Holiday Humor Quotes

On Christmas Day, I put on a reindeer-themed lingerie set, ready to spend an unforgettable night with my CEO boyfriend. Noah Levine eagerly unbuttons my top, kissing my body with feverish intensity. Just then, his phone rings. He answers impatiently. "What is it?" A sweet voice comes through from the other end, speaking in Farylian. "Noah, what time are you coming tonight? I have a Christmas present for you." Hearing those words, my eyes fly wide open. That woman is my younger sister, Heidi Miller. Noah's expression turns serious, like he's handling a work call. He responds in Farylian. "What present?" The voice on the other end laughs softly. "The present is me, wrapped head to toe in red ribbon. Come over and help me unwrap it. I can't wait anymore." That night, Noah doesn't touch me. He helps me dress, kissing my cheek with reluctance. "Work call. Something urgent at the company I need to handle. We'll pick this up another time. "Remember to wear this outfit next time, though. It's very enticing." His lie sounds calm and natural. He clearly assumes I don't understand, but I know Farylian. I hear everything crystal clear. I pretend to nod calmly. After he leaves, I accept the company's overseas assignment. In three days, I'll vanish completely from his world.

Not even halfway through the Thanksgiving holidays, my boss, Bill Griffin, calls me back to work. He demands I cold-call customers for sales and promises generous overtime pay. Eager to give my son a better learning environment, I seize every chance to earn more money and agree without hesitation. But once the holiday ends, the management posts a notice. "An employee has generated an excessive phone bill working overtime during the Thanksgiving holidays and incurred company losses. Please reimburse the phone bill immediately." Bill, whom I had worked alongside since graduating from college, swiftly turns on me. "Some people in their 30s are about to be laid off. Having a job at all is a blessing, yet they don't know how to appreciate the opportunities the company gives them." Refusing to bow to the absurd demands and open threats, I hand in my resignation that very same day. A company that discards its employees the moment the job is done isn't worth a second of my time. They will learn the hard way who holds the leverage.

"I'm tired of being lonely now. I'm tired!" Andrew screamed to no one in particular. "I have money, I have houses, cars and everything a man could wish for but I want one thing now. Just one thing. A family. A family to love and that will love me back." Andrew is a man who's lost his way. He's made a bet with an old woman to find a family who loves him by Christmas or he'll lose a mysterious prize. But Andrew has no idea where to start. May June is a single mother struggling to provide for her brother and daughter. She's determined to give them a good life, but she's afraid that her ex-husband will try to take her daughter away from her. As the holiday season approackhes, both Andrew and May June must face their fears and fight for the things they love. Can they overcome their challenges and find happiness?

“Hi, Santa, can you give me what I really desire?” “And what do you desire?” “Your dick in my mouth!” Santa smirked, “I don't think that'd be enough for you. Tell me everything you want and I’ll have it fulfilled.” Her eyes shone like she had been granted life. She moved closer to the handsome Santa, fell on her knees, looked up to him with her red face, then responded; “I want you to touch me. Caress my whole being, make my sexual fantasy come true. Kiss me, tie me, spank me, tell me the flirtiest words, and fuck me through the holidays until I smell of my “Lusty Holidays”.

SLOANE HOLBROOK is a thirty-five-year-old copywriter whose only commitment is to sarcasm, but every major holiday turns her into a single, pitiful spectacle for her judgmental family. Her solution? JACKSON, a charming, commitment-phobic Australian golf coach who needs a distraction just as badly as she does. They forge the "Holidate Pact" a year-long contract to be each other’s flawless, platonic plus-ones for every major event, with one rigid rule: zero feelings. But when a New Year's Eve kiss designed for public consumption feels startlingly real, Sloane and Jackson realize surviving the holiday calendar is easy; surviving the relentless, rule-breaking, undeniable attraction might be impossible. They signed up for a cynical transaction, but what happens when their fake relationship becomes the most honest thing in their lives?

Sixteen years old spoilt brat, with weird quotes from her diary, Katherine Amelia Jones is being stripped off her position as the only child when her Dad remarries a woman with five children, who she develops this sudden hatred for. From being bullied to getting wanted and longed for, by her bully, her step brother.Things takes a sullen turn when she finally lets her guard down and gets involved in a proscriptive relationship with the eldest male of her step siblings.***A mind blowing story filled with suspense. Totally worth reading.

🔞 Three single guys. One hopeless romantic. A fake dating experiment that’s about to explode into a real heat. ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 Layla's dating life has been such a disaster. At 28, she has had 120 failed dates, been left at the altar once, and her latest guy literally escaped out a bathroom window on their first date. 😩 Desperate for a real relationship before 30, she turns to her three gorgeous neighbors—the charming ex-rugby player Zack, grumpy analyst Josh, and her gentle ex-teacher Luke—who host the hit podcast Three Single Guys. Their wild idea was to Fake date her on air to teach her flirting, kissing, sexting, and everything in between. One "lesson" per guy. Strictly practice. For the ratings. But as the fake dates turn steamy, jealousy flares, and old heartbreaks resurface... Layla realizes she's not practicing anymore. She is falling for all three men. Why choose one when you can have them all? ❤️‍🔥 Come turn the pages if you are looking for a steamy hot reverse harem story that would keep you busy this holiday season. Reverse harem romance | Friends to lovers | Fake dating | Spicy lessons | HEA guaranteed

"Say that again, Freya. I dare you to look me deep in the eye and tell me that you don't want me and wouldn't rather want me buried deep inside you tonight. Under this stormy, cold weather instead." He taunted, his gaze lingering on me like an hungry predator as he took calculated steps towards me inside my bedroom. "Come on, say it. Say you don't want my hands roaming up and down your thighs like before, Freya. Tell me you don't want to relive those memories again with me..." The closer he got, the more harder my nipples got. "Screw you, Ethan!" I sneered. "That's not the question, Freya." ~~ Freya Smith, a nineteen year old worked as a maid for the Slades— a well known business Empire in the country. One day, Ethan, the eldest son and future heir of the Slade's empire came home one holiday and their path crossed— sparking the beginning of a forbidden teenage love affair. Freya discovered she's pregnant with Ethan's child after he had left. Freya received a letter from Ethan telling her she was merely a trophy to him and one of the many girls he could have anytime he wanted and that it's better she aborted the child or have it taken care of all by herself and of which he would never be a part of. She was also tagged a destitute who could never amount to nothing in her entire existence and beyond. Now, seven years later and Freya is an independent woman, controlling several popular jewelry businesses and engaged to the country's wealthiest man's son while the Slades drown in bankruptcy. Will Freya's thirst for vengeance be quenched? or will Ethan trying to gain custody of their child now by nook and cranny be her greatest battle yet?

She is a Lady, but she spews profanities like they were made for her. She is what you would call....A F*cking Lady. ....••••••.... Zylith Sanders was a mundane teenager until one-day she was sucked into a wash basin and somehow ridiculously ended up in a feudal world without her beloved games and movies. To make matters worse, she was sold off by slave traders to the horrid Noble house of Ronales as a petty maid. But that was not the end of her worries, Dear Zylith, the feminist had a long struggle ahead of her when she meets the mighty King of this feudal kingdom and becomes his pretend consort. With a king that likes to poke deadly humor at her, and a bamby girl who wanted nothing to do with the ancients. How will the poor teenage feminist cope with only her sarcastic mouth to rely on! Just dive in and read on to find out Zylith Sander's romantic plight.

When the Wanix Enchanters and the Luan Pack ended their alliance decades ago, the Wanix took their magic and made their own kingdom. Zelda is the newly appointed Empress of Gynem who leads with ease, humor and sarcasm. Meanwhile the Luan Pack is led by the ever confident Alpha Hunter. When half his pack is slaughtered, they seek refuge in Gynem in order to restore their once powerful alliance with the Wanix. Upon meeting, Zelda and Hunter immediately get off on the wrong foot, but with the dreaded Aleni threatening to take over their land, they must work together to save everything they hold dear. Can they overcome differing opinions, poor flirting and a tempting Beta in order to save their land or are they doomed?