Weird Pick Up Lines Novels & Stories

“And I want to court you to be my girlfriend.” Even worse! I shrugged my head in disapproval. “You’re joking.” “Do I look like it?” “You don’t look like a clown but damn, you have a talent to be one,” I spat in annoyance. “What did you even saw in me? I’m not even beautiful!” “You are! I was in fact, blinded by your dazzling beauty,” I frowned at his clichéd pickup line. It was so cheesy I wanted to puke again right now to turn him off. I always hated awkward moments like this.

"What? You think I don't mean it?" "I think pick-up lines are just so lame and overrated." I shrugged with yet another sip. Yes, let me get numb. "That's not true. There are some pretty good." "Not there aren't. They're all cheesy and predictable." "No, hear this one: did it hurt? When you fell from-" "-From heaven?" I finished for him and rolled my eyes. "You just proved my point."

“Borrow for a while, okay?” He looked at me like he thought I was high or something and then he nodded. I watched her. She was alone. Now, I wish I knew some pick-up lines. Or if I did, I knew how to use them effectively! But so far the only things that I could remember hearing around were: ‘Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?’ or ‘I lost my phone number, so can I have yours?’ and ‘If I say you have a wonderful body, will you hold it against me?’

“Oh, I’m sorry, are you trying to make me fall for you? Is that what this is?” I burst out laughing and rolled my eyes. “If it’s really not obvious then I’mgoing6 to have to bring back the pick-up lines.” “You like those lines, huh? Do they work for you a lot?” she asked, taking a sip of her wine as the waitress set it on the table. I nodded in answer. “Usually they never fail. You’re really denting my ego here, cupcake. Maybe you should cut me a little slack.” “Hmm, I don’t think so. Where would be the fun in that? You know you love me rejecting you.” She narrowed her eyes at me playfully as she leant back in her chair and studied her menu.

His lashes were super fleek. Are they even real? His eyebrows, bushy ones. Only if I get some amount of his lashes for me. Ahh, they are beautifully layered over his cheekbone. He slurped in a normal way and licked his lips. To my surprise, I did not feel any absurdity in his actions. "What you said?" He asked. His eyes stared at me while sipping his drink. "What I said?" "The pickup line you used on me" "I..i.. no, I didn't mean like that" I stuttered so bad.

I started reciting all the cringy, weird and perverted pick up lines I could think of, all the while watching the jerk King lose his cool. I put my hand over my heart to make my performance seem unfeigned, looking all touched and moved, a bit misty-eyed too. "DARLING, who'd have ever imagined you to be so naughty when you asked me if I sat in sugar because I've got such a sweet ass... I mean buttocks(I feared these primordials would mistake my ass for a donkey if I didn't enlightened them with the specifics). That I'm in all of your inappropriate..."

You might want to dial it back a little bit because I'm already obssessed. I was so red from blushing and I look like an idiot trying to keep my calm composure while I'm internally screaming and I'm fighting the urge to smile. He gently hold my cheeks, "It really works, huh? Damon's cheesy pick up lines to make you look cuter." That's unfair, that's a double kill from Dylan.

Then he opened his mouth, "you look like a mother! " What? What the hell I just heard! Did he lose his mind, from where she looks like a mother to him! She was like our's age for god sake, before I could say anything, again I heard! "And my friends call me motherfucker. " then he started chuckling! I facepalmed myself! He doesn't even know any decent pick-up line, and he was saying he can teach me humour! "Tell me again why are you with him? " I asked.

“And if I fail to give you 100 chemistry pickup lines?” “I will get to that later so do we have a deal?” “Yeah, I guess we do.” Dwight said as he brought his hand for a handshake. And that’s how my problems started, I thought he wouldn’t actually give me a 100 pickup lines, because for a while, he kept quiet and I thought I was victorious, hell I was already making planes of what I will tell him to do, but I didn’t know that he was just getting ready, now we are on number 84 and I have never been so frustrated since that holdup in traffic five years ago in Senegal. I already told him to stop, but his smart reply was we had a deal…. I made a deal with the fucking devil.

“Your balls.” “Okay I got you, Nick, I’mma stay behave. I’m going to keep my hands to myself” He smiled in absolute defeat. By now, he should already know that he can’t somersault me with his dumb pick-up lines. I got my pick-up lines too, and it’s always on point.