Dumb Jokes That Are Funny

At nine months pregnant, I was in the final stretch of my term, and my body heavy with a baby due any day. But my husband, Vito Falcone, underboss of the family, had locked me away. He held me in a sterile underground medical room and injected me with a labor suppressant. As I screamed in agony, he coldly told me to endure it. Because his brother's widow, Scarlett, was expected to go into labor at the exact same time. A blood oath he'd made with his late brother declared that the firstborn son would inherit the family's lucrative West Coast territory. "That inheritance belongs to Scarlett's child," he said. "With Daemon gone, she is utterly alone and destitute. You have my love, Alessia. All of it. I just need her to deliver safely. Then it's your turn." The drug was a constant, agonizing torment. I begged him to take me to a hospital. He grabbed me by the throat, forcing me to meet his icy gaze. "Stop the act! I know you're fine. You’re just trying to steal the inheritance." "To get ahead of Scarlett, you'll stop at nothing." My face was ashen. My body convulsed as I managed a desperate whisper. "The baby's coming. I don't care about the inheritance. I just love you, and I want our child to be born safely!" He sneered. "If you were really that innocent, if you had an ounce of love for me, you wouldn't have forced Scarlett to sign that prenup, waiving her child's inheritance rights." "Don't worry, I'll be back for you after she's given birth. you're carrying my own flesh and blood, after all." He kept a vigil outside Scarlett's delivery room all night. It was only after seeing the newborn in her arms that he remembered me. He finally sent his second in command, Marco, to release me. But when Marco finally called, his voice was shaking. "Boss... the missus and the baby... they're gone." In that moment, Vito Falcone shattered.

After taking a shower, I stepped barefoot onto the smart scale at home. A cheerful chime rang out. "Congratulations, Mia, you're in your second trimester. The baby weighs three pounds already!" I froze. I was pregnant? How did I not know? Heart pounding, I snatched up my phone and immediately called my husband. "What's going on with the scale at home? I'm pregnant?!" There was a moment of silence on the other end before his familiar, gentle chuckle came through. "Mila, it's just a scale. The data must be wrong. Maybe you're just too sensitive since you haven't been able to get pregnant." I hung up and connected the scale to Bluetooth. In the data log, I saw three months' worth of steadily increasing numbers. Grabbing my car keys, I headed straight for Mia Lane's university.

He pushed me roughly, grabbing my legs and humping his hard d**k on my p*ssy gate. "Fuck! we shouldn't be doing this." he hissed under his breath. "Shhh." I whispered to his ears. "You opened my legs, inserted your sausage inside my cherry...and now you are backing off? Daddy, something is considered forbidden, only when you make it so." **********(Flashbacks). “Samantha Monroe, do you take Dominic Vance to be your lawfully wedded husband?” Cierra's breath caught under the veil. The name wasn’t hers, it was her mother's. But the entire church waited. Cameras flashed. And somewhere, her mother was still trapped in a courtroom on the other side of the city, where her flight was with-held. “I… do.” The words came out barely a whisper. Dominic’s fingers brushed hers as he slid the ring on. Warm. Certain. He didn’t know the woman beside him wasn’t his bride.. only the bride's daughter. It was supposed to be a cover-up, a harmless favor to protect her mother’s reputation for a few hours. But one signature turned the lie into law, and one look from Dominic, created a huge lust in her... a temptation that made her realize there would be no easy way out. When her mother finally returned, victory in court, she found her new husband already captivated by her daughter, the girl who’d worn her veil. Now the secret binds all three of them: A daughter carrying a forbidden truth, A mother desperate to reclaim the man meant for her, and A husband torn between the woman he promised and the one he can’t forget. In a world where every vow hides a sin, Cierra must learn that not all that glitters is gold… sometimes, it’s her stepdad.

At my wedding, my bridesmaid shamelessly flaunted my wedding ring. Then she had the audacity to put on a pitiful act right in front of me. My husband dismissed it as a trivial matter and scolded me for overreacting. Without hesitation, I left him and filed for divorce. If these two shameless people were so fond of each other, they could have each other.

"Why pretend you don't want us when your nipples are hard?" Oliver's hands slid slowly under my skirt. I swallowed hard, feeling a lump in my throat. I grasped his hands, but his brother Owen yanked them away. "Because I hate you all! I can't help but wonder why moon goddess made you guys my mates." Their laughter filled the room as if a hilarious joke had just been told. Gradually, his fingers made their way to my pussy skin, then I caught a glimpse of the three brothers whose gaze was fixed on my exposed body. "You must keep this between us because this bond is forbidden. We will fuck you whenever we want because you belong to us" Owen declares as I looked away from them, but Orion gently turned my face towards them, their eyes filled with lusts. There are many secrets we keep for future sake, but what if there are more darker ones to discover? ---------- Miranda's life took an unexpected turn when she was betrayed and rejected by her high school boyfriend because she was a weak omega. Devastated, She also finds out her mum was getting married to a billionaire Lycan King. Accepting a new father was difficult, but that was only the beginning of her challenges. When she met the Lycan King's sons, she discovered they were her former bullies 'The Lycan Triplets' from high school, and to make matters worse, she was fated to be their mate. How will she cope with this situation? What will happen when their parents finds out that they are mates which is forbidden? Of course it has to be kept hidden but for how long? Also will the Triplets continue to bully her, or seek her forgiveness?

กองทัพ กันต์กวี / Kai Mckinson ศัลยแพทย์มือหนึ่งของโรงพยาบาลชื่อดัง หน้าตาดีราวกับลูกรักของพระเจ้า นิสัยน่ารัก อบอุ่น อ่อนโยน แต่กลับร้อนแรงดั่งไฟแผดเผายามโลดแล่นอยู่บนเตียง ภายนอกหน้าตาดูใสซื่อแต่ใครเลยจะรู้ว่าข้างในร้ายกาจดั่งเสือที่พร้อมจะขย้ำเหยื่อให้แหลกคามือ ❤️❤️❤️ แรกพบเพียงสบตาก่อเกิดความรู้สึกตกหลุมรัก กลับมาพบกันอีกคราดั่งพรหมลิขิตที่ขีดเขียนทำให้เส้นทางของเรามาบรรจบ และจบลงด้วยคำว่ารัก เจ้าขา จันทร์กระจ่าง ดาราสาวชื่อดังเบอร์หนึ่งของวงการ เธอสวยและเย่อหยิ่งราวกับราชินี ภายนอกดูแรงๆแต่ข้างในกลับอ่อนโยนและอ่อนไหวราวกับสนต้องลม โดยเฉพาะลมรักที่พัดพาหัวใจของเธอให้ตกไปเป็นของเขาอย่างง่ายดาย ❤️❤️❤️ สัมผัสเดียวในวันวานดั่งสายใยที่ผูกเราเอาไว้ เมื่อพานพบกันอีกคราหัวใจก็ถูกผูกติดไว้กับเธอตลอดกาล

Eveyln White was used to living a double life - college student by day at the top of her class, mousy and introverted, and a bombshell stripper by night only known as Eve. Things all come to a head when her bouncer boyfriend, Charlie, angers a patron of the club, who turns out to be one of the most dangerous men in the world, Mafia Boss Antonio Bernoti.

"You mean nothing to me anymore." “And this pack,” he continued, my heartbeat accelerating. “is no longer a place for you, not with what you have done; so from this moment onward…” He paused, his eyes holding mine for a second. "You are banished, effective immediately.” The words slammed into me so hard, a loud bang went off in my head... This can't be happening. “No… Malik, please.” His eyes didn’t soften. If anything, they grew colder. "Goodbye forever, Selina." He spat, casting me one last glance, and I realized it was a look of finality, without another word, he turned and walked away. *** A week ago, Alpha Malik had discovered that I was his mate after years of fruitless search, nothing had ever felt so right in my life. But then, doom came knocking on my door the moment things started heading towards an interesting direction. A dreadful crime was executed with my name pinned on it.

"Cara Mia, fighting this won’t help. You were made for us..." Kai’s fingers cupped her cheek, one hand sliding up her thigh as he stepped closer. His fingers trailed down her arm, leaving goosebumps on her skin. She gasped softly, but before she could answer, Fynn’s strong hands snaked around her waist, pulling her back into his hard chest. His lips were hot against her neck, making her weak in the knees. “You feel it too, don’t you?” Vienna’s heart pounded as the bond snapped into place- once, then twice. Its force was undeniable, overwhelming– pulling her in two different directions. “Two mates? That’s impossible!” “How can she survive loving them both?” “She’ll be torn apart, no werewolf can survive this!” She stood between the twin Alphas, unsure of what to do next. What kind of existence was she cursed to? “You belong to us, Vienna! And we won’t let you go.” **** Vienna’s world was already shattered when she caught her boyfriend, Asher, with her stepsister on her 21st birthday—the day she hoped the Moon Goddess would reveal Asher as her true mate! Desperate to reclaim control, she kisses a stranger in a reckless act of revenge. Only to find out that not only is her mysterious kisser her new professor, but he also has an identical twin! The initial betrayal and chaos pales in comparison to the storm Vienna has stepped into. Why has Vienna been fated to two men instead of one? What secrets do these twins come with? And why has she never been able to communicate with her wolf? Could the answer to everything lie in the bond between her and her two destined mates…? (All rights for the cover belong to the original creator.)

kayla finds herself in crises after discovering that her mates are her quadruplet step brothers who she detests with all her might. Being considered an abomination in the pack, she needed no one to tell her that she would be killed the moment the Alpha King learns of it. She tries to reject them, but the consequences of living without a mate weighs fully on her and she can't bring herself to do it. More chaos erupts in her life when she finds an old letter which would require her to stay at the pack for longer than she wanted... How long would she be able to hold her secret of being mated to the quadruplets? what secrets does the pack hold against her? would she forgive her step brothers for being cruel to her all their lives? What happens when she discovers a power she posseses which can wipe off her enemies...including her mates? Would she fall in love with them and save the life of one of her mates when danger erupts?