Online Dating Funny Quotes

I was about to confess to my online chat partner in person when a barrage of comments suddenly flashed across my mind. [Don't bother. Jedediah is avoiding her right now. He's regretting ever mixing her up with someone else.] [It's all her fault for using a profile picture so similar to Georgia's. Otherwise, Jedediah wouldn't have gotten confused.] [It's annoying to think that when Jedediah lost a game, it was the supporting role, Monica, who comforted him. All those sweet words he said were meant for the female lead, Georgia.] [Jedediah is grossed out by it, too. Georgia only added him as a friend yesterday. It's so frustrating.] [Monica is a bane!] Dazed, I ran into Jedediah Merritt, who had just finished playing basketball. He quickly averted his gaze, but I moved around him, shoving the love letter into his roommate's hands. Online chat partner? I had more than one, sending my goodnight voice messages to several people every night.

My new neighbor is a jerk. A grumpy, arrogant shithead. At first, I was dazzled by his looks; tall, broad-shouldered, hot enough to melt panties at ten feet. But the moment he opened his mouth, I knew I hated him. He’s smug, rude, and way too good at getting under my skin. I’ve never disliked a man more, especially because he's got that 'Ill ruin you' energy and my stupid body wants it. I want him gone—until he shows up out of nowhere and saves me from getting abducted. And the worst part? The photos go viral. Turns out, my hot, broody neighbor is an NHL hockey star and now the world thinks we’re dating. His PR agent wants us to run with the story. For his reputation and fans. Fake dating? With him? Great. *** Rhett Lawson isn’t just the world’s hottest hockey player. He’s a powerful Alpha hiding his real identity. His parents were murdered when he was just a boy, leaving him and his pack scarred and cursed. And the reason he’s in the human world is because the Moon whispered, “You’ll find your greatest enemy and your fated mate in the human world. She holds the key to your redemption.” His only goal is to find his enemy and the fated mate who holds the key to his redemption. Not get tangled with his annoying neighbor. THE CRESCENTMOON DUET ⁠◕ Fake Dating My Hockey Alpha The unforgettable love story of Rhett and Lucy. A tale of passion, sacrifice, and the bond that defies all odds. Book Two: Fake Bride of the Heartless Alpha Hyera’s journey, a new character whose destiny intertwines with Atlas, their son. A story of resilience, heartbreak, and the miracle of love that rewrites fate.

"Skylar, here's a hundred for the breakup. Don't crawl back." Mack flung the bill at my face like he was doing charity work. "Winona's the Frostmoon Pack's Beta's daughter. She'll save me twenty years of hustle. You? Still drowning in student loans." I eyed Winona's designer bag—logo halfway printed like it gave up mid-stitch. "You're sure this is a breakup?" "Locked in. Engagement party's tonight at Lunara Estate. You can crash if you want a pity plate. Might be your only shot inside." Door slammed. I turned to the hot wolf crouched by the ditch, mid-bite on a rabbit leg. "Hundred bucks. I'm renting you for two hours." He arched a brow, blood slick on his lips. "That's cute. But for that price? You're barely getting a paw."

My boyfriend of eight years didn’t just leave me. He left me for my sister. And then suddenly, they were getting married. I hate being seen as the weakling, the ugly one. So I did what I could. I made an offer to Liam Carter —my Highschool Bully when we met in Tuscany. The last person I ever wanted to owe anything to. We pretend to date for the summer, to make everyone believe I’ve moved on and in return I help with his PR stunt. It was supposed to be fake. No feelings. No strings. Just a deal between enemies with something to prove. But the more we pretend, the more the lines blur—and suddenly, the boy who once made my life miserable might be the only one who truly sees me. And the worst part? I think I’m starting to fall for him.

It's a blind date. Neither of them wanted to be paired. She agrees to it so she can keep her secret from her family. He agrees to it to fulfill his grandmother's dying wish. They are just pretending; a scripted act. That's what they tell themselves. But they soon begin to forget their lines in the play as love blossoms between them. Anders and Electra never thought they could love each other as much as they had hated each other.

“Go on ten dates with me. I’ll prove I’m not the man you think I am. And I’ll give you a million dollars.” Cas said, looking at me like he was making a business deal. “Is this another way to have sex with me, because it’s becoming kind of desperate. ” “One million dollars. I will draw up a contract. Sex will not be one of the requirements to get the money.” “And what do you get out of it?” I asked, wondering if this was too good to be true. “You won’t get me.” “We’ll see,” Cas replied with an arrogant smirk that I wanted to smack off his face. “Do we have a deal?" ----- The arrogant billionaire Cassius Hemming is intrigued by the single mother, Ripley. Not only does she show no interest in him, while most women throw themselves at his feet, she actually shows distaste when talking to him. Cassius has always wanted what he can't have, and as a billionaire, there isn't much he is unable to buy. He is determined to win Ripley over and then punish her for rejecting him in the first place. So Cas makes Ripley a deal she can't refuse. Go on ten dates with him, and he'll pay off all her debt. But what happens when the billionaire's plan backfires?    

Online boyfriend ko ang boss ko. Pero hindi niya alam iyon. Patuloy niyang hinihiling na makipagkita ng personal. Gee. Kung magkita kami, maaari akong maging palamuti sa pader sa sumunod na araw. Kung kaya, mabilis akong nagdesisyon na makipag break sa kanya. Nalungkot siya at ang buong kumpanya ay nagtrabaho ng overtime. Hmm, paano ko sasabihin ito? Para sa kapakanan ng mental at pisikal na kalusugan ko, siguro ang pakikipagbalikan sa kanya ay hindi ganoon kasamang ideya.

This is a story that contains the stories of six people and their lives s a family. Starting with Krissy a young doctor who works with the military and finds love on the worst of days. One by one her kids and herself grow and add to the family over a span of twenty Plus years.

“Now tell me, Cupcake… exactly how many inches of this Cock can you take?” I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think. All I could feel was the weight of his threat and the heat of his gaze. “Say it, June. Who do you belong to?” “You,” I whispered, the lie tasting like honey. “I belong to you.” One report. That’s all it took to turn Knox Ashford from a bully into a god with a grudge. One video. That’s all he needs to keep the school’s golden girl on her knees for him. June Montgomery is a quick learner. She learned how to take him, she learned how to swallow her pride. But she never learned to handle the jealousy of a man who would rather destroy her life than see her in his brother’s arms… He calls her a snitch and a slut, but at the end of the night when the doors are locked, he only calls her one thing: Mine. Enter at your own risk. 🔥 This book is packed with raw obsession and explicit scenes in nearly every chapter.If this isn’t for you, please don’t continue. Reader discretion is advised. 🚨(85% sexual content) ⚠️

Jericho just wanted an autograph from her idol, hockey star Ajax Reinhardt. There's just one problem : the fan outside the locker room stretches for miles. So, in a moment of impulsive genius, she sneaks into the player's bathroom, hoping for a quick autograph. However, Ajax finds her hiding in his bathroom, he assumes the worst. Jericho panics, trying to explain herself, but as he reaches for the door to call security, she grabs his towel in desperation. One tug was too hard, and the towel dropped right as the door swung open. The paparazzi take pictures of him naked. Now, Ajax's career is on the line, Jericho's dad wants her out of school, and her only way out to stay is to pretend she's dating Ajax himself. He's furious and she's desperate but they have to make it work. However, when their fake-dating turns a little too real, the ice begins to melt. Fast.