Funny Adult Jokes

"Why are you angry?" I asked him. "It's not like we're a couple." He stopped, and stared at me, boring my eyes with his emerald eyes. "If we are…" He paused, clenching his jaw, "then am I allowed to be angry?” I looked at him like he was insane. “Then we'll take it to that level." He continued. "I'm serious. I want you.” Leizel Snow Garcia Waterstrings is not just fierce. She's more than that. Ending up as an ice cream worker in a local ice cream shop, it was her one step of becoming a strong and independent woman. And that's when a cold-hearted stranger came in view. Eion Aurelio Hudson. Out of seven billion people in the world, the two hard-headed people crossed paths, making her "strong and independent woman" facade slowly fall apart. With all the dramas, free food, forgotten birthdays, Robot handling, idiots around, and emotional crisis, will she be able to melt his winter heart with her blazing fire or will this fire be put away instantly? ``` ``` One Blazing Head. One Winter Heart. Two Hard-headed people. A huge disaster. (Book 1 of Hearts Series but can be read as standalone)

Luka was the best Alpha the Brightwater Pack ever had. That is, until he loses his mate and everything comes crashing down. Having lost everything he loved and his one real reason for living, he attempts suicide on a human territory, when Victoria intervenes and ruin his plans. She makes it her duty to help the man that 'couldn't be saved', after he constantly refuses her help. What happens when she uncovers his secrets one by one? Will Victoria give up on him, or will she surprise them both? Who would've thought that she could save him just in the nick of time? Or does she....

Algara Dwi Renaldo, cowok berparas tampan dan menawan. Namun memilik tatapan yang tajam seperti silet. Sikap cuek dan juteknya membuat Aletta Vanesya Unila gemas. Bukan menghindarinya malah semakin lengket. Tapi Algara tidak pernah memperdulikan Aletta, sedikitpun tidak akan membalaskan cinta kepada Aletta. Algara akan tetap membenci cewek itu, karena dia lah yang membuat Algara terkekang. Tidak bisa bebas. Selalu saja Aletta menganggunya, mengusiknya. Namun, ketika Aletta pergi jauh dari Algara, membuat cowok itu merasa kesepian, ada yang aneh dalam dirinya. Seharusnya ia happy karena pengrusuh sudah lenyap dari pandangannya. Setelah mengetahui apa yang terjadi pada Aletta, Algara benar-benar menyesalinya. Bagaimana ceritanya? Ayok baca

Ketika kasih berlabuh pada orang yang salah. Memendam dan mengungkapkan akan menjadi opsi mutlak yang harus dipilih. Gadis polos yang tergila-gila akan sepak Bola. Nascherly Aurora Oshi, itulah namanya. Ia adalah gadis bar-bar yang akan bertransformasi menjadi gadis manja jika bersama Bian. Lyshi hanya gadis biasa yang diliputi keberuntungan. Beruntung karena bisa bersahabat dengan Bian Putra Mahadewa. Lelaki sedingin es dan sehangat pelukan jika bersama Lyshi. Dua insan berbeda gender yang menjalin hubungan persahabatan, istilah klisenya friendshit. Tapi, bukankan hubungan friendshit selalu berakhir sama? Mari kita lihat akhir dari hubungan Lyshi dan Bian. Akankah berakhir bahagia? Atau malah sebaliknya. "Bian! Tungguin Lyshi!" gadis itu berlari mengejar lelaki di depannya dengan napas terengah-engah. Bian berhenti, kemudian menoleh ke arah Lyshi. Melihat itu Lyshi langsung berlari dan mencengkeram seragam bagian belakang Bian. "Bian! Kamu tuh jahat banget, masa nyuekin Lyshi terus dari tadi. Dasar manusia jahat!" cerocos gadis berambut panjang itu. Tangan Bian terulur menghapus bulir keringat di dahi Lyshi. "Udah ngomelnya?" Lyshi mendengus kesal. "Belum. Lyshi nggak akan berhenti ngomel sebelum Bian nurutin permintaan Lyshi," ujarnya bergebu-gebu. "Kamu mau apa? Yakult? Novel? Baju? Bakso mercon? Kucing?" tanya Bian menyebutkan hal-hal yang disukai Lyshi. "Nggak. Lyshi nggak mau itu." Dahi Bian berkerut, "Terus maunya apa?" Lyshi menatap maniak hitam Bian dengan serius. "Lyshi cuma minta Bian selalu ada buat Lyshi. Bian nggak boleh pergi ninggalin Lyshi apapun yang terjadi," tuturnya mengangkat jari kelingking. Bian meneguk ludah kasar melihat raut keseriusan di mata Lyshi. "Siap!" timpal Bian mengangkat jari kelingkingnya, lalu menautkan dengan kelingking milik Lyshi. "Tapi aku nggak bisa janji, Ly. Aku takut kamu yang akan pergi ninggalin aku setelah kamu tau semuanya," batin Bian

Principal Rockwell isn't the only unusual thing at HG Wells Junior High school. The prankster strikes again and again and the inhabitants of the school are powerless to stop them.Till one day, they make a surprising discovery...Bullying beefs, jerky jocks and feisty kids.Hilarious pranks are made by the Prankster. Until what is thought to be a prank results into the death of a student and the incapability of the other. Hunter Zoey, Chirag and Josh do not believe these are mere coincidences.And they're all set to prove it

Jade was found in the aftermath of a rogue attack and taken in by a nearby pack as a servant. She is told that her parents were likely some of the rogues, and as such she is treated as worse than worthless her whole life. One day, she snaps and has enough of her treatment, earning herself a death sentence. When a mysterious stranger rescues her and claims to be her mate, Jade realizes that her past may not be as simple and vague as she was led to believe. Elliott is the alpha of Silver Moon, one of the most successful and wealthy packs in the country. He's tough, smart, and lethal if someone he loves is in danger. When he sees a girl in danger during a visit to River Bed pack, he steps in and saves her. When he finds out the girl is his mate, and that she is sentenced to die in a few days, he takes drastic action to get her away from her evil pack and to the safety of his lands. But when he gets his mate home, he finds that they have more history than he thought: Jade is none other than the fallen alpha of Mystic Moon's daughter. But when both Elliott and Jade have no memory of the specifics of the attack, they realize a greater plot may be at foot here, and Elliott is--for the first time in his life-- left wondering if he alone is strong enough to face it.

18+ ( Warning: Language, Violence, adult scenes etc) "I'll kill anyone who touches you, Balia." "Even yourself?" Senna's eyes narrowed. "Especially myself." - In the dark world of organized crime, loyalty is a luxury and love is a deadly game. When Balia is taken captive by ruthless mafia don Senna, their twisted relationship ignites a deadly power struggle. Will their passion be enough to overcome the secrets of their past, or will it ultimately destroy them?

Chloe's underclass mother is married to a billionaire, and she transfers to an elite school to become the first female werewolf warrior.But her origins make her a thorn in the side of the school's four ruling brothers.They have to take a little baby girl, less than a year old, to school.But the baby girl resists everyone ...... except Chloe.So Chloe, a new adult, is forced to become the baby girl's nanny and live in the bullies' dormitory?

"I'm gay." My eyes grow so big as I stop breathing, but two seconds later I'm bursting with laughter. "Okay funny," I finally tone down my laugh as I bring myself to look at him again. But he is still staring at me like he had been when he told me that joke. "Wait," uhh, "Really?" He nods, "Really." "You like... guys?" "I fuck guys." Oh wow, you really can't have it all can you. When he checks all the boxes, suddenly there's this big box he doesn't. The most important box, the top on the list. "You're gay or bi?" Because there's a big difference between those two. "I'm gay." "You never fuck a woman?" "I've never fucked a woman." "Then why the hell would you want me to be your sugar baby? To watch you fuck another man's butthole?" He smirks despite my little mockery. "Oh now it's funny?" "It is," he is still smirking, "But no. It's the opposite of what I wanna do." I bring my arms across my chest as I reply in my all-business tone, "Enlighten me." *** 22 year old Estelle is one of the best sugar babies the agency has ever had. She has the whole package, no dick ever gone soft seeing how perfect she is, both her body and personality. But can she sway Owen into the heterosexual group? After being in that homo-pool all this while?

Book 2 in the Under the Moon Series: Zach is a young adult werewolf who had lost almost his entire family when he was still a child, only he and his mother escaped the Hunters that had tracked them down and slaughtered them all. They managed to find a safe place to live with a large group of other supernatural beings but it was never the same as being part of a pack. According to his mother, somewhere out there is his destined mate and wanting to find a new pack to live with, Zach goes off in search of them. Rem is a young adult whose family's bloodline has always been Hunters. He is brash, stubborn, often gets himself into trouble and can generally rub people the wrong way with his smart- attitude. Very few people see his softer side. So what happens when your destined mate is the one meant to hunt you down and kill you? Well, Zach is about to find out! Part 2 of Under the Pale Moon but featuring different characters and can be read as a stand-alone story. Book 1: Under the Pale Moon Book 2: Under the Blue Moon Book 3: Under the Crimson Moon: A Dragon's Pride