Very Funny Jokes

"Submit!" He growled at her , his grip on her neck tightening but not enough to hurt her. To only have her smirk in return. "Many have tried mate" "I am not others dammit! I am your mate! Your superior!" He screams agitated , looking at her with helpless eyes.While she looks unaffected. "You can try" "But remember. You will never succeed in it." He could end her existence with just a little more pressure. Giving her a fate like others who have ever dared to defy him. Yet the fire in those brown eyes. We wanted to extinguish it. To make her beg him to continue as he denied her. To see her eyes rolling back as he entered her. He wanted her to submit to him completely . Body, soul ,mind everything. To let her be her protector,her dominant, her punisher ,her lover , her mate. Her everything. And he will lay the entire world at her feet. But little did he knew that his mate was not an ordinary Luna who submits to a man's whims and orders. She was the infamous Rebel The mysterious bringer of justice and protector of women. The very person who every male fears in the werewolf world. If only the world knew Rebel was not a man , but a women called Vera Red ....... "The day I submit to a man will the last day of my life life Mate. Vera Red was born as a Rebel, will live as a Rebel and also die as a Rebel. With or without a cause"

Trigger Warning!! This book is very dark, containing torture and abuse, read at your own risk!! "Take off your clothes Brie! You can't run from me! I'll always catch you, little mouse." His menacing voice rang out. I was already caged between him and the wall, there was nowhere left to run. He caught my wrists in a strong grip, until I cried out from the pain. "Please I'm not ready! I need some more time" I sobbed, my whole body shaking badly,I was willing to do anything to reach out to whatever little humanity he has left. His eyes were cold. Merciless. He was going to hurt me, I knew it. "But you were ready to run away with that bastard, weren't you? " The smirk on his face as he taunted me betrayed the icy rage that simmered in his eyes. "You belong to me, Brie! I'm your husband! And I won't be denied of my rights, Refuse me again, I dare you to Brie!" He hissed, his grey eyes simmering with hot fury. What happens when Gabriella Thorne gets forced into an arranged marriage with Lucian Castiel. He is Cold. Brutal. He gets anything he wants. What happens when he's determined to TAINT Gabrielle's innocence with his darkness. Is there a flicker of light at the end of the tunnel, or would she be forever tainted by his Psychotic Obsession?

*completed* Running away from her uncle, who kept her locked up in a room for almost 2 years after her parents died. He just wanted all the wealth of her parents. He tortures her to hand over the property to him. She has no choice but to run. She reached the dark forest where humans were strictly restricted to even stand near it. But entering the forest she did not know that her fate is tied with the king of the forest. Her uncle who is searching for her everywhere and the mateless alpha standing in front of her, to tear her apart. What will happen to her now??Alpha Vance" please at least be with her during her heat; she is a human Alpha, she can’t handle the heat. Usually human don’t have heat, but she is an Alpha’s mate, and an Alpha’s mate has to go through very worse heat than an omega." Astrid begged, but I didn't answer." look Vance___" I cut her off.." no, you look here Astrid. I don't fucking care if she lives or dies. I want us to be together."" How can you be this selfish?" she asked, and that made me go out of my mind." shut the fuck up, Astrid," I shouted and she flinched but didn't utter a word."She is mate or not I love you, Astrid , let her die I don't care

“I don't want to be like this anymore!”, Maria shouted hysterically. Maria, a successful businesswoman of her age, broke down in tears because of the unusual feelings she got after she achieved her dream of fame. She got everything---- money, fame, and boosting career but she can't be happy. Her love life fell when she started reaching her dreams. She left George over her career even though she got his full support. George was Maria's first love, a man of dignity, and love and respected Maria on every decision but the only problem was he was contented with his career--- a turn-off for a woman that chased dreams. Dreams without happiness were nothing but only a piece of a show-off for other people. Will Maria feel the happiness she was looking for in the dream she achieved? Or she will stay a successful but unhappy woman in life?

Sylvain Wilde had been searching for his mate from the moment he shifted. All he wanted was to find his other half and live his happily ever after. Except, he didn't realize that his mate would be of a completely different species from him and that she would be an enemy he'd be willing to give his life for! _____________________________________________ Book 5 of the Mate Series! You have to read Books 1 - 4 to understand this one! Books listed inside!

“Don't fight the emotions you feel for me, Sammie” Max said, The Alpha king said, as he caressed my cheeks as a prized possession that I was. He paid a lot for me to get me as a slave. “I am not fighting it. I am only guarding my heart” His present was becoming more addictive but I wanted more than he wanted to give me at the moment. I wanted my freedom. “I can't think of one good reason not to kiss you right now. I want you, Sammie, I want you so much I might break, my possession. You belong to me” “I belong to no one” Poor and maltreated Sammie, thought she was finally getting away from the harshness of her own family and everyone in her pack when she clocked eighteen and she was finally going to get her fated mate. But her dreams shattered as fast as they had come to her, she had been mated to Max, the scornful son of their alpha, who currently has the most gorgeous girlfriend, who didn't waste any more time rejecting and humiliating her. Her fate was sealed, she was going to be hated more, but nothing prepared her for the betrayal of her family. She was sold to the slave master. But got bought again, by Max himself. Her nemesis. And when would she be able to get her revenge on all those who treated her worse than an animal?

"You conniving bitch, I've had enough of you! Your face makes me sick! Just fricking go to hell, Lana!" The anger in his eyes, the disgust on his face... These were everything Lana was used to,. but her heart still bled at those words. 23yr old , Lana Fernandez wanted nothing more than the love of her husband but this seems like a dream that can never be accomplished. Her husband, Damien Romero only married her at the insistence of his grandmother because she saved his life but his heart will always belong to his ex-lover Rina... or so he thought. Trapped in a loveless marriage to be an afterthought, to a woman she'd never measure up to, and mistreated by both her husband and his family, Lana seeks a divorce after the loss of her baby. Determined to forget him completely, she returns to her life and suddenly, Damien sees she's not who he thinks she is. The woman who was thought to be a gold digger and a low life was actually a Billionaire Heiress! And as ugly truths rear up their ugly heads, Damien realises he wants her back and she's actually the key to his sanity. But will Lana help him discover the peace he seeks? Or will she let him be devoured by the very pain he caused her?

Alpha Bennet's son Brian Bennet cannot get the human girl Sia out of his head. In his father's eyes, he has committed the grave sin of bringing a human and making her a werewolf without her permission. But they are all in for a surprise when Luna Kiara Bennet who is also a powerful witch utters a prophecy that Sia is not a human but a pureblood werewolf, just that she is not aware of it. The prophecy also predicts a grave danger to the whole pack and that she will lead them all to war. Despite the threat, Brian takes Sia as his mate as the moon Goddess' will and stands by her side in the greatest trial of all. A trial that demands blood be spilled not just from him but his entire pack

I am standing in front of the mirror only on my red skirt and blouse.He is wearing me a red saree.Tears are flowing from my eyes like nigra falls.After wearing me the saree,he sat me down in front of the mirror and started wearing me jewellery. He applied red lipstick on my lips and said seductively, "you look very fuckable in red colour."I replied crying, "please.Let me see my brother.He is very sick.Let me go to the hospital for once".Hearing me, he slapped very hard on my face and fisted my hair tightly.He said anger dripping from his voice,"you dare to talk back.Did you just forget your place in front of me.Tell me who you are?Tell me whom you belong? I hissed in pain and replied," I am your doll. I only belong to you. I am only yours" . . . Devika, A 20-year-old college-going girl was married to the mafia leader Abhinav. After her marriage, her husband started torturing her for some reason which she doesn't know. Will she ever come to know why she is being tortured?Join Abhinav and Devika's, bittersweet love journey and be a part of their journey.. . . Warning- Disturbing scene ahead like violence, rape and mental abuse. Read at your own risk. It's a work of fiction. So, kindly take it as fiction. English isn't my first language so apologizing in advance for grammatical errors.

Clay Nikolaidis: I don't know why everyone's so worried about me. I'm happy being single. H-A-P-P-Y, Happy. I don't understand why my twin sister thought her getting married and having my niece and nephew meant I felt left behind. Least of all, to the point that she decided I needed a dog… It’s a joke. She gave me a corgi and said he’s my new wingman. of a wingman, I've been striking out, and worse, just got evicted from my apartment. Now I'm staying at my cousin's place till I find a new one. This dog owes me. Xenia Rosario: I've loved everything about living in the Big Apple. Everything but my apartment seems to be big here. Shoebox apartment aside, I just became the owner of Tinkerbell, a therapy training dropout. Trust me when I say her name is meant to be ironic. She's bigger than me. This is probably how I got dragged through the park, and if I ever find the owner of that tiny dog who scared Tink, I'm giving them a piece of my mind. This is a standalone story but is the fifth book in the Ravenwood series. Book 1 - The Princess of Ravenwood Book 2 - Chasing Kitsune Book 3 - Expect The Unexpected Book 4 - Out Of My League Book 5 - Man's Best Wingman