Shitty Puns

Forbidden fruit. Alessandro 'Flames' Petrakis doesn't give a shit about love. Guns, violence, being a bodyguard is what he's good at. Love scarred him once, love took away the only woman he ever loved and he'd rather relive his time in the Marines than fall victim to it again. Then she shows up. Blonde hair, sapphire eyes, pretty as fuck. And the one woman he hates more than anything in his shitty world. He never claimed to be a prince, yet she becomes his princess. Violence is what drives him yet for her he would put down his Glock for an eternity just to be part of her world. She was the forbidden fruit. The woman he was supposed to stay away from. The woman who took away everything that mattered from him. Yet one fucking kiss from her and he would burn the whole world for her. Code name: Flames. Mission: Protect Mia Tonelli at all cost

“I want her. As my tribute this year” Alpha Dominik declared loudly, stunning me and the whole crowd. My life had taken a shitty turn at 18, when I had failed to transform. My father, the man who was supposed to protect and love me, had cast me away to live the miserable life of an omega. Hope came however, when the new Alpha of the clan had decided to give us omegas a second chance to rewrite our destinies by getting a second chance at getting their wolf awakening. Like I wanted, the ritual worked and my wolf was awakened. But why does my wolf start to pine for Alpha Dominik, the Devil Alpha that had everyone shaking in their fur just at the mention of his name? Even worse was his despise for me, a weak omega whom he didn’t deem fit to be his mate. Now I’m stuck in between the Alpha who wanted me and the Devil Alpha who could not accept the mate bond by the moon goddess. Would the Devil Alpha accept this mate bond by the moon goddess? Or leave me be.

I was just a normal girl, despite not being human. Growing up my life was shitty, but still I was glad to be alive despite how dead I felt inside. There wasn't a single person in the world that I could trust. Not a single person that I cared for. Until HE came. My boring life soon vanished, werewolves hunt me from all corners of the earth. Rogues,Alphas, and kings alike. I was kidnapped, despite him telling people differently. Everyone told me he was a monster, the beast that never loved, he didn't feel pain, or remorse. For a while I believed the stories and rumours, until I came to realise that the beast simply acted on the assumptions of others. They called him a beast. They treated him like an animal. So the animal he became. But I could see the pain, the agony that he feels every day of his life. Unable to see the world in colour ever again, completely blind in human form. Slowly I was falling for the Lycan, not realising that he was waiting to catch me.

Seven years ago, I turned my back on my powerless fated mate, Soren, and chose a powerful Alpha instead. Now, I’m dying alone in this shitty apartment with seven days to live. The Moon's Glow is fading inside me. Without the Final Rite, my soul will be chained to this earth, a ghost doomed to an eternity of torment. And no Alpha will perform it for me. Coughing up another mouthful of blood, I dialed the one number I swore I’d never touch again. Soren. The mate I rejected. Now, the most powerful Alpha in the North. I begged him for the Final Rite. Moments later, his engine screamed down my street. But the boy I once knew was gone. The man staring back at me now held nothing but pure, undiluted hatred in his eyes. "Well, well. Look what we have here," he sneered, his voice dripping with venom. "The fallen princess. When are you going to finally drop dead? The second your heart stops, I’m dumping your corpse in the Feral Lands for the scavengers."

“Who the hell typed this contract, Liam? I see typos.” “What typos? I wrote every damn word myself.” “Then you must’ve been typing while Evelyn was suck–” “Shut the fvck up, Olivia! Just sign it, or forget about ever seeing my babies again.” “They’re my babies too, you asshole! Would you sign if some psycho shoved this shitty contract in your face?” “Then don’t sign. Your loss. Get the fvck out of my office. Call me only after you sign, or you’ll regret it.” --- I thought giving birth would be the happiest day of my life. Instead, it became the day my whole world shattered. While I was still weak and bleeding in that hospital bed, my husband walked in… not with flowers, not with comfort, but with a hard blow to my stitches. That devil set a trap far worse than our marriage itself. And no matter how much I hated him… a part of me still burned whenever he touched me. Was this love, madness, or the devil’s contract I could never escape?

Loverina, a lonely girl trained by her poor grandmother, unexpectedly got into a shitty mess with the heir of the Oscars' family. To pay the price of her deeds, she was taken by the heir as a slave to satisfy his sexual urge. What power does a low class commoner have over such high status? *** Loverina was about to eat the food Alexis brought earlier when Jayden came out of the bathroom, naked. Seeing that, her fork dropped back in the plate and her mouth wide opened. Their eyes met and she looked away immediately as her cheeks got hot. He was just too perfect. And she wished he would come over and touch her, she was already daydreaming when his voice brought her back to reality. “Is it your first time seeing me like this?” He was in front of her with a towel in his hand, drying out his wet hair. He would have just tied the towel around his waist but instead, he came out naked with the towel on his hand. That’s hot! She swallowed hard, inwardly praying in her mind for anything. She didn’t even have a particular thing in mind. “No.” she finally mumbled.

Felicia Eviana, a girl with a sweet face and a smart mind, must experience the feeling of being put down by junior level. Only because they know she is one year older than them but still taking the same courses. “Her ID Card is old but how come she's still taking this course? It must be stupid until she repeat it.” It was a sentence she often heard and she was lazy to explain, let alone respond. Jayden Jordan, a handsome man in Felicia's class, they even joined the same thesis project team. The man who had been watching Felicia from afar. Shitty but smart man. Ansel Bastian, ex-boyfriend of Felicia who is now a laboratory assistant at the campus laboratory since graduating. For the sake of being able to continue to see his ex and hope to get back together again as before. Harumi Haida, a student with glasses and nothing special. Join the thesis project with Jayden and Felicia. The type who wants to immediately graduate and complete research ahead of her teammates. Selfish and cunning. How is the story of Felicia spending her final semester on campus after returning from leave? Was her relationship with Jayden just a partner or something more? Also, will she return to Ansel who she secretly loves?

What were the odds that I'd just fucked my boss and been too buzzed, too horny to clock it? Impossible. Catastrophic. My life was like a ticking bomb of fuckups already; this would only make it explode. "Get a grip, Shayle," I whispered, shaking my head hard. It can't be. -------------- What would you do if you found out you only had four months left to live? In the case of Shayle Vale, she was the definition of a plain Jane; quiet, overlooked, and freshly dumped by a boyfriend who called her ‘boring’. But when the doctor drops her death sentence, she decides ‘boring’ dies today. She made a list; Quit her job, Lose her virginity to her hot next-door neighbor, get a tattoo and Do what the fuck she wants. But life doesn’t play fair. Her shitty boss refused to accept her resignation, her neighbor was allegedly still a virgin, and nothing on her list was going according to plan. Now Shayle’s plain, safe little life is spiraling into messy office wars, late-night temptations, secrets she never saw coming and a toxic love triangle. Will she tick off her last wishes, or will fate throw her off the list completely and into the arms of two sinfully attractive men instead?

Sixteen years old Mercury Roderick who has been mute from childhood, can see things beyond the natural. She can perceive danger, and foresee death. But keeps this as a secret and try to do all her possible best to save whom she can, with her supernatural abilities. A twenty-one year old, college dropout with the name Aiden Wyatt, comes to live with his dad next to her house. He is depressed and stucked with borderline personality disorder. He hates everyone, mostly his dad. They wake up their neighbors with fights and quarrels every morning. But this isn't what unconsciously pulls Mercury towards Aiden. Inspite of his shitty attitude and rotten personality, there's this dark shadow she only can see, that revolves around him and makes him do terrible things to people. Something which makes him get thrown into jail one too many times. It whispers inaudible words to Mercury, and then disperse from Aiden whenever she sees it. Leaving Aiden completely calm and collected, like he isn't a troubled adult. Mercury figures she's Aiden's saving grace, and tries to stick around him. Which stirs up complications between them and their families. Worst, she finds herself falling for Aiden.

Retired Marine. Force Recon. When Callan 'Cannon' Asher retires from the Marines and joins the best security firm in Miami, the jobs seems too easy. Protecting civilians is all he knows, pulling the trigger on people who don't deserve it is all he knows. When he receives a job to protect the Mayor's daughter, all hell breaks loose because the raven haired girl isn't just a brat but unlike any woman he has ever seen before. When he sleeps with her and abandons her when she gets too clingy, he learns the hard way that love isn't like one of his covert missions in Afghan (simple and fast) but a shitty complicated game. He never wanted to settle for one woman. Yet she's the only woman in his mind. He never dreamt of having a family behind a white picket fence. Yet she gave him sons. Twins! Most of all he never expected to lust over a married woman because not only did Nicole Montenegro screw him over by hiding his sons from him but she also went ahead and got his children a man to call their dad. For him, this is by far the most deadliest mission he has ever been on. Code name: Cannon Mission: Get his woman and his sons.