Funny Fat Jokes

*Abandoning ship isn’t my style. It wasn’t hers either, but our circumstances ripped us apart. Now it’s not just a literal ocean standing between us. Francine Chirilova has no direction. After coming out of the closet leaves her without a family at age 18, the quick witted 25 year old has been forced to survive on her connections and kind personality. Throw in a rapidly decreasing appetite and a tendency to gravitate toward abusive women for a epic shit show. While recovering from her latest 4 year long mistake, she makes a strong, yet unlikely connection with her virtual best friend. Que in recovering alcoholic Vasilisa Krovopuskova, aged 26 from Siberia, Russia. After surviving a grueling upbringing on her own, trust is a difficult concept to grasp. Already having experienced heartbreak once before, she wasn’t looking for anything serious when Francine crash landed into her life via an online sanctuary for lesbians. With an ocean separating the two, neither Francine nor Vasilisa know which direction to swim in. Will they stay on their side of the world, or drown trying to get to the other? *Disclaimer* - Strong mature content. 18+, please Book one. To follow is book two: “Our Blank Canvas.”

Tess betrayed by her boyfriend left the city without telling a soul, with only one thing on her mind, “revenge”.

What happens when a wedding planner has to work alongside a temperamental and annoying bride's brother to plan the wedding of the year? Chaos, pure chaos. The last thing Violet needed was a man to touch her slightly not so flat stomach (or perhaps it was a little more than slightly not to flat) and press her against a wall. She wasn't a model, and she knew it. So naturally, she just sucks her stomach in. Violet prided herself on creating the best weddings society has ever seen, the last thing she needed was to go head to head with the bride's brother, when planning Melbourne's biggest wedding of the year. Alex was everything Violet could dream about, but not touch. Handsome, built straight out of a magazine with the six pack. Was his interest in Violet genuine, or just another charm for the bedrest?

Rasa hadir tanpa kata. Menciptakan asa dalam jiwa. Dan ketika cinta mulai bicara. Perubahan indah akan tercipta. Inilah yang dialami oleh William Nugraha, putra tunggal Adi Nugraha pemilik perusahaan yang berjalan di bidang properti. Siapa sangka jatuh cinta pada teman sekelasnya yang gendut namun cantik di matanya, membuat segala perilaku buruknya berubah. Menciptakan kebahagiaan bagi orang tuanya karena tak ada lagi Liam yang bandel dan sering mendapatkan surat cinta dari sekolah. Yang ada saat ini hanya Liam si bintang kelas peraih juara olimpiade matematika. Bahkan berhasil mendapatkan beasiswa kuliah di Harvard.

"กูไม่ชอบผู้หญิงผมหยิก" (หยิกหมอยอะไรนี่มันลอนมาม่าคะเสี่ย!) "แล้วกูก็ไม่ชอบผู้หญิงตัวเตี้ย" จึก!!! (โดนไป 1 ดอก ต้องการแพทย์ด่วนตรูอยากต่อความสูงตอนนี้! ) "ไม่ชอบผู้หญิงดัดฟัน" (ใครก็ได้ เอาช้อนมาแงะมันออกให้กูที!!!!) "ไม่ชอบผู้หญิงมีรอยสัก" (เห็นได้ไงฟะ!! เล็กกะจิดริดยังสาระแนตาดีอีกพ่อคุณ!! กลืนน้ำลายลงคอแทบไม่ทัน) "และอีกอย่าง... กูไม่ชอบผู้หญิงนมเล็ก!" กรี๊ดดดดดดด!!! นมเล็กแต่เซ็กส์จัดนะเว้ยไอ้เสี่ย! ฉันแทบกระอักออกมาเป็นเลือด อ้าปากค้างแบบกลางอากาศ นี้ตรูไม่ตรงสเปคมันเลยรึไงฟะ! แทบสะดุดล้ม เข่าทั้งสองแทบทรุดลงกับพื้น เจ็บจึกกับคำว่า ตรูนมเล็ก!!! "กูไปละ มีธุระต่อ" เค้าหันไปบอกเสี่ยภูแบบไม่แยแสฉันเลยสักนิด ไม่เลยสักนิด 😭 หึ! คิดว่าคนอย่างอีชาจะไม่มีอะไรดีเลยรึไง! "แต่หนูซิงนะคะ!!!"

Year Malkame returns to her hometown after ten years of exile. She came back following pieces of a puzzle she really needed to find in order to meet her Secret santa, the man or woman who had been gifting her lonely childhood Christmases with joy and music. Being sent away from her home at the age of fourteen, she had lost the trail of the person she was looking for. But now, she wants to finally find him. But in her journey, she finds her childhood best friend Justin. A misfortune leaves her under the same roof with this man. What happens when long-time friends come together after ten years? What happens when she realizes who her secret santa is? And what the hell happens when a billionaire decides he suddenly wants her to not only work for him but also be his woman?

I was dumped because of my weight. My stepmother tried to comfort me, saying, "It's okay, it's okay. A little extra weight is good." I watched as my graceful sister took my place and married my fiancé. Meanwhile, I was sent abroad to be "fattened up like a pig." I barely escaped with my life and endured unimaginable hardships. Now, those who hurt me should, at the very least, face justice for their actions.

Marina is a girl with a great passion for medicine, she has two childhood friends, Lina and Hasan. The three people's friendship relationship was very good when suddenly there was a problem. Because his friend Hasan did not reciprocate Lina's feelings, instead falling in love with Marina. After Lina learned of Hasan's feelings for Marina, their relationship changed from friend to foe. Because she was too stubborn to have Hasan's affection, Lina tried every way to cut off their feelings. By chance Lina knew the secret of fate from her previous life, she decided to cut off the relationship between Marina and Hasan from her previous life, so that in this life the two of them could not be together. Lina then secretly used her parents' invention to return to the past, but because it was a test version, the machine malfunctioned and exploded, causing Lina's parents to die, thereby increasing Lina's hatred towards Marina. up. But despite exploding, the space vortex still brought Lina's spirit to the past and entered the body in her previous life. The first thing after Lina woke up was to kill Marina in the past, but because of that, it accidentally caused Marina to also get sick. pulled back to his previous life as the ancient Canal period. From there, Marina's journey to find out why she was dragged back to this era and how to return begins. With her medical knowledge Marina quickly became famous and gained more companions. During the journey Marina also met Prince Alex who is Hasan's previous life, their relationship quickly improved but also made Lina know that Marina was still alive. Since then Marina has to face malicious plots from Lina

Alpha Mark found his fated mated at the the most inconvenient time. Random muders, pack attacks, Lunas dieing, and female pups being kidnapped. My mate sees what no one can. The twinkling in her eyes, and smirk on her face, makes her seem playful. But, playing with Stasia might get me burned. Stasia, is human, a friend to werewolves, and smells of home. I am fucked.

Ginnieva Fajardo, a 21-year-old college student had enough. Her life always kept on failing no matter what she did to keep it from happening. It got to the point where she had to work to be able to study and obtain a degree as her parents passed away before she was even thirteen years old. Due to the unfortunate events that occurred to her, she aspired to be someone who would inspire people, an educator. Ginnie then met her professor, Phillip Añonuevo. Phillip is a 27-year-old newly promoted teacher and the eldest child of Añonuevo's family. Phillip's life, in contrast to Ginnie's, resembles that of a prince. He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, but that does not make him a tyrant. Since then, Ginnie has found him enticing and a man who is entirely right for her, so she has pursued him. However, love should be felt by both sides, which didn't happen. Ginnie was rejected for her feelings on Valentine's day, making her fearful of that special event. In order to progress in life, she refrained from Phillip up until the moment they met again. She realized that she still has feelings for Phillip after all these years, but it was too late as Phillip is now preparing for a marriage. Knowing that information prompted her to entertain boys in order to forget the man who keeps breaking her heart. But what if circumstances changed miraculously, making her the soon-to-be bride of the man who had stolen her young, innocent heart? Will the romance that has failed twice become an everlasting love, or will it remain the same, putting young Ginnie's dream to die?