Dark Humor Hypothetical Questions Novels & Stories

“Actually, I was wondering, ‘What kind of an asshole kills 15 people?’ But then I remembered we’re talking about YOU.” “Keep making your jokes while you can, Mr. Carlson. It will be much harder when you don’t have a tongue.” Epicurus picks up the jumper cables connected to the car battery and sparks them against each other. “I thought we would start with something that won’t cut, or burn, or leave any SERIOUS damage. What do you think?” I force myself to turn away from the screen. “Okay,” I say nervously to Dominique. “Time to go.”

I questioned. I know it is stupid. Because what he does is neither of my business nor I care about it. But I am in a desperate need tk divert my mind from the hot words still ringing in my head and a dark gaze burning holes behind my back. He slurped his drink and sat it down on the table before he questioned back, "What do you think?" I moved my eyes pretending to think when I commented, sarcastically, "Maybe a fighter? Criminal one, of course." As the answer left mt lips I brought the drink to lips.

I managed to sputter, glancing up at him as he continued to soothingly rub my back. "It's just a precaution, doll," he explained, his touch oddly calming even though his words were anything but. "How about we just start killing everyone who could statistically pose a threat? As a precaution, of course," I sarcastically retorted, raising an eyebrow at him. "Now that's getting a bit ridiculous. Can you imagine how crowded my schedule would be with disposing of all those bodies?" he laughed, the humor in his eyes contrasting with the absurdity of the conversation. I stared at him, momentarily horrified, before bursting into laughter at the sheer absurdity of our conversation. Only with Axel cou

“Ok, so then what is your biggest turn-on? Non-sexually, of course.” “Of course,” Carter says, warmth in his tone. “I would say, a sense of humor. I like someone that can make me laugh. Which you do.” “Ok.” I do a little happy wiggle on my bed. “Last question: What is something about you that you’ve never told anyone?” “Oh, and I’m supposed to tell you?” Carter says, disbelievingly. “Of course. That’s the game,” I say, smugly. “Doesn’t have to be anything huge. Just something that you haven’t told anyone before.”

"Ahh! About the helicopter thing!" His eyes, which were looking at me, shook a little. "Were you serious about that?" "W-What?" "That you'll fetch me with a helicopter?" "..." "I know it's a joke. But if it came from you, I think it'll be possible." "..." "Don't you ever think of doing that in the future. Because I swear, I will kill you." "Lmao," holding his stomach, Dwight laughed so hard that it sounds so fake. "Hey! I'm a bit crazy but not to the extent that I'll use a helicopter just to fetch my sister. What are you? A princess?"

“Hahaha…” Instead of answering, he laughed. God, how can someone laugh and still look that handsome? Get a grip, Sierra. This is not the time to be mesmerized! “If I’m not human, then what do you think I am?” he asked, clearly toying with me, and I hated guessing games. “A vampire or a zombie, maybe,” I replied casually, shrugging. “Oh, or a werewolf. A shape-shifter, perhaps?” He only laughed harder at my answer. What a weirdo. Instead of responding, he just kept laughing.

She had an amused smile plastered on her face, like she was joking about adding too much sugar in my coffee. It took me a moment to recover before I finally replied, "Of course not. I don't even like bars. I was starting to get really scared if I had a doppelganger whom you might have seen instead." Why the fuck did I say that?? Now this weirdo would think I found her very expensive and not so funny prank, amusing. Melanie clapped her hands once, "See?! I think we both have the sense of humor. Oh my goodness, you Moonlight Pack folks are too serious to take a joke. " She commented and started to chuckle.

He questioned. “You’re a genius Billion so figure it out.” Jesse put two plus two together and got four as his answer but the proposition sounded so ridiculous in his head that he burst out laughing. He laughed so hard that tears streamed down his cheeks. “What’s funny?”. She inquired. “You.” He guffawed. “God that felt good.” He threw his head back with a sigh, chuckled then looked back at Helena who was scowling at him. “How am I funny? I just offered you your job back and you think that’s funny?”.

‘What? The Electrobug Dark Races was stunned. Despite cracking their heads thinking about it, they would not believe that Lucas would say such a thing. ‘If you don’t hand it over, the Electrobug Dark Races shall be eliminated?’ ‘Besides, he is even saying so in such a carefree manner?’ “Hahaha!!!” The head of the Electrobug Dark Races looked up and burst into laughter as if they had never heard of such a hilarious joke. “Hey human, don’t you think your jokes are funny?” the head of the Electrobug Dark Races was looking at Lucas and said.

"I'm not sure. I had a moment of clarity. Sometimes that's all it takes. You look at your life and see the crossroads. You put one foot in front of the other until you're walking in a new direction and the other road grows smaller and smaller behind you. It's shaky at first, but then...you're running. I think that's why I worked hard. Hard as I could. Because I saw what it could be like if I kept going the other direction." He's silent for long moments, studying me. "That's admirable, Harriet. I'm happy for you." Guilt screams through my center. You don't deserve his pride or his congratulations. I swallow hard. "Let's talk weird ideas," I say haltingly, shuffling papers on my desk even thou