Something I Shouldn’t Feel

[Astoria’s POV]

A part of me berated my thoughts earlier.

It wasn’t like I was a wallflower. I had received a fair share of attention before, even after getting into a relationship with Shawn. I understood what certain looks meant, and Viktor had felt like that.

Attention. Intense attention and maybe even recognition.

Which was weird because I had never met him. Vladimir was popular, sure, but he was…I had never seen his images in any magazines. I didn’t know if it existed anywhere in the business articles online, though.

However, that recognition part was what unsettled me.

Once Vladimir showed me to my room and left, I was suddenly feeling more lost than I felt before. First of all, the room was bigger and almost the size of the apartment I shared with Shawn. There was even an ensuite washroom, and everything inside just screamed luxury.

I looked down at myself, still in work clothes, which looked dirty and dull in comparison to all this. Secondly, I was feeling a bit anxious because I hadn’t met my mother yet, although she was reassured by Vladimir.

What if this was all fake and I was brought here to be sold or something? Even the thought made me shudder.

‘It’s okay…I will wait for the next morning.’ I calmed myself.

Thankfully, dinner was given to me in my room.

When I lay down on the extremely soft bed, sleep evaded me. Emotions tangled together as my thoughts drifted to Shawn and my ex-best friend, their betrayal, and then this…this whole mess of my mother just getting hitched to some billionaire.

It felt like everyone’s life was on track except mine.

‘I will find a way to survive once again,’ I thought.

But then it occurred to me that I wouldn’t be able to go to work, so quickly I picked up my phone and texted my manager.

It was then that my eyes fell on the homescreen wallpaper. A close shot of Shawn and my hand interlocked. Despite not wanting to cry, tears welled up in my eyes. I hurriedly went over and changed the wallpaper to a default one.

On impulse, I headed over to the gallery and cleared it up, deleting the photos from the trash bin as well.

By then, my vision had blurred because I was sobbing. Five years of wasting my time, love, and energy on a man whose excuse for cheating was that I wasn’t ‘wife material’.

I put my phone away and closed my eyes, finally letting the exhaustion take over.

~~~~

The next morning, I dressed carefully, not because of him, of course, that would be very odd, but because I wanted to make a good impression and come off as not someone who has been living from one pay cheque to another.

But still, the plain pair of denims and a flowy pink sleeveless top failed to make me look like I belonged in this kind of room.

I gave a once-over at the full-length mirror, making sure that I didn’t look like someone who had cried to sleep before pocketing my phone and leaving the room.

When I was near the stairs, I heard voices drifting up from the floor below.

One calm and controlled. The other was deeper.

Without meaning to, I stepped back to listen.

"...but still, you should have told me before bringing her here,” the deeper voice said.

Viktor.

The sound of his voice, the deep rumble that somehow exuded authority, did something uncomfortable to my pulse.

‘He is your step-brother,’ I reminded myself.

“She is Evelyn’s daughter, so it was a given that she would be here,” Vladimir argued.

I couldn’t help but smile. I never had anyone who could remotely defend me, but if this protectiveness came along with a step-sibling, then I would take it.

“She is human…unlike her,” Viktor said, his voice somehow having an angry undertone.

The word landed differently than it should have.

Human. But unlike….who?

What even…Weren’t we all humans? Eh?

I stepped forward before I could question myself and descended the stairs.

Both men went silent as if they could hear my footsteps, which shouldn’t be possible given that the steps were carpeted and I was wearing pump shoes.

Vladimir turned first, his expression smoothing over. He smiled as if he wasn’t just discussing me.

Viktor followed a fraction later, and the moment his eyes landed on me, whatever tension had been in his posture sharpened instead of going away. His cerulean blue eyes narrowed slightly.

It wasn’t a surprise. But the sheer hostility in the look made me want to know the reason.

Was he thinking that I would claim their property or something now that my mother would become the mistress of this mansion?

The mere thought made me want to laugh.

“Good morning,” I said, pushing back those thoughts.

Vladimir inclined his head politely. Viktor did not answer.

“So…uhm…where’s my mother?” I ignored Viktor deliberately and smiled at Vladimir.

I could almost feel the burning gaze on the side of my head.

“She is in the dining room, waiting. I was about to go get you,” Vladimir answered, his lips curling up.

Vladimir was probably the real-life version of fictional men. So far at least. But the fact that my mother wasn’t even eager to meet me was…not surprising but disappointing nonetheless.

“Come, let’s go,” he said.

I glanced at Viktor, and then looked back at Vladimir. “Lead the way.”

~~~~

“Ash,” Mom’s gushing out greeting was anything but genuine. She was wearing too much makeup, expensive, but too much, early in the morning. Her hug was so tight that it made me suffocate for a moment, but I hugged back out of courtesy.

“This is Matthew,” Mom introduced me to her soon-to-be husband. The man looked like the older version of Viktor than Vladimir, even though all three shared the same eye and hair color. Vladimir’s features were somehow less rugged than Viktor and Matthew’s.

Throughout breakfast, my mother chatted happily about floral arrangements and guest arrivals, blissfully unaware of the charged current running across the table, or rather between Viktor and me.

Vladimir participated with easy composure, answering her questions, keeping the atmosphere light. He seemed as if he had already accepted her position as his father’s new wife. Matthew, too, was pretty chill, giving his input and also fondly glancing at my mom now and then.

Unsurprisingly, Viktor barely spoke.

He sat opposite me, posture rigid without appearing tense, silently eating. He did not glance around the room.

But I could feel the tension roll off of him as I did the same—ate and remained silent

There is something uniquely disarming about being subtly observed by someone who is not trying to charm you. But then again, what did the intensity mean?

And why was I…a newly single woman feel something…which I shouldn’t feel towards my step-brother?

At one point, as I reached for the jug containing orange juice at the same time as him, my fingers brushed the side of his hand.

It was a light touch. Accidental.

But my reaction was anything but.

Something sharp shot up my arm, not pain or heat, but something electric and alive. My breath hitched. His hand went still beneath mine for a fraction of a second before he pulled away as if the contact had been deliberate.

But the last bit was purposeful on his end.

Our eyes met.

His pupils had darkened, not with anger, but with something far more primal. Something that made the air between us feel thin, and forget that there were three other people in the room.

“Careful,” he said quietly.

The word carried weight.

It wasn’t spoken out of care; it felt more like a warning.