Dark Humor Dad Jokes

"Will you Marry me, Sunshine?" He proposed her sitting on his knees, she nodded to him. He smiled and slipped the ring in her finger. He looked behind her, her parents and her brother with teary eyes standing there on the gunpoint by his man. Brandon Rodriguez, another name of death and danger. Everyone fears him. He is a cold-hearted mafia boss. He has no mercy for anyone. Claire Brown, a definition of sweetness and innocence, a beautiful and pure soul who loves everyone. She can't stand violence and blood. One fateful night everything changed when the king of darkness meet the innocent girl under different situations.?

The Dark Below is a steam-punk/fantasy world filled with the darkness that rests beneath a wavering tide. Generations ago, Gods from the depths below rose from the black seas and in doing so, caused a great flood that would have destroyed all of humanity if it was not for the ingenuity of survival. Living among The Dark Below has come to pass, but now four warriors must come together in hopes of forging a brighter future.

When Meave Delaney's first private dance at a strip club, leads her to a man who questions her choice of profession, the last thing she expected was to see him again, that too, as her boss in her day job. Him, Hunted by a past that seemed to chase him no matter how far he ran, he is sinking further into a place he knew would be difficult to crawl out of. Her, Growing up too fast sure had its effects, with a father who wishes to kick the bucket more than anything in the world, she's falling into the very life she fought to stay away from. Dark, There's one thing the darkness promised ... No expectations. Sometimes passion and love are all we need to stop ourselves from driving into that dark hole, but sometimes, passion and love pulls you further into it. But for Meave and Cohen, it was just Him, Her & Dark.

In the conflicting and contradicting world of the Royals lie misunderstandings and unforeseen fates. The battle for the throne and love thrives amongst The true blood of Royalty. What would happen when the normal life of a nerd mixes up with the world of the wealthy and powerful? Carolyn herdes is an unfortunate lady unlucky with love and an average citizen who accidentally fell into the hands of the hottest and rudest stranger she had ever met her entire life which made her question her entire being. (Nolan Armstrong). Infuriated by his arrogance, she fled but was brought back when her life was somehow intertwined with his. What will happen when she finds out that the man her body craved was the imperial ruler of the East? Will he accept this weird woman? Would she belong in his world?

"Did you think you could run away from me? is that it, Cat?" Ace asked, his hand tightening around her neck at every seconds. Catherine gasped her hand resting on Ace's as she fought to tear his hand off her. "I asked you a question, kitten. Did you think you could run away from me?" he questioned yet again, this time his voice was so gently that it sent shivers down her spine. Ace doesn't need to shout to show off his dominant bully side, he was like a predator, setting his trap quietly and killing cruelly. "I....I...I never tried to run, Ace. I won't try it ever." She gasped out, Ace smirked and brought her face closer to his. "That's right, Catherine. You are for me, mine to use however I please!" he said and slammed his lips on hers. *A dark highschool novel*

Clara life changes after accidentally catches the untouchable hotel heir, Kiran, in his darkest moment at a VIP club, a misunderstood camera flash turns her life into a nightmare. Now, forced by Kiran’s vengeful aunt to work as a spy in his mansion, Clara is trapped in a deadly game of corporate cat-and-mouse. She is the only one who knows the cold Ceo secret addiction, but as she uncovers the grief behind his frozen heart, she must decide: will she destroy him to save her family, or protect the man who has become her most dangerous obsession?

After Rory was betrayed by her ex-boyfriend, in a moment of impulse and rebellion, she sought revenge through a one-night stand with a stranger, only to wake up and discover that the man was her best friend Needy's father. Caught in a mix of embarrassment and turmoil, she thought it was a one-night stand…, until he turned out to be her new professor. It was said that Scott never had second sex with the same girl. But he wanted Rory every night. Their forbidden relationship was full of danger and excitement, and then Rory’s mother arrived to set off yet another bomb.... Yearning for My Friend’s Dad is created by Amelie Bergen, an eGlobal Creative Publishing signed author.

ೋღ🌹ღೋ Rose has gone her whole life being shadowed by three very protective brothers who have rules she must follow. And she did... until one night when she finds herself alone in the streets and she's attacked by a man with fangs. She barely manages to escape but even so, soon after her life becomes a living nightmare.

His mouth claimed hers with a hunger he’d clearly been holding back for years, tongue sliding deep, slow, possessive. Large hands mapped her body like he’d memorized it from stolen glances—cupping her breasts through her thin top, thumbs circling her nipples until they ached and peaked. “You’ve been driving me crazy,” he rasped against her throat, teeth grazing the sensitive skin. “Every time you walked through that door in those little sundresses…” He backed her against the wall, one thigh pressing firmly between hers so she could grind down on the hard ridge of him. Melanie whimpered, already soaked, hips rolling shamelessly. Marcus groaned approval, fingers slipping beneath her skirt to find her drenched panties. “Fuck, sweetheart,” he breathed, stroking her clit through the lace in slow, deliberate circles. “So wet for me already. Been thinking about this?” “Yes—God, yes,” she gasped, nails digging into his shoulders. ********** She knew it was wrong, craving her best friend’s father, but it was a sin she was willing to indulge in... damn the consequences, even if that includes a heartbreak.

It’s Monday and my first day of my new school. I drive my car around to where everyone else is parked, so I find myself a parking spot. Then I find the front office and go in and get my schedule. My first class is math, so I walk into the room and I’m the first one in there so I walk up to the teacher and hand him my paper to sign that I have to take back to the front office this afternoon. “Hello Miss. Billie Green I’m Mrs. Smart. It’s very nice to meet you.” The math teacher says, then sings the paper. You can go find yourself a set. I would try to find one in the front on the left-hand side. The kids pretty much already have the back full.” She tells me, and really it’s okay. I kinda like the front anyway. I make my way to a seat that looks vacant and sit down. Kids start piling in about five minutes later. And walking to their seats, there’s a tiny little girl that comes and seats down behind me. She introduces herself as Shaylee Apple. “Hello Shaylee Apple I’m Billie Green.” I tell her and hold my hand out to shake hers. I turn back around in my seat about the same time as a tall guy that has dirty blonde hair cut into spikes all over, ash gray eyes, so gray I can see the color all the way in my seat. He’s wearing a tight fitted gray shirt, and blue jeans. He has a very handsome face, but then he looks at me and instantly I see hatred in his eyes. What the heck, he doesn’t even know me. .