Crazy Hilarious Quotes Funny

“You dare to think of another man in my presence?” The Alpha growled with a burning desire in his eyes. He glowered at Lavinia whose hands were tied. “What does that man have that I don’t? That filthy vampire, you think he’s going to save you?” His hands ran through her bare skin, sending shivers to her spine. “Please, leave me alone,” Lavinia begged in desperation. Tears welled up in her eyes. “Then be mine, Lavinia.” He leaned closer to her. His breath fanned her face. “I’ll make you the happiest woman alive.” Lavinia shook her head. She pursed her lips while watching the man in front of her. He may be a great man with power but her heart longed for someone else. “No. You’re not him… You’re not Sebastian.” "We had an unspoken deal: He gave me warmth, colors, and lies. In return, he asked for my blood when he's thirsty, my body when he's cold and my heart when he's bored. The funny part is, I still think it's quite a bargain." - Lavinia de Llava

Book two of the Alpha's Phoenix mate! Melissa is a simple illiterate human village girl who dreams of going to school and becoming an architectural designer but her dreams get shattered when she is forced to marry a man five times her age. She finds a way to get out of the marriage and with the help of Kaira, goes to a different country where she meets Dean. Dean is the alpha of Black phantom pack who's been waiting to find his mate but after finally finding her, he gets shattered when he realises that she not only is an innocent little girl but also a human who isn't interested in love

When I have a pen in my hand and paper before me, I think I want to write something to cast every despair in my pathetic life away. I have a figure of a depressed guy whose fate is too much: saving the world. He is not stupid nor even smart, he is not ugly nor even good looking. He is just a nijikon (A person who loves an anime character more than the real one) like me. He once thought to give up on life, but an event changes his life. I'm sure you guys start guessing how the story goes, but too bad, this one is different than the others.

Alpha Kane imprisons Amy in his dungeon to soften her up for questioning after her brother, Jake, abducts his sister, Lisa. But she proves stubborn and he enslaves her, hoping this will make her more compliant. Kane is attracted to the dark-haired she-wolf from a rival pack, recently absorbed by his own, even though he has found his Luna and mate, Selene. But Amy is not what she seems, and the Alpha also has a hidden agenda. Working together to right a centuries old wrong, the pair begin to question everything they have been taught to believe. Will pack hierarchy ever be the same again?

On the day she went to surprise her sister with a gift for her new born baby, Diamond received the most shocking surprise of her life. She discovered her husband, Lennox Winthrop was the father of the baby and as if that isn’t enough, he laid the blames on her for being unable to bear him a child. Even her own family, laid the blames on her. Devastated, Diamond divorce her husband and left the city. However, she left with A baby growing inside of her, belonging to her ex-husband. Well turned out they were triplets years later. All she wanted after their Forster father died, was to live a single happy life with her babies but her crazy boys had other plans. They pops up a husband to her one evening and he turns out to be someone she never expected to meet again..

Blake: "You think stalkers just watch? That’s cute." His dark chuckle sends a shiver down your spine. "You’re in for a real surprise." Demitri: "When I speak, people obey. It’s that simple. Even you won’t say no to me." Lucas: "Killing isn’t the thrill—it’s the build-up, the precision, the art in it. How can’t you see that?" When a dark romance author ventures onto the dark web in search of real-life inspiration, she makes a daring request: to shadow a stalker, a serial killer, and the mafia’s Don for a week to better understand their worlds. What starts as research for her latest novel quickly turns into something far more dangerous. Blake, the obsessive stalker, Demitri, the commanding mafia Don, and Lucas, the twisted killer, each agree to let her into their lives—but none of them plan to let her go. Now, the author finds herself not just writing a dark romance, but living it, as all three men decide they want her for themselves. The question isn’t just how she’ll escape—but which one of them will claim her first.

Lydia and Cornelius have never seen eye to eye but what happens when a case of fake dating brings them together?

I suffer from extreme mental illness. My sister, Ava Monroe, became a facial model to earn money for my expensive medical treatment. She was 5’3” tall but was noticed because of her beauty by a wealthy young man by the name of Dominic Pierce with a leg obsession. He imprisoned her. “This is the most beautiful face I’ve ever seen. If only your legs were a bit longer, I’d die with a smile.” Ava was forced to have leg-lengthening surgery. After the operation, her legs began to rot. Dominic found her disgusting and locked her in the basement. He tortured her until she died. I got kicked out of the mental health institute because I could not pay the medical fees. I found Dominic surrounded by beautiful women with long legs. “Those are the prettiest legs I’ve ever seen. If only your face were a little cuter, I’d die with a smile!” I pointed to the painting of Ava and scoffed, “What if I become her?”

"Remember the most important rule, don't get caught." *** I try to keep my expression neutral and give nothing away in my eyes, Eli is a smart man, smarter than he lets on and will know if something is different about me, "Everyone change, Eli, you definitely aren't the man you were when we first met, but the question is if the change is for the better or the worse." His hand reaches over the table and take mine in the gloves and though there is a barrier between our hands his touch is felt and the reaction sent to the rest of my body. "I love you, Anna and that's not going to change, but I have to admit that I like this side of you more. However, I am contented with whatever I get as long as I get to have you." These words are the words any woman wants to hear their man tell them and it is almost perfect to my ears... almost because I am not Anna...

“Daddy… Fuck me daddy… I know daddy wants my pussy…. Yeah daddy harder… Oh..” I moaned tightly, biting my bottom lips. “So close.” I whispered, twirling my other hand on my breast, pinching and swirling my thumb against my dark buds. It was fucking sweet having pleasuring myself but I wondered what it would actually feel like having daddy’s cock inside of me instead. My eyes had immediately seized upward, and my hues widened with shock, snapping at the sight of my father figure who stood unwavering at the door. My heart skipped a beat that I swallowed harshly having pushed the words out my mouth. “Daddy….” my eyes leaned on him, watching as his dark shadow loomed further inside my room, and he pushed the door closed from behind with my breath which had halted. My leg involuntarily squeezed themselves to together, and another pleasure weaved its way into my body, maybe it was actually due to shock. What was he fucking doing here? “Princess where you fantasizing about me?” *** Roses weren’t red, neither were violent blue to me, all I wanted was pleasure but it all went too far….. The moment I saw how gracious my stepdad appeared, I had made it my mission to seduce him. Unfortunately what I didn’t know was that I was a naïve nineteen years old who was being used. He turned to a monster, and he made it his own life mission to torment my existence.