Dirty Tagalog Jokes

Everyone wants to be me. Who wouldn't? I've got the looks, sexy body, money and Andrew Maru Ottave, my husband. Pero kung malalaman lang siguro nila kung sino at ano talaga ang nangyayari sa buhay ko, hindi ko alam kung gugustuhin pa nilang maging ako. Simula pagkabata ay alam ko na ang aking magiging kapalaran. Wala akong karapatan na mamili kung sino ang gusto kong makasama habambuhay. Dahil sa huli ang mga magulang ko pa rin ang magdedesisyon kung sino ang aking mapapangasawa. It's not a new thing with the elite. My parents are also a product of an arranged marriage. They marry for business and had a child for business. And just like my mom, I will also be a Business Wife.

Zyle Castillo was raised to become a gentleman. He used to work as a courier of a post office when his path crossed to the thin, clumsy yet gorgeous woman named Arila Collins. Their interests will brought them together until the small spark ignite into a sweet, fiery fire. But the summer was soon to end and there are things that hadn't been discussed yet. They need to do things fast, before it's too late. Before all they can do is to regret and ask what ifs. Or maybe it's just another summer love.

Since the moment Capt. Lazaro laid eyes on Dr. Carly, he has been telling himself that she will be his. He wasted no time in courting the doctor, and they were married soon after. Nothing can compare to his feelings for Dr. Carly. However, tragedy struck when the plane he was on exploded, leaving his beloved alone. Unbeknownst to everyone, an organization wishes to silence Capt. Lazaro and will go to any length, including burying him in the pit, to do so. But, as even Dr. Carly is unaware, Capt. Lazaro is alive and well. He will emerge from the pit to reveal the organization's secret and save his beloved.

Para takasan ang obsess na ex-boyfriend sa Manila, napilitan si Erika na mamundok at bumalik sa probinsya. Pero ang wild at partygoer na heredera maikakasal naman sa nerd at boring pero may 6 pack abs na binata! Magawa kayang i-tame ng binata ang wild na dalaga? O Magawang wild ng dalaga ang isang nerd na binata?

Leonora Bardwell’s life is turned upside down completely when her husband, Evan Montague, betrays her and steals all her fortune, leaving her with nothing but their son behind. Years later, Leonora manages to locate him, but he is now a powerful man with another identity and is engaged to another woman, the daughter of a powerful werewolf moghul, Phillippa Montgomery. Leonora infiltrates every aspect of his life to make him pay for what he did to her, however, Evan is still the same man who won her heart all those years ago. Will she lose herself while seeking revenge? Will she overestimate her abilities to objectively ruin his life? Or will she succeed and bring down the man who caused her so much harm?

Buong akala ni Hope Vasquez ay siya na ang pinakamasuwerteng babae sa buong mundo nang pakasalan siya ni Dr. Isaac Monteverdi, ang lalaking pinapangarap niya simula pa noong bata pa lamang siya. Hindi lingid sa kaniyang kaalaman na ang dahilan lamang ng pagpapakasal ng lalaki sa kaniya ay para sundin nito ang kagustuhan ng kanilang mga magulang at para na rin takasan nito ang masakit na alaala sa dating kasintahan. Hope gave her all for Isaac para matutunan din siya nitong mahalin. She even gave up her glamorous career in show business and became the kind of wife every man dreams of. Subalit gumuho ang kaniyang pangarap na mamahalin din siya ng asawa nang biglang bumalik sa buhay nito si Angenette, his first love. Kung kailan nagsisimula niya nang makuha ang loob ni Isaac ay saka naman ito bumalik para bawiin ito sa kaniya. Despite of everything Isaac did that could ruin their marriage, Hope remained loyal to him. Handa siyang magpakatanga at tanggapin ang pagtataksil nito as long as na hindi siya iiwanan nito. Subalit isang trahedya ang nagpabago sa kaniyang pananaw at sa pag-ibig niya para rito na buong akala niya ay walang katapusan. She wanted revenge. Gagawin niya ang lahat para iparamdam dito ang sakit na pinaramdam nito sa kaniya. She's willing to risk everything para maisagawa ang paghihiganti niya kahit pa ibig sabihin n'on ay kailangan niyang gamitin si Zeke, ang best friend niya na totoong nagmamahal sa kaniya. Saan kaya hahantong ang paghihiganti niya?

Aksidente at hindi inaasahan na mangyayari ni Kristina na basta-basta niya lamang maibigay ang kaniyang iniingat-ingatang Dignidad at Kalinisan bilang isang babae sa binatang nakilala niya lamang ng isang gabe. In short Kristina got a One Night Stand to the man she just meet. Dahil sa kalasingan ng dalawa at pagkawala nito sa kani-kanilang matinong kalagayan at kaisipan ay nagawa nila ang isang bagay na kailanman ay hindi nila akalain na magaganap. Ngunit sa kabila ng askidendting kaganapan sa kanilang dalawa ay magiging kabuluhan pala ito kay Kristina, kahit pa minsan na siyang nagsisisi sa kaniyang nagawang pagkakamali kung bakit niya naibigay ang kaniyang sarili sa binatang hindi niya lubos na kilala. Tila basta na lamang siya nagkaroon ng kagustuhan at interest sa binata matapos ang mainit na kaganapan sa kanila nang gabing iyon. Na tila humantong pa na may namumuong pagmamahal sa kaniyang puso para sa binata sa isang iglap lamang. Ngunit magagawa ba ni Kristina na ipagpatuloy ang kaniyang pagkagusto sa binata kahit na iniwan lamang siya nito na parang isang bayarang babae, na matapos pakinabangan ay iwan at pababayaan na lang? Magagawa ba niyang mahalin ang binata kapag sila'y magkikitang muli matapos nawala na parang bula? This story contains mature content! So, please! Read at your own RISK!!!!

Nagising si Dana Montecarlo matapos ang limang taon na pagkakaratay sa ospital. She was under comatose, matapos niyang makaligtas mula sa isang malalang car accident. Sa kanyang paggising ay agad niyang nakita ng asawang si Garrett. Masaya si Dana na malaman na nakaligtas ang kanyang asawa mula sa aksidente, and he looks alive and well... Pero sa paglipas ng mga araw, napapansin niya ang malaking pagbabago sa kanyang asawa. Ang mga halik nito ay hindi na katulad ng dati, and he is acting aloof and distant towards her, as if she is a total stranger. Ano kaya ang nangyari sa kanyang asawa pagkatapos ng aksidente na kinasangkutan nila?

What happens when a dying nerdy girl becomes the obsession of a cursed vampire? Ivy Smith has always been the quiet girl with oversized glasses, baggy sweaters, and a stack of books in her arms. But behind the laughter and sarcasm, she’s dying. Nineteen years old, running out of time, and still a virgin. All she wants is one taste of love before death takes her away. Her plan was simple—lose her virginity to Jaxon, the hottest guy in school. But then she saw him. Dante Gomez. Her best friend’s father. Her professor. The man who should have been completely off-limits. The man who kissed her once and ruined everything. Because Dante isn’t just any man. He’s a vampire, cursed with immortality and desperate to be human again. One reckless kiss transfers his Crimson Stone into Ivy’s body—he can only take it back if she dies. Now, they’re bound together by hunger, secrets, and a dangerous desire that could destroy them both. He wants his stone. She wants his touch. Will Ivy give her heart to the boy she always dreamed of… or surrender her soul to the forbidden man who craves her?

Growing up, Cindy Anne Lopez had it all. Ang kayamanan, prestihiyosong paaralan, mapagmahal at proteksyon ng mga magulang. Ngunit nagbago ang lahat nang umibig siya. Sa edad na 16, nakilala niya si Leo Montes. Ang anak ng karibal ng kanyang tatay sa negosyo.She loved him. She was crazy in love.Find out how she will get behind that mask...