You're So Old Jokes

Scarlet blood trickled from my thigh as I clutched Arvin Owen's hand. "My belly... It hurts so much..." He shook off my hand indifferently. "Come on, I know it's chicken blood you are using. Debby just suffered abuse from her husband and is now in the hospital without anyone to care for her. Don't be so spoiled!" But what flowed from me was not chicken blood. It was my life slipping away.

After Roman Archer and I broke up, he devoted himself to academic research. He had finally become successful. During a television interview, he looked just as confident and high-spirited as he had been back then. The host asked whom he most wanted to share this news with. After a brief silence, he called me. “Celeste, thank you for leaving me. My career is thriving now.” I smiled. “Congratulations, Mr. Roman.” He would never know that if I had not left, he would have died.

Title: Married To An Old Billionaire, In Love With His Son. Eve has no choice but to give up her own dreams due to her father's illness and the expensive operational costs. So she married an old billionaire who is old enough to be her grandfather. Despite the sexual harassment she faces on a regular basis, the humiliation she receives from the old man's son, Liam is another source of pain for Eve. Then, Eve's only thought is to make as much money as she can and get away from the family. Nevertheless, as Liam works with Eve, he gradually falls in love with the girl he used to loathe. What will he do about his hidden feelings for his stepmother?

Book one of the zodia series introduces Lilliana Pendragon and Drake Thorn, two best friends who have deep unrealized feelings for each other. And Lance Stallion, a man who is betrothed to Lilliana and has a nasty temper when things do not go his way.Who will Lilliana find herself with in the end and can she unlock the secret of her family within herself to be able to find true happiness, before it is too late?'latin - 'Quamdiu tales esse potes. Cum autem terminos tuos sentio agi. Quum senseris tibi evigilare faciatis intra rem, et tamen non audiam. Princeps autem Draco excitavit!’

Past thirty, my usually serious husband suddenly developed a fascination with pink. The dark-colored furniture that had stayed the same for ten years was replaced with pink; even the utensils he picked up casually were pink. I stared at the line of pink pajamas, pink bow ties, and pink underwear hanging out to dry on the balcony, feeling something was off. "I thought you said you hated pink—that it was a color only women liked?" He was unpacking a new pink bed set and didn't even look up. "Oh, Jack and I made a bet. If I can replace everything in the house with pink, he'll give me his seaside villa for free. Honestly, after looking at it for a while, pink isn't that bad, don't you think?" I neither agreed nor disagreed. Instead, I called Jack, who blurted out, "What seaside villa? I don't remember ever buying one!"

Her life is a mess. Her father died from a car accident and her mother went away with another man. She was left in her exploitative and abusive relatives, her aunt and cousin. She is very poor and carries the world. They looked at her like a rag not until she was rescued by the forty-five years old Zillionaire. But little did she know, a rollercoaster twist of a life is waiting for her after she was rescued.

“I promised to grab you closer to myself” Alex grabbed Vivian closer as he was talking, and Vivian placing her soft breast on his chest. “Kiss your soft and small lips” Alex kissed Vivian’s lower lips as he was talking; Vivian closed her eye and her heart breathing heavily. “Kiss you deeply still we feel that love between---“Vivian suddenly pushed him away with force and step back, looking at him and she didn’t really get herself. “What happened? Have you been lying to me all these while that you LOVE?” Alex said with loud voice. “No! No!! I love you and you know that” Vivian said with low voice and shaking. “Then this is the time to prove it to me, why don’t you want me to have that kiss that I have been waiting for so long----“ “I MARRIED TO YOUR BROTHER NOW” Vivian said with low voice as Alex was talking. ×××××××× Vivian and Alex had been an online lover for three years but all of a suddenly, Alex just disappeared from Vivian and turned to a ghost on social media. Five years later, two of them met each other physically and Alex turned out to be her husband’s brother. Alex wanted the love back and despite to take her from his brother at all cost.

Two weeks before our wedding, Jonah Alston suddenly wants to postpone it. He says, "Sasha says she's having her first exhibition on that day. She'll be alone during the opening, and I'm worried she'll get stage fright. I have to help her. We're just going through the motions with the wedding, anyway. What does it matter whether it's a day earlier or later?" This isn't his first time postponing our wedding for Sasha Lester's sake, though. The first time he did it was because he claimed she missed having homecooked food after undergoing surgery. He'd flown abroad to care for her for two months. The second time was because he said she wanted to head into the mountains to get inspired. He'd gone with her out of concern for her safety. Now, this is the third time. I hang up and look at Austin Everett, my childhood sweetheart. He sits across from me, looking leisurely as he taps his emerald-embedded walking cane on the marble floor. I ask, "Do you need a wife?" On my wedding day, Sasha holds up her glass and waits for Jonah to clink it with his. However, his eyes are red as he watches a livestream—it's the wedding of the scion of Everett Group, the country's largest property development company.

You ruined me, now watch me bring down your great empire to crumbles.” she signed off her agreement on the contract slip. What happens when the famous billionaire unknowingly places the future of his business in the hands of the ex he broke?. **** Ace and Jasmine cross paths again after their romantic life went downhill seven years ago, following the scandal. He broke her heart. He humiliated her. She was expelled and ruined, and Ace wanted nothing to do with her anymore. Fast forward to seven years later, fate draws her back into his life. A rich boss. The sweetest piece of ass in New York, and the hottest musical celebrity around the city. Men just can't take their eyes off her. Fate has placed the balls in her court, with a chance at revenge when his empire offers her a contract and now, she will stop at nothing to take her revenge, especially after having a glimpse of how easygoing his current life is with his replacement of her. What happens when Ace finally recognizes her too? Deep dark secrets will be revealed but what will the future hold for them? Will Sparks return or were they never gone? ~ “I know we broke up…but I just can't seem to give you up….come back to me please….” He nuzzled his face in her neck, breathing in her calming scent. “I'd be a fool to make the same mistake again.” She pushed him away, glaring at him. ~ He wants her back. But then there's Veronica, his fiancee, pregnant for him...

My husband, Luca, had a childhood sweetheart named Sophia. Years ago, during a brutal gang shootout, Sophia shielded him from the worst of the bloodshed, and since then, she had suffered from severe PTSD. Because of that, Luca would push aside family business every year and fly to our estate on a secluded island off the coast of Sicily to spend three months “helping her recover.” “Victoria, she lost her mind because of me,” he told me. “I’m responsible for her. I hope you can be magnanimous.” So, I nodded. And eventually, I got used to the fact that every year, my husband would disappear for three months to fulfill what he called a moral obligation. That was until the day I flew in without warning to inspect the family’s money-laundering network on that island and saw him. In the town square, under the bright Mediterranean sun, Luca was standing there with a five-year-old boy by his side. “Papa, how long do we have to hide on this island?” the child asked. “I want to go to New York. I want to see the Empire State Building.” Luca laughed gently and scooped him up in his arms. With his other hand, he held Sophia’s. “Antonio, be good,” he said affectionately. “Papa’s position is… complicated. When you turn eighteen and pass the family’s initiation ceremony, I’ll kill that woman and her dead old man. Then, I’ll take you back to New York to inherit the entire Corleone family.” I stood in the shadows, unseen. Slowly, I lit a cigarette. The smoke curled around me as their voices drifted over, the conversation getting more vicious as it went. Sophia leaned into his chest, her tone sweet and coy. “Luca, I’ve been with you for seven years without a name or a title. How much longer are our son and I supposed to live like ghosts?” Luca sighed. “I don’t have a choice. The old man in the Corleone family is still alive. I married Victoria just to get her territory. Don’t worry. I’ve been adding something to her milk every day. She’ll never get pregnant in this lifetime. My family bloodline will only continue through you.” The last thread of reason in my mind snapped. In the six years of marriage we shared, I had been infertile. I’d taken countless hormone injections to stimulate ovulation. I’d knelt in church and prayed more times than I could count. Yet, all along, the devil poisoning me was my own husband. The initial shock faded quickly into rage. I crushed out my cigarette and pulled out my phone. Then, I dialed my uncle, the family’s clean-up man. “Uncle Rocco,” I said calmly, “Luca betrayed me. He betrayed the family. Order a coffin in the finest black walnut for me, and make it large, large enough to fit a family of three.”