Profile Picture Funny Novels & Stories

"I'm gay." My eyes grow so big as I stop breathing, but two seconds later I'm bursting with laughter. "Okay funny," I finally tone down my laugh as I bring myself to look at him again. But he is still staring at me like he had been when he told me that joke. "Wait," uhh, "Really?" He nods, "Really." "You like... guys?" "I fuck guys." Oh wow, you really can't have it all can you. When he checks all the boxes, suddenly there's this big box he doesn't. The most important box, the top on the list. "You're gay or bi?" Because there's a big difference between those two. "I'm gay." "You never fuck a woman?" "I've never fucked a woman." "Then why the hell would you want me to be your sugar baby? To watch you fuck another man's butthole?" He smirks despite my little mockery. "Oh now it's funny?" "It is," he is still smirking, "But no. It's the opposite of what I wanna do." I bring my arms across my chest as I reply in my all-business tone, "Enlighten me." *** 22 year old Estelle is one of the best sugar babies the agency has ever had. She has the whole package, no dick ever gone soft seeing how perfect she is, both her body and personality. But can she sway Owen into the heterosexual group? After being in that homo-pool all this while?

I am a real estate agent. My mom, Irma Bond, comes to me privately and asks me to sell her apartment. She explains, "Your dad is having trouble with his business. I want to give him a little assistance." This apartment was left to her by my grandmother, Anita Crosby. It was meant to be a safe haven just for her. For my dad, she is selling her own refuge at a low price. Soon, a buyer contacts me. The woman says to me, "Hi. Could you reserve the apartment for me first? I'll have my partner give it to me as a birthday gift next week." The moment I catch a glimpse of her profile photo featuring her and her partner, I freeze. It's my dad! I nod with a smile as I reply, "Of course. I look forward to seeing him soon."

One woman and three men battle it out for their futures. The alpha takes in a woman who helped him years before, the reason? He wants her to marry one of his sons and heirs. Whoever she marries will become the next alpha. But the woman holds secrets that no one knows, and the power at her fingertips overrules the alphas and his sons. Will the alpha get what he wants? Will his sons ruin their chances with her? Or will the wolf king be her mate? Follow Khanna on this journey of self-discovery and her fight for survival and love.

The fearful time to leave the nest arrives for everyone, even more for Catherine, a recent graduate full of dreams in front of her and now receiving a job offer in a renowned law firm far from her hometown, this is the time to move on and fly high, but things are not as easy as she imagines, the obstacles seem to focus on a single person, her boss Miguel who apparently loves to be a tough guy and pick on her, is this all bitterness or is the weirdo hiding something?

Mia, an 18 year old. Living a life no one should ever have to experience. Having an abusive father and a mother who would love her father no matter how many times he abused them. How will the MMA fighter who she felt an instant connection fit into her life? Having no choice but to escape her horrible life, leaving everything and everyone she knows behind. How will Mia be able to live on her own? Will Mia be able to leave her past life behind?

Alacrimia in Layman's terms is the congenital inability to produce tears. Some places in Africa have their norms and beliefs wrapped around age-old, blind superstitions. Especially the rural communities. So when a young girl comes from the city to the village, and it is discovered, through a series of unfortunate events, that she won't cry, even when induced, things take a downward spin for her, as she finds herself from Osun State to Kogi State, and then Enugu State.

Since the day Serenity got hitched to a stranger on their blind date, she had assumed married life would be ordinary but respectful and mundane. It never crossed her mind that her new husband would be clingy like a piece of gum stuck to the bottom of a shoe. To her utmost surprise, he could make her troubles disappear whenever she was in a fix. Despite her questioning, her husband would always pass it off as luck. Until one day, she watched an interview with a local billionaire known for fussing over his wife. That was when she noticed the uncanny resemblance of the billionaire to her husband. The wife whom he was showering attention on turned out to be her!

Today happens to be Yvonne Ziegler's birthday. Yvonne is Shawn Jacobson's, my husband's, newly hired personal assistant. Shawn spares no expense in buying her a villa as a birthday present, and Yvonne haughtily takes to social media to show off on the day she moves in. "I'd like everyone to know that I'm married to a wealthy man now." Shawn comments on the post, saying, "Happy birthday, my beloved Yvonne!" In the picture, Shawn's hand rests intimately on Yvonne's slender waist, leaving no doubt about their intimate relationship. In that instant, the company's group chat erupts into a frenzy of notifications, as colleagues declare their envy of Yvonne and heap praise upon her for being young and accomplished. Oscar Jagger, my childhood friend, notices the picture and immediately tags me in the group chat. He then sends me a pointed, teasing message, saying, "Shawn's display of love is so glaring! Congrats on being cheated on, Leslie!" I manage a bitter, wry smile, taking my time to type out the response. "Do you need a villa as well, Oscar? I'm happy to give you a place—a much nicer one than Shawn's, of course."

My sister-in-law sent me a photo of her kissing my husband on the beach. Just a few minutes later, she deleted the photo and sent me a text saying, “Oops, sent to the wrong person. Lol.” I knew it was deliberate. It was never a mistake. She wanted me to see how happy my husband was with her. Clara was never my sister-in-law. Three years ago, my husband had lied about her, claiming she was his younger sister, and I believed him. But after five years of marriage, I discovered—far too late—that Clara was never his sister. She was his mistress, his childhood lover, the woman he had been sleeping with under the same roof as me while making me serve her as if she were truly my sister-in-law. And now what? He had lied again… said he was going on a business trip. Yet Clara had just sent me a picture—a cute, sickening picture—of my husband happily kissing the very woman he had once claimed was his younger sister. The photo carried a timestamp showing the exact time and location. It was real. There was no denying it. They were in Hawaii, on a beach, laughing, kissing, and having the time of their lives… while he had made me believe he was away on business. Without saying a word, I saved the picture and posted it straight to Instagram, captioning it: "Congratulations to my sister-in-law… on finally becoming the official wife.” Then I turned off my phone and went to bed. The next morning, after having breakfast with my cat, Lulu, and taking the warmest bath ever, I turned my phone back on—and froze. Over 200 missed calls were waiting for me. Notifications exploded across my phone. And it didn’t stop there—the number of unattended messages kept climbing past 250.

"I…...Supreme Alpha Sheila Mahamanga of all the supernatural world…….hereby send you Eden Rastol back painfully to the abyss…... of eternal pain….., may you never reincarnate again!" Sheila, queen of the supernatural world and the present time is….the Supreme Alpha of all werewolves in existence. She has lived for thousands of years and stopped aging at the age of twenty-eight. She's Ruthless, a female Alpha that portrays danger, evil, and most especially death. She was cursed by the moon goddess to be mateless for the rest of her life, because of her cruel nature, misuse of power, and constant death punishment. Since then her evil has tripled as she becomes unstoppable. She controls the whole pack of the werewolf, she is the Supreme Alpha, other Alpha's crawl to the bare floor at the mention of her name as no one dares utter her judgment except you are ready to die!!! Fate becomes twisted when all of a sudden on the full moon, she finds herself being mated to an Omega. She was angered, as she roars in horror, daring the moon goddess Eden Rastol was a born Omega In Harlet Moon Pack. He was twenty-five years old. He lives with his parents who cherish him so much, regardless of his weak nature, but fate has always had a blow on him. He has been rejected two times by his various mate, but his last rejection left him shattered. He was thrown out of his pack and fate being funny, he found himself in Blackheart, where the Supreme Alpha lives in. Funny enough he was unfortunately mated to Supreme Alpha Sheila for the fourth time.