Funny Dark Humor Jokes

"Devils don't love, baby. They ruin." He rasps beside my ear, trailing his long fingers between my bare cleavage. Something like fire flickered in his emerald green eyes but it disappeared as it came. "Luckily, we're on the same page, Volkov. I'll ruin you and vanish your empire from this universe." I challenge, tangling his fingers with mine and dropping them from the forbidden area. His cold eyes darkened but his soft pink lips twisted with a small smirk. "I would love to see you try." ❥❥❥❥ The disappearance of Lilah Daniels' brother Robert Daniels was nothing but a mystery to everyone. She was a fifteen-year-old girl when it all happened. The only thing she knew, her brother was involved in some kind of illegal business. Robert was the only person who was there for her when their addict parents used to come back home drunk and beat the shit out of her. Even they forced Robert to be involved in such kind of bad business, only for money. Lilah promised herself to find out her beloved brother as she started collecting information. It took five years for her to reach the person only who knew where her brother was. But he was no ordinary gang leader or don. He was hundreds of boss' boss, the greatest Russian mafia king Ivan Volkov, known as the devil to the underworld. Nobody has seen him except for a few mafia bosses. He was a pure evil soul with a creativity of manipulating and killing his enemies in one blink. But she didn't care. She did her best to reach the devil and finally succeeded. But what happened when two dangerous souls met? How would they avoid the dark forbidden desires ignited inside them? (THIS IS A DARK ROMANCE BOOK! )

There isn't a single ounce of fear projecting off him as he stands in front of me, his extreme level of authority practically radiating throughout the room. "If you touch her again, the next bullet I shoot will go right through your head. Comprendere?" He warns, and the threat is clear as the eyes of many people around us widen and get scared. .................................... Lula has always liked the idea of capturing memories and moments that will last forever. You can take a picture and know that it will last at least as long as the people in it, if not longer. That is, until she takes a picture of something by accident that will make her regret that one innocent click over and over.

"As what?" I asked with sarcasm evident in my voice. "As my sex slave," Matteo Russo said, and I choked. I didn't just choke but I laughed out my heart. This had to be a joke. Laura Vento never got anything from her parents, except being sold to Antony Brown to pay off a debt. Her only chance of freedom is to pay off the money. Laura has a plan, to work her ass off so she can be free. Everything was going smoothly until she met the notorious mafia leader Matteo Russo, whose reputation precedes him. Matteo is a man with no emotions but when he meets Laura- The gorgeous red headed stripper, he knew he has to have her- no matter the cost

“Why won’t you say anything?” “Because I am under an oath!” I panted heavily. “My father made me swear an oath not to reveal our tradition to anyone. If I do, he will know, and he will come for me.” “And don’t you think I will protect you, Dora?” Jasper said, holding my face in both his hands, with hurt in his eyes. “Don’t you have faith in me?” ___________________________________ Due to constant abuse from her family, Isadora Campbell lost her will to live until her mate, Jasper Reed, majestically walked in, and saved her life. All of a sudden, Dora has a second chance at life with a mate who is recognized and respected by everyone as a hero. Jasper Reed, the most powerful Alpha in the land, couldn’t be any happier to find his mate after years of searching and almost giving up. He believed he could finally live happy ever after with his mate. Just when he and Dora thought it was time for a new beginning, secrets from the past begin to haunt them. What happens when Jasper quickly finds out that there is more to Dora than meets the eye? What happens when deadly secrets threaten to tear them apart? Will Dora and Jasper fight to stay together, or will the enemy win and take everything away from them?

Azura just turned 18 and is finally going to meet her mate. All of the packs get together when an alpha’s daughter turns of age to help her find her mate before she goes into heat. Half way through the party Azura finally senses her mate in the room. When all goes quiet as the Dark Wolf enters with his family, Azura’s wolf goes nuts. She found her mate but is terrified to learn it’s to the Dark Wolf. Lyall has been gone for years, the night he comes home he finds his mate. When he entered the ballroom and his wolf goes nuts he instantly locks eyes with Azura, but all he can feel though is her fear. Will his mate’s life come to an end like his own mother? Or will Azura break the Greyback curse as the family calls it and bring light to his darkened soul?

Kendra is a party girl living her life to the fullest. When she is kidnapped by a sexy werewolf she is pulled into a DDLG relationship. Kendra tries hard to cope with her new circumstances, but the Alpha of the Blue Moon Pack has it out for her.

Amanda White, the first daughter of Baron Broke, must fulfill her destiny as the bride of the Black Prince for the sake of royal politics. Rumor had it that the Black Prince had previously killed his two wives right after their first night. Unfortunately, Amanda White had no other choice but to undergo the forced marriage. On the other hand, the Black Prince also felt burdened to marry Amanda White, because she was a distant relative of the Queen, someone he hated the most. Various conflicts also colored the marriage and the twists and turns of royal affairs. Would Amanda White be able to find happiness in the forced marriage? Did the Black Prince even know what 'love' was?

Books 1 and 2 In a world where it is almost impossible to find a fated mate and hard to reject them, Tamia finds herself in a bind when her husband suddenly finds his fated mate. From the loved and wanted wife, she faded into the shadows of his heart. The heartbreak is intense, yet she can't let go because of the ties that bind them, but she knows only true freedom can bring her peace. So when an opportunity to escape her husband's pack presents itself by virtue of sacrifice, she takes it and does not look back. Fate might have decided to rob her of her joy, her home and her happy ending, but Tamia takes destiny into her hands and decides to create her own fate with the Dark Alpha.

Luna Jackson lived a quiet, simple life until one night dragged her into a world she was never meant to enter. Now, surrounded by danger and whispers of betrayal, she finds herself standing at the edge of a darkness she doesn’t understand. Ryan Santoro was born into the mafia, but he never truly belonged. Ruthless when necessary, calculated by nature, he has spent years trying to keep his distance from the bloodshed that built his family’s empire. But when Luna stumbles into his world, she threatens to unravel everything he thought he knew about loyalty, power, and himself. Two souls from different worlds, drawn together by fate. As the shadows close in, they must decide to fight against the darkness or become part of it.

Imprisoned for years, Astrid Sterling burns for vengeance against the pack that executed her parents. But freedom comes with a cruel twist: she's fated to Kieran, the Alpha's son and her sworn enemy. Just as she grapples with his brutal claim, a second, profound mate bond pulls her to his enigmatic brother, Rhys. Forced to choose between them, Astrid's world shatters further when she unearths her true identity as a powerful hybrid, and discovers a third, forbidden mate: a Vampire Lord tied to her deepest secrets. Now, caught between duty, desire, and a thirst for truth, can she survive three fated bonds without losing herself, or unleashing a power that could destroy them all?