlfriend home for dinner. Excited, I drove my new car to pick them up, taking my daughter along with me. However, as soon as his girlfriend got in the car, her face darkened. "Henry, you didn't tell me your sister was staying at your place—and with a kid!" she snapped. I frowned and was about to explain when my brother quickly interjected, "She's not staying. After dropping us off, she'll be heading to a hotel." Only then did his girlfriend's expression ease. I swallowed my discomfort and asked my brother what he was planning. He leaned in with a conspiratorial grin and said, "Sis, don't cause any trouble for me, okay? My girlfriend is the daughter of the Cromwell Group's CEO!" My eyes widened in shock. Was not the Cromwell Group the same company my ex-husband had just handed over to me as part of our divorce settlement?

I need to drive to and from work due to a change in my job scope. However, my father-in-law hoards my car and refuses to return it. My husband stands up for him. "How can you be so materialistic? So what if you have to take an electric scooter to work?" So, I sell the car. My husband points at me and snaps, "What right do you have to sell Dad's car?" I look at him calmly. "I've sold the one you drive too."