Dirty Tagalog Jokes

I belonged to the Devil, only it wasn't emblazoned on my forehead. ***Desperate times calls for desperate measures as they always say. When 10-year-old Ruby Davies accidentally kills her mom in a freak accident, she's totally terrified and torn.What was a ten year old to do in such a situation?That was exactly what the Devil banked upon when he swooped in as the hero, the savior, ready to bring back her mother only for a seemingly small price which little Ruby eagerly pays. Giving up her soul seemed like a wise decision at the time.Eight long years later, with a condemned life banned from all holy contacts and soul forever destined to perish in eternal fire and torment, Ruby wants absolutely nothing to do the lying soul thief.Until he comes once again with an irresistible offer only the biggest of fools would refuse...

A send-off party for the acting CEO of Blackwell enterprise, resulted in a one-night between Sienna Dowling, and a strange man, who she later found out was her new boss, and unknown to her, a vampire royalty. Kenzo Elias Blackwell, the vampire prince, concluded that a one-night stand with her wasn't enough, even if it meant going against the one rule they must never break. Getting involved with a human. He wanted her at all costs, consequences are damned. A forbidden affair, centuries-old beef, a ruthless fiancée, and rules that have been in existence for thousands of years became the stumbling block between Kenzo and Dakota's love story.

The zombies.... Are coming! Sa gitna ng epidemyang kumakalat at pinoproblema ng mundo, Ang mga zombies. Sa gitna ng Apocalypse ay ang dalawang pusoay patuloy pa ring mag-iibigan. Pag-iibigang handang isakripsisyo ang sarili para lamang mailigtas ang taong minamahal.

My name is Hillary Clarke. I’m twenty-four years old, newly engaged to my Prince Charming, Jake Brown and I just landed a new job. Jake and I have been together for four years, ever since college, and nothing makes me happier than the fact that he proposed to me a month ago. I wear his ring with pride because I’m obsessed with him, and all I want is to build a family with Jake. We want to move quickly—get married, buy a house, and settle down in Boston within eight months, even though we’re still young. We’ve been working hard and tirelessly to make this happen but dreams don’t come cheap. Jake has a good job, but me? Not so much. Thanks to Jake, I just got a new job… working for his older brother, Bentley Brown. Bentley’s reputation precedes him. He’s arrogant, rude, and full of pride—all because of his devastatingly good looks and the company he started at twelve that made him a billionaire by twenty-seven. But he is also hot, charming, intoxicating and he has this dangerous pull that can drag you straight to your ruin. They call it the Bentley Effect. Would it work on me? I hate my new boss. He gets under my skin… and under my dress too.

Four dead students, one dead politician, one dead secret agent. What do they have in common?—Four punctured wounds in the neck and a strange burnt mark in each dead missing body. With a trusted team member missing, a partner who nearly died because of a trap, a stressed team leader, and a traitor in the team, how will Agent Night be able to solve a crime with an unidentified suspect? Will this case be the light to her dark past? In this line of work, there is only one end. You either live or die.

Markisha Ivy Barcelon a simple and smart girl. Marami ang humahanga sa dalaga dahil sa angkin nitong kagandahan at kabaitan. She have a boyfriend, His name is Mikael. They Love each other very much, the relationship they have is so happy and perfect. But.. She thought their relationship was perfect. She thought they would be happy. She thought there would be no problems. But she was wrong. Because everything that mikael showed to her was a lie. Dahil ang totoo Niloko,ginamit at pinag-pustahan siya ng lalaking minahal niya. She was hurt. Durog na durog ang puso niya dahil sa nalaman, Lalo na't lumipas ang linggo, nabalitaan niyang may bago na itong girlfriend. At habang siya nasasaktan pa rin. In an unexpected Day, their paths met. she saw his Ex boyfriend with his new girlfriend. She could not bear to see them. She left, she did not want to see the man because she felt pain and anger. And on the same day, she received a text from a stranger. The person who was texting her was very creepy. he knew everything she was doing, and then she found out that she had a Stalker for a long time. Someone has been following and watching over her for a long time. Naiinis siya dito dahil napakakulit at pakealamero nito. pero habang dumadaan ang araw nasasanay na siya na kausap ito. Gusto niya na makilala ito kaso ayaw ng stalker niya. Pero mapaglaro ang tadhana. Kisha did not expect to meet her stalker in an unexpected incedent. sobrang gulat na gulat siya ng makilala niya ito. Dahil ang stalker niya ay kilalang kilala niya. Ano ang gagawin niya ngayon na nakita na niya ang taong gusto niya makilala? Lalayuan ba niya ito o hahayaan na lang na pumasok sa buhay niya?

Dahil sa iskandalong nangyari sa unibersidad na pinasukan ni Aria Calvari, ipinadala siya ng kanyang madrasta sa probinsya. Ayaw ng kanyang madrasta na ang pamilyang Calvari ay malagay sa alanganin. Ngunit akala niya’y tahimik ang buhay na naghihintay sa kanya roon. Sa halip ay napunta siya sa bubong ng kanyang Uncle Lucio. Si Uncle Lucio Navarro ay isang misteryosong lalaki. Hindi ito tunay na tiyuhin ni Aria dahil orphan si Uncle Lucio na itinuturing na kapatid ng yumaong ama ni Aria. Gayunman, maraming naririnig na tsismis si Aria. Si Uncle Lucio ay isa rawng babaero, kriminal, dating sundalo at posibleng isang mamamatay-tao. Noong una, puros kaba ang nasa katawan ni Aria dahil sa malamig na tingin at mapang-akit na katahimikan ni Uncle Lucio. Habang lumalalim ang kanilang pagkakaibigan ay mas lumalalim din ang pagnanasa nila sa isa’t isa. Pinipigilan lamang ni Uncle Lucio ang kanyang sarili dahil alam niyang bawal ang kanyang iniisip na nagkagusto kay Aria. Ngunit ang ginawa ni Aria, inakit siya nito. Makasalanan ang dalaga. Masiyado itong dalaga dahil malaki ang agwat ng kanilang edad. Masyadong delikado at higit sa lahat ay ang masyadong malapit sa kanyang nakaraan. Sa gitna ng lahat, kahit anong layo niya kay Aria, siya namang patuloy na paglapit nito. Hanggang sa hindi na niya na pigilan ang kanyang sarili. Ang makasalanang gabi nilang dalawa ni Aria ay nasundan pa ng maraming beses. At kung kailan nagkaroon na sila ng magandang ugnayan, siya namang pag gitna ng mga tsismis. Muling nabuhay ang akusasyon laban kay Uncle Lucio. Maraming nagsasabi na isa raw siyang salot na sumisira sa buhay ng babae? Ngunit para kay Aria, handa ba siyang tumakbo palayo, o panindigan niya ang lalaking unang nagturo sa kanyang umibig ng totoo, kahit sa madilim na oras? Ano ang pipiliin ni Aria?

Hanggang saan ka magsisikap na maabot ang iyong layunin? Nagawa mo bang ipagkanulo ang iyong mga kaibigan- kahit na hindi ka kamukha ng taong gagawa ng ganoong bagay? Gutom sa tagumpay at papuri, si Lily Jenkins ay tumanggap ng alok mula sa isang napakatagumpay na paaralan. Dahil sa kasakiman at pananabik ay nagawa niya ang mga bagay na hindi niya dapat gawin, na kung saan ang kanyang pagkakasala ay aatake sa kanya mamaya. Papayagan ba niya ang isang punong guro na ayusin ang kanyang kapalaran? O subukang umasa sa kanyang mga kaibigan kahit na hindi sila masyadong mapagkakatiwalaan? Alamin sa SCHOLAR, isang memoir kung paano makukuha ng paaralang ito ang kanilang mga estudyante sa kanilang mga marahas na bersyon. Batay sa totoong buhay na mga sitwasyong pang-akademiko, dadalhin ka ng maikling novella na ito sa isang kapanapanabik na paglalakbay nang walang mga bobong karakter, ngunit may mga taong mapaglihim na maaaring maging ang pangunahing tauhan, o maging ang may-akda mismo. Is she really a psychopath?

Siyam na estudyante ang naimbitahan sa Mansiyon ng sikat na Artist na su Gregorio Santillan. Ngunit ang hindi alam ng mga estudyante, may nagbabadyang panganib na naghihintay sa kanila. At ano ang ibig ipahiwatig ng mga panaginip ni Alyssa? Ito ba ay isang babala o sadyang panaginip lamang? Paano pa maililigtas ni Alyssa ang walong estudyante sa sumpa ng painting na kanilang nilalagdaan, kung maging siya ay bilanggo na rin ng Larawan?

Shen, a daughter of a vampire hunter, strong and independent. She used to live an isolated life to hide from their enemies, the vampires. But during her birthday, an unexpected event happened in her life. They were attacked by their enemies, she died and resurrected as a mate of a vampire prince. How can she survive her life as his mate when she discovers that her father murdered her mate's mother? How long she will endure the pain of being his unwanted mate? *** Language: Tagalog-English Genre: Vampire-Fantasy-Romance Mature| Not suitable for young audiences.