MAMAW: Pahiram ng Kasalanan

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Storm

The air was thick with tension and fear, and I couldn’t control the panic which was beginning to consume me as I watched the scene playing out before me. My mother was terrified, that much I could tell. I could see she knew that this altercation wasn’t going to end well for any of us.

My father was an incredibly dangerous man. Anyone who knew him would tell you that two of his biggest faults were that he never listened to anyone, and that he always believed that he was right.

He controlled everybody around him almost like it was a game of chess.

My mother wasn’t allowed to have any friends. That was how we had ended up where we were right now. Her loneliness had finally pushed her to rebellion. My father had been having affairs for years. Long before he and my mother had ever met, let alone ended up together. In the time that they had been together, my mother had endured so much heart break at the hands of my father, the man who was supposed to love her, and protect her above all others. He had always made sure that my mother knew he was sleeping around. He had made her believe that it was all her fault that he was unfaithful. He had managed to convince her that he would never have had to sleep around with other women, if she had of been enough to satisfy him. My mother had told my sister and I, that the only reason my father had ever accepted her as his mate, was because she was an Alpha’s daughter. She said if that hadn’t been the case, he would never have accepted her as his mate. This was because, in the werewolf world, blood was everything. Alphas believe that if their mates possess Alpha, Beta, or Gamma blood, then the offspring they produce with their mates will be stronger than your average werewolf.

My mother had given my father two children, but even that accomplishment on her part wasn’t good enough for him. Her failure in his eyes, was that she hadn’t given him a son. He had made her life hell over that fact, and it had all started the moment my sister Winter had been born. He had told her that she was useless; and that since she hadn’t even been able to give him an heir to take over his position within the pack when he stepped down as Alpha, she was a failure as a pack Luna. But my father had soon fixed that problem. He had a son which was the result of one of the flings he had had, before he had ever met my mother. The guy’s name was Mason. The sad thing about Mason though, was the fact that he was just like my father. Mean, evil, controlling, violent, manipulative, and narcissistic. I just knew that he would be just like my father when he became pack Alpha. My father had already made it clear that Mason was going to be the next Alpha of our pack, and surprisingly enough, everyone within our pack had just accepted it.

My sister Winter and I knew that Mason leading the pack wasn’t going to do the pack any favours in the long run. Winter had also said that the only hope we had of getting away from Mason and my father, was to meet our mates and hope that they were from other packs. By werewolf law, a female meeting her mate meant that she was to go and live in her mate’s pack, no questions asked. The only time this didn’t happen, was when an Alpha’s daughter was the only surviving member of her family, and she had to lead her pack. With Mason being named Alpha after our father stepped down, this didn’t apply to Winter and me, so once we met our mates, we would be free. Provided they were from other packs of course.

Winter was looking forward to finding her mate, for her finding her mate meant freedom, but as for me, I hoped I never did. Over the years my father had shown me that mates weren’t all they were cracked up to be in the stories we were told. Truth be told, he had made me wonder if the stories we had always heard about mates were even real. He had beaten my mother and abused her mentally and verbally every day of my life. It didn’t help that I knew that the abuse she had endured had been going on longer than I had been alive. My mother had cried herself to sleep every night, from the pain he put her through. When she had realised that my father was never going to change, and he was never going to love her, she had finally rebelled, and had gone and found love elsewhere.  

My mother had started spending time with my father’s younger brother. Uncle Brad hadn’t found his mate yet. And even though they weren’t mates, my uncle loved my mother. He knew how my father treated her, and it had never sat well with him. Uncle Brad treated my mother the way a man was supposed to treat a woman. He treated her like a princess. And most importantly, he made her happy. When they were together, she laughed more than I had ever seen her laugh in my life. Seeing her happy made me and Winter happy.

And now, here we were. Our night had started off great. We had been having an enjoyable evening, we had all been laughing and having a great time. My father was out of town, and just like any other time that he was away, we felt free. We could all finally relax, and we all felt like we could breathe once more. And ever since mom and uncle Brad had gotten together, the moment my father left, my uncle came over.

But the happiness of that evening had been cut short when my father had come home unannounced and found my uncle and my mother together. The moment he had stormed into the lounge room and seen my mother and my uncle cuddled up together on the couch, laughing and giggling, he had lost it. Before Winter and I could blink, my father had lunged at my uncle and ripped him off the lounge throwing him down to the floor. They had begun to fight on the lounge room floor, and as they fought, my mother had been screaming at them, and trying to get them to stop. Winter and I had sat frozen in place on the lounge chair, and watched in horror, as the man we hated the most in the world, had killed the man we had loved like a father. As we had looked at the body of my uncle laying there lifeless on the floor, my father had grabbed my mother around the neck, slamming her onto the floor. As he braced himself, leaning over her, and gripping onto her throat, he looked into her face, his eyes filled with such hatred.

“You fucking whore!” he screamed at her.

“And you’re not?” she had choked out, smirking at him.

“You fucked around on me, with my own brother! Are you fucking kidding me?” he screamed in rage.

“You fucked around on me with how many women? You parade your bastard son around here like he is some kind of prince. Well… let me tell you something. He will never be better than my girls. His whore mother didn’t have top three blood. She was just a trashy nobody! My girls have better blood then he ever will!” she stated, levelling him with an icy glare.

“Once I have killed you, I will kill them too. The three of you can go to hell and be with my no-good brother,” he retorted.

“Oh no, we have already been living in hell with you all this time, anywhere we go in the afterlife is bound to be heaven after having lived with you,” she stated, giggling.

Winter and I watched as he gripped her throat harder. The moment he did, my mother’s face showed the fear she had been trying so hard to hide. I grabbed onto Winter’s hand and gripped it hard as I watched what was happening right in front of me. I didn’t want to believe that my father was someone who could kill his own mate; but given how he had treated her all these years, I guess it shouldn’t have surprised me that he was able to do something that horrible.

My mother died that night. Afterwards… mine and Winter’s life within that house had become a living hell unlike anything I could have ever imagined. The beatings and abuse that my mother used to receive became ours to bear, but we also endured so much more.