Of All The Forbidden

Bakit ba masarap ang bawal?Bawal na pagkain, bawal na gawain, bawal na tanawin, bawal na pag-ibig at kung anu-ano pang bawal sa buhay?"Blessed me Father for I have sinned," I bent down and then adjusted the black veil that hung over my head.Pilit kong tinatakpan ang aking mukha. Sinisigurong kahit labi ko ay hindi niya makikita. Sapat na ang boses ko lang. Hindi ko mawaring gagawin ko ito sa tana ng buhay ko. "It has been five years since my last confession.""Go on my daughter and tell me your sins," the priest's voice was calm and comforting.It was unfamiliar. That was by design— I'd driven ten miles from my apartment to a church in the middle of woods. It was easier that way. I took in a deep breath, but only a squeak came out."Get it over with," I told myself. How ironic. I could feel a bead of sweat dripping down my forehead. The weather is cold but this is how

"You are being bull-headed again, Aviona! Kailan ka ba magtitino?!" Papa's voice thundered. His face flushed red. I was confined in the hospital for two days. Mayroon akong benda sa ulo dahil sa aparatong tumama sa akin. Putok din ang labi ko at may mga maliliit na sugat sa mukha gawa ng bubog nang tumama ito sa akin.Ngayon ay kakauwi ko palang sa bahay at sermon agad niya ang bumungad sa akin. He never visits me in the hospital. I don't care, though. His presence seemed to buzz around me. Every word, movement and breath he performed seemed to infuriate me to no end.My face remained blank. I don't want to show him that I'm annoyed at him right now. "You are grounded for the whole month! No phone and other gadget! Mag-reflect ka sa mga ginawa mo! You're a disgrace!" Nanggagalaiti pa rin niyang sabi.Bumuntong-hininga ako. Kinuyom ko ang aking kamao sa galit at nagpipigil sa sariling magsalita sa kaniya pabalik. I was expecting for this to happen kaya hindi na ako nabigla. One month

I woke up feeling nauseous. Masakit rin ang katawan ko. Nang ipagparte ko ang dalawang hita ko ay mas lalo akong napaigik sa sakit.I saw blood on my bed sheet."Sh*t!" Wala sa sariling tinanaw ko ang katawan ko sa ilalim ng kumot. May damit na ulit ako. Parang walang nangyari. Pero masakit ang gitna ko. Did it really happened? Did I just gave my virginity to a stranger?Napahilamos ako ng mukha nang maalala ang nangyari kagabi. I can still remember it clearly. Wala na akong magagawa. Nangyari na.Napangiti ako nang sumagi sa balintataw ko ang gwapong mukha ni Lazarus. Wala naman akong panghihinayang.Our lips and tongues crashed together as we tried to set down our beers without spilling them.Our arms embraced each other as we pressed our bodies together."You're such a temptation, Aviona..." He said in the middle of our kiss.The side of my lips rose. I broke our kiss and started working my way down his neck, as I pushed him back and climbed on top of him.He moaned as I worked my

"Ang gwapong pari nitong si Lazarus, Alfonso. Mukhang maraming magsisimba kapag siya ang magmimisa." pabirong sabi ni Papa.Nagtawanan ang dalawang matanda. Habang hindi ko man lang makuhang ngumiti sa sinabi niya.Hindi nakakatawa. Hindi ako natutuwa. Wala rin akong mabasang emosyon sa mukha niya. Hindi ko alam kung nakailang paikot ako ng mga mata. Inis na inis. Hindi ko siya magawang ngitian o pansinin. Nag-iinit ang dugo ko sa kanya at gusto kong magwala sa inis. Idagdag pa ang hindi ako nakokontento sa juice na iniinom ko ngayon. Nakakaputangina ang nalaman ko. Gusto ko ng beer! Gusto kong uminom! Nakakapikon!"Matagal pa bago mangyari iyan, Avelino. Hindi pa iyan tapos mag-aral. Bakasyon nila sa seminaryo ngayon." Mr. Alfonso answered.Tinignan ko ng masama ngayon si Lazarus. Saktong kanina pa pala niya akong tinititigan. Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay. Hindi man lang niya sa akin ito sinabi? Bakit kailangan ko pang malaman sa ganitong paraan?!Malamlam naman ang mga mata niya ha

I nuzzled my face closer to his just to feel the warmth of his breath on my face.Even if I'm confused, discouraged, or scarred from previous relationships- I will give this wonderful person a chance. He's ready to give me everything my heart has wanted.He embrace the chaos, embrace the unknown, embrace the unfamiliar and make things seem possible. He make things look easy and make life a little brighter just because he believe things will eventually work out. He always told me things will fall into place. Things won't always be dark and grey because life is beautiful and vivid and can sometimes be full of wonderful surprises."What do you like to eat?" he randomly asked.I wrapped myself in a cocoon, slowly throwing my leg further over his body and intertwining it with his."Your dick," I answered playfully. We both chuckled. Inayos niya ang pagkakayakap niya at nagpatuloy sa paghaplos sa akin. His other hand went to my upper abdomen, almost touching my underboob. Kanina pa kami