French Jokes Novels & Stories

The teacher, a vibrant woman with a sharp accent, launched into a review intended to bring me up to speed. This was Kris's cue to unleash his arsenal of whispered commentary, blending cunning French quips with cheeky English translations that tested my composure. I was unprepared for the comedic relief he was about to provide. Every new phrase our teacher introduced was an opportunity for Kris to craft a whispered sideshow just for me. "She says, 'répétez après moi,' but I reckon she'd faint if we repeated this," he whispered slyly, twisting a basic sentence into something hilariously inappropriate but technically correct in French.

, he muttered mostly to himself. "They are", the Frenchman answered laughing, "I met an American pair in Paris once on a holiday with my mother when I was twelve, I think, I didn't understand a word he said, he ate half the syllables and replaced words with English sounding words, but that made no sense in an ordinary sentence. He was asking us, well his wife more than him, for a restaurant, she kept saying things like 'You have my Tha' and 'a place for a good nosh' and then some words that I couldn't remember even if I tried", he answered almost confused despite it being a memory.

Boorish or not, she thought, he evidently has a sense of humour. He did. As food and drink relaxed all of them, Didier began to regale her with extremely funny tales about his experiences with English people. He had the gift of being amusing without being patronising, of making serious points dressed up as anecdotes. And like the others, he was adept at playing the game of pretending that this evening was nothing more than a reunion of old friends. ‘So what,’ asked Kate at one point, ‘brings you to England?’ ‘Oh,’ Didier made a dismissive gesture, ‘business, I’m afraid. Boring business.’

I still cannot comprehend how the rest of the French soldiers are able to understand his English jargon. "Nah, y'all chill." He continued in his strong french accent. "Can't you see, that this man is just a clown? He's a joke for fuck's sake! Because I just don't know how a blind werewolf, or what do you call yourself, would think he can defeat us, even when we have loads of his antidote… I mean, the sheer audacity to even come back, after fleeing like a cockroach… haha haha…" He jeered, laughing hysterically.

I quip “A little from column A, a little from column B,” she says bouncing her head from side to side causing me to chuckle. “What did Zara say that’s so funny?” He asks with a smile once the waiter leaves. “She was just testing out her French skills, which are nowhere near as impressive as yours. When did you learn to speak French?” I quiz with great interest.

Shit “Can you bring us some french fries please” - Mike says “French fries are not drinks” - Gabe says with a chuckle “Oh, fuck of” - Mike replies and then looks at the waitress - “I’m sorry sweetheart” - he says offering her his biggest Prince Charming smile “Three portions?” - she asks while she blushes and Mike nods his head - “and a coke please” - he says “Can I have a chocolate chip milkshake please?” - I say and Gabe laughs

eat? "Then, the big fish said, 'I... like... to... eat... small... fish... that... talks... slowly.' "After that, the small fish said, 'Oh, no!'" Nobody made a sound after Stella told the joke. Stella also thought that it was kind of a bad joke. So, she coughed and said, "Is it not funny?" Vermont showed his support. "No, it's hilarious." However, Keegan said sarcastically, "Do you mean ridiculous?"

It was like time had stopped upon seeing her laugh at their enthused antics. She noticed him staring at her with sympathy, and her beautiful laugh slowly died down. "What?" "I just thought how lucky your mate is to have you," he blurted. A blush appeared on her cheeks. "Well, I thought you were about to leave," she jokingly says, changing the topic. He faked hurt, holding his hands to his chest. "Well, I never knew you could speak French." "Well, you never asked," she retorted. "Touché," pointing a finger at her. "Seriously, though, when did you learn to speak French?"

“Don’t you mean fangtastic?” “I most assuredly do not.” His face was now stern. I rolled my eyes. “OK, got it. Dick jokes are OK but vampire jokes are not. Touchy much?” His mouth was drawn in a thin line “Funny jokes are acceptable. Others should be met with the derision they deserve.” There was a pregnant pause and all silly jokes and puns rushed out of my head, so I settled for rolling my eyes at him as I jumped off the bar stool instead. “Do you have anyone you need to let know you’ll be away?” he asked

“Why did you not laugh?” Fay slowly got to her feet and cast a patronizing glance at Mina. "How do you feel about that? Is your joke truly funny? Check to see who is still laughing among those in attendance. Furthermore, a joke isn't considered a joke if it doesn't make the person telling it laugh,” After pausing, she went on, "It is called having a foul mouth." Everyone's odd eyes shifted to Mina as Fay said these words. Mina’s cheeks abruptly turned scarlet, and her eyes were full of hate as she gave Fay a scathing glance.