Pirate Jokes Novels & Stories

Lilly asked. “Knock yourself out,” I replied. “So, are we going to bother to address the elephant in the room?” Julie asked, looking over at her sisters. “Don’t you mean the wolf in the room,” I replied, trying to lighten the mood. My comment managed to make Lilly laugh out loud. “Right,” Julie replied, not sounding impressed with my joke, “So, you smell like a rogue,” Julie stated looking at me.

“They ain’t just pirates, I’m telling you. They’re all highly trained thieves … and their tricks can beat even the most skilled swordsman.” “Trained?” Tristan raised an eyebrow. “You’re implying they have someone as a master or lord or whatever.” “Aye, they have. Folks say they have Pirate Lords … and the Pirate King ruling above all.” Tristan’s hand went to check Draphiron’s core inside his pocket. If such thieves would come to attack the ship, he had to plan beforehand. But his trust in his sword skills overwhelmed his anxiety of losing the core. He probably could still fight even when he’s out of the country.

Just like the rest of his mates, average body of an alcoholic and unhealthy diet pirate, the Second Mate bravely spit out his words. It’s their inside joke. They, pirates, are usually stealing and hording women for their own lust and personal desires, and now . . . Searching for allies was never their doings. Captain Black Beard gives him the looks of great darkness and lust of spitting off his blood in his veins. “Are you ready to get your head off from your neck?” “N-No, c-captain.” Scared, trembling voice came out from his mouth while trying to straighten up his words into fix sentence. “Forgive me.”

“Hail Captain Red Beard!” The men repeatedly cheered their captain’s new name. The ship was merrymaking as a few men played musical instruments and others were dancing. Their variety of foods includes turtle eggs, vegetables, meat, bone soup, and fish. It looks fresh. The saddest part of being a pirate is not being able to keep their food fresh because it would rot in due time. I learned that most of them frequently suffered from malnutrition because they lack vitamin C. They mainly eat dried food such as sea biscuits, beans, and preserved food.