Hilarious Book Quotes Novels & Stories

"I was thinking of ways to get rid of you." "Hahaha," he laughed, sarcastically, holding me by my fingers as he twirled me around. Uncontrollable feelings surged through my body, and my fingers tingled in delight. "That was funny. Very funny. The funniest thing I've heard in a megaannum."

"It's the hormones. Not me." He smirks. "Sure. And it's just my dick that wants to be buried in your pussy. Not me." I gasp, my thighs clenching as forbidden heat pulses through me. He winces the second it leaves his mouth, then pivots fast. "Umm, right. So... what was that last book you read to Zuri?" "Uh...Quakers the Duckling Has Feelings?" What the hell does that have to do with anything? "That googly-eyed bastard looked like he's seen some shit."

“Because I want to be your friend, and I’m not taking no for an answer.” I had a feeling he wasn’t going to listen to me no matter how much I argued, and there were only 10 more minutes before my next class. “What nonsense were you talking about earlier?” I asked. He frowned. “It’s a quote from the book.” He pointed at my book. “How many times have you read this that you memorized quotes like that?” I asked in pure shock. I didn’t ever remember him reading back in high school and he still didn’t strike me as the illiterate type.

Maybe I could start over, rebuild, and find happiness again. But for now, I would take it one step at a time. As we finished our tea, the conversation shifted to lighter topics—movies, books, and Sophie’s latest escapades at work. She was a natural storyteller, weaving tales that had me laughing until my sides hurt. “I swear, Lila, my boss has this ridiculous obsession with motivational quotes. Today, he walked into the office and said, ‘Dreams don’t work unless you do.’ And I’m like, sir, can I dream of a raise while working myself to the bone?” Sophie rolled her eyes dramatically, making me giggle.

About fifteen minutes into the drive, I asked, “Why so slow?” “Oh, I’m sorry. Do you feel the need, the need for… going faster?” I laughed so loudly I almost snorted and had to put both of my hands over my nose since even a baby like me recognizes the famous movie quote he almost said. “You’re a funny guy in an unassuming way.” He turned a slight shade of pink. “Yeah, well, in our line of work you have to find some way to be a little bit of a comedian, or you’ll end up in the loony bin.”

She won’t ask me not to show up again, will she? "Sometimes tears can ease the pain in one's heart... This phrase is from "Who Killed Midnight", isn't it?" Even though she had calmed down, the redness surfaced on her face again from embarrassment. Only after hearing the young man use another phrase from that book did she remember where the first one was from. Jake wanted to slap himself. JUST QUIT MUTTERING BOOK QUOTES, YOU WEIRDO!! She will find out this way. But he couldn’t deny it. The question was more of a rhetorical one. It would be useless to deny anything.

After Jessica recovered, she smiled, "Who knew he had it in him to crack funny jokes, Mr. Hemsworth?" He arched a brow up and replied teasingly, "Who said I was joking, though?" Jessica smiled and shook her head, "Oh My, It has been a long time since I laughed that hard. Thank you for that." Mr. Hemsworth nodded in response, patting her shoulders, "We all need some good laughs even in the midst of dire situations; laughter, they say, is medicine for the soul." "You are right," Jessica responded as she glanced at her wristwatch, "now I better get going. I have a husband to take care of and a speech to prepare," she added in high spirits.

His nose flared up angrily, "What do you mean nothing? So, I listened to your lame story about a not needed redemption, coupled up with a stupid ass quote that you got from a TV series about three girls who were given a magic cookbook for nothing?" "You see, the difference between you and those little girls is that they actually think with their heads and not their anus. You're pushing 40 but you haven't learned a thing or two about life. The first thing that came to mind when I saw you on that swivel chair was an image of an imbecile. Your hands are tied even tighter than the hands of a paralyzed being. I thought by telling you that quote you may have learned something, but I was wrong. You

“What kind of garbage are you making me watch?” “Something better than the garbage you probably picked up.” “Doubtful. Jurassic Park is a classic,” he said, shocking me. He reached over and plucked my movie from my grip. “Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, now I get the hitchhiker therapy reference,” he said, not handing back the movie. “Don’t judge me, it’s funny.”

“You still remember every word?” “Who would forget a book that turned his wife hungry for 9 inches?” “Ah!” I choked on air, feeling my whole face ignite. He did not just say that. This man. This shameless, wicked man. “You better not—” “What? You still remember his 9 inches, Adele? What was his name again... Lucy?” “Luca!” I shouted before I could stop myself. “Lilly?” That did it. I dissolved into laughter and he joined me, the car filling with the kind of sound that made the world outside feel less heavy.