Funny Hernia Surgery Memes Novels & Stories

Mathematically put; 2blahdity - 6bluffity + 5whoopsie - 8oopsdaisy + Nerdiness.The Variable Life of Sam: where N(Nerdiness) is a constant.Has it crossed your mind to wonder how the first-all-Nigerian-schools excursion would be?Wonder no more as Sam takes us "out on dinner" with his "out of this world" narrative, weaving up his "breathtaking" adventures, with students from different schools. Hilarious moments, invented imaginations, teenage crush, life as a nerd, "The Battle of Wits: War Against Bullies"...Join this adventurous train on the railway of humour as Sam, the locomotive driver of the train takes us yonder.....

The new Consigliere wanted to restructure the Mafia family’s affairs by sinking her claws into me. My boyfriend, who was a Mafia Don and wildly in love with me, wanted to get revenge on her for me. He planned to raise her status to the skies and make her suffer a horrific downfall when the right time came. He kicked me out of the family and gave all my responsibilities to the new Consigliere. She received luxury cars and jewelry from him as gifts, but he told me to tolerate it as part of the plot. When my younger brother's kidneys started to fail, I begged my Don boyfriend for the surgery fees, which he agreed to give me. On the day of the surgery, I waited from daylight to daybreak for the money, but nothing came. That was when I saw an Instagram post from the new Consigliere, taunting me. "My family's Don is such a wonderful man. Someone who was kicked out of the family was brazen enough to ask him for money. What if she can't repay us? I had to stop the money transfer. I hope this woman will find a better excuse the next time she tries to scam him." The mess ended with my brother dying. My Don boyfriend called me later in an attempt to cajole me. "Don't be mad. Joey can have his surgery later. I'm just tolerating Rosetta to encourage her to become full of herself. The higher she climbs, the harder she'll fall. Don't worry! Her birthday will be in a few days. I'll humiliate her, then make her lose everything. We'll have our wedding after that. That will cheer Joey up!" However, I knew that his so-called plot was the start of him falling in love with another woman. That was when I no longer wanted him.

After the car accident, I was gravely injured. I begged my wife, Susie Rogers, to take me to the hospital. Instead, her face darkened, and she ordered someone to lock me inside a sauna heated to 180 degrees. The reason was simple: her brother-in-law, Chester Tucker, was scheduled for an appendectomy that day. To make sure I would not undergo surgery at the same time as him, she had me injected with a hundred coagulant shots. No matter how desperately I pleaded for her to save me, she remained unmoved. Ninety-nine needles pierced my body, each one intensifying the agony of my already severe injuries. The hundredth injection, she administered herself. Looking down at me in my misery, she said calmly, "Chester has had a hard enough life since losing his wife. As his sister-in-law, I'm only looking out for him. You weren't satisfied with driving him overseas; now you even staged a car accident to get surgery before him? "It seems I've spoiled you too much. That's why you dare to pull something like this. "The doctor said that with the injections and the high heat, your pain and bleeding would be controlled. Once Chester's surgery is done, you can have yours." In that moment, my heart turned to ash. When Chester's operation succeeded, Susie burst into tears of relief and even set off celebratory fireworks to mark his 'new beginning.' Later, as she watched him leave the hospital fully recovered, she finally remembered me and ordered someone to take me there. However, before they could, her assistant called. "The hospital has asked you to come and claim Mr. Lynch's…body."

After five years of marriage, the doctor told me I was pregnant. It was something I had waited for so long. Yet, along with that good news came a nightmare. My medical tests showed that I had cancer, and it had already spread. The doctor gave me less than a month to live. I froze, gripping the report so tightly my knuckles turned white. Tears streamed down my face as I thought about how my unborn child would never get to feel a mother's embrace. My grief was interrupted by the ping of an incoming text message. It was from Mom. [Since you're so selfish and refuse to donate a kidney to save Nattie's life, you should divorce Davon. Let him marry Nattie instead. At least that way, you can fulfill her dying wish.] My tears fell harder. It was not that I refused to donate a kidney to Natalie Rivera, my sister, who was in the final stages of kidney disease. In truth, I only had one kidney left. Five years ago, I had already given one to Dad. Now, with my life counting down to its final days, I decided that I would donate my remaining kidney to Natalie. I would also let my husband, Davon Parker, go with her. Before I went into surgery, my parents praised me for finally being thoughtful, saying I had finally learned to care about my sister. They said that once the surgery was over, the whole family would go on vacation together. Davon even said he was proud that I was no longer selfish and promised he would make it up to me in the future. None of them knew I did not have a future. After the surgery, what would be pushed out of the operating room would be a cold, lifeless body.

Avalin is a 22 year old who has never had sex and can not begin to know we’re to start. She has never wanted to have sex and has been content with that. Avalin works at a lingerie store and has seen the rich and famous and those scrounging for enough to buy one bra. On this particular Wednesday a women walks in with her daughter and needed two sets of lingerie. “Honey it doesn’t matter if you like the lingerie what matters is that he likes it.” The mother said. “But mom, I don’t even know Mr. Kenway.” “Shut up Eveline, you will get him to sleep with you and get pregnant. Then we can live the lives we want.” The mother said well paying the bill and turning to walk out. This was not the first time Avalin has heard of someone buying lingerie to get there daughter to try and trap Mr.Kenway. Avalin reached for the phone to call the Kenway residence. “Kenway residence.” Avalin has called multiple times to give information so that Mr.Kenway didn’t get trapped. However this was the first time she’s heard this voice. It is more gruff and sullen than the cranky man who usually answers the phone. “Eveline Perry, will try to trap Mr.Kenway on Friday. She will drug his drink at Sky Bar after his dinner meeting.” “How do you know about my dinner meeting?” Mr.Kenway said. Avalin hung up the phone as quick as possible.

After being cheated by her beloved boyfriend, Joan Green decided to revenge him. She slept with his uncle, her future uncle-in-law, Noah Hugo, the last kid in the Hugo family, almost the same age with her Ex-boyfriend Fletcher. He was a top and outstanding billionaire in the entire state, having women by his side or sleeping with them was never his desire. Work and Women, are his whole world. Joan contacted and seduced Noah via her private account but she was rejected because Noah knew who she was. 「Wanna F?」 「Pretty. But I don’t fuck my nephew’s girl.」 Joan was furious when she saw his reply, but she didn’t expect that Noah would drink with her at the same pub.She was embarrassed and wanted to escape from him. But he asked her the same question「Wanna F?」 and then... Joan slept with him all night. After she wake up, she just found out that Noah knew her full name. He even knew her cousin Karen Green. That meant Noah knew Joan’s ex-boyfriend betrayed her? Or did he also play trick on her and regard her as a joke!? Joan was in a rage and delete him directly! What if Noah was a scum like Fletcher, then he would never contact Joan again and showed everyone that Joan was a stupid woman. But why? Noah's message was lying on her list again: 「Give me one more chance.」

"You are nothing but a Sperm Donor." "But I am your Sperm Donor." After helping deliver dozens of babies into the world, midwife Anna Johnson is longing for her child. Since her luck has always proven itself unuseful in bed, she turns to sperm donation as one last futile attempt to have a child. The donor she chooses from the catalog seems to be the perfect match - cute, college-educated, creamy, topped with a pair of the most mesmerizing brown eyes she's ever seen. Little does Anna know that the man behind the file is entirely unaware of this whole ordeal, as a cause of a drunken dare. When Daniel Williams finds out about this, things are bound to go down. WATTPAD BEINGZANYAROSS

"What about her?" Andre asked."Who?" I asked he motioned to a group of women specifically the one sitting down, I couldnt really see her because of the dim lights and the group of friends she had around her."No,""Why not?" Jason asked I took another sip before saying."She is sitting with her friends,""And?" Andre asked."Her friends are drunk,""And?" Jason asked confused."She is the only one with a beer and look at how she continuously checks her phone every five second,""And?""The beer isn't strong which means she is the designated driver her friends are drunk which means she has to leave soon, and the phone just shows that she would rather be anywhere but here, like she has much more important things to do. Which let's me know she probably won't give me the time of day because I'm not the most important thing in her life right now,""She is the one, she is the one you got to date"

Amy is a twenty three year-old girl who has everything in her life planned. She is focused on her work and achieving great things in her life. When she meets Jace, a hot and funny wolf, everything in her world is turned upside down. Jace tries to avoid her but he can't seem to stay away from her. She is fated for him. She is his awakening force...

"So deal, okay?""What about?""If you kill yourself, I'll kill myself too.""Alright. But if you kill yourself, then I'll kill myself.""Okay."Audrey Simmons is suicidal.Cayden Nowell is too.But when they were about to kill themselves, they met each other on the same rooftop.And so, they made a pact. A suicide pact.This is a story about a boy and a girl who tries too hard to fit into their group of friends but constantly failed.And when they found each other, they finally find a place they can fit into.The only mistake they made was that they broke themselves trying to fix each other.