chapter 1

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‎Ryo......

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‎" First I would love to make a huge toast to the bride and groom, my Best friend".

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‎The words came out so clam and so cool just like I practiced, I don't know if my voice betrayed me or not but nobody cares,  either ways all eyes were on me  and I had nowhere to go.

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‎I raised my glass up to give a toast to the couple.  I looked up  catching up  the warm glow of the  Chandler  above us,  the hall was packed, white beautiful flowers lines , soft music playing behind me.

‎Everything looks like it belongs to a wedding magazine.

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‎David stood  at the middle of it  all, looking handsome and confident with his white suit. And eve stood beside him  looking flawless, resting her hands on his arms.

‎The look perfect together. 

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‎I forced myself to smile. 

‎I have known David for 15 years I said smiling. 

‎We met at high school actually David was my first friend in  high school. 

‎I never In this life imagine I would one day stand here at his own wedding giving a speech. 

‎Soft laughter   could be heard in the background. 

‎David stare at  me with that familiar look, of trust  and fondness, the look he had always given me, the look that make always me think the way I shouldn't . 

‎In those 15 years I have seen David angry side, and I can bet u that side ain't funny I said laughing, I have seen his stressed, and I have seen his kind, and loyal ways ready to give out the whole world to people who he loves.

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‎My fingers tighten around my glass cup.

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‎He  cares for people, I added but sometimes annoying  you know I said.

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‎David  laughed  shaking his head while someone clapped.

‎The mood stayed light but  no one knew what those words meant to me.

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‎  "And then eve came along"

‎I turned to her  and she net my gaze and her eyes looks like a child who just found out the usefulness of legs.

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‎" Eve understand him" I said.

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‎"she sees him in a way that we don't".

‎She makes him happy and that is what matters to us.

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‎The words were to polite  at least I tried to convince myself so.

‎" the found each other so quickly" I said. But sometimes when  you know, you know I added.

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‎So here's a toast to David and eve,  I finished, may your marriage last longer, may your life filled with happiness and joy, and understanding I raised my glass higher, forcing a smile in my face.

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‎The room erupts  into applause, glass click and drums played.

‎And David pull eve into a kiss and Carma's   were all over there faces.

‎I drank my  drink in  one shallow.

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‎When I stepped down from the  stage  my  legs feels a  little but shaky, I felt myself so  I won't embarrass myself. when,  I got my sit, David reach out to me and thank me.

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‎"  thank you so much Ryo"

‎" that meant a lot he said".

‎Of course I replied.

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‎He had  no idea that I have been hiding this feelings for  a long time, hiding my secret from everyone, because I don't want to ruin our friendship.

‎I never once imagine he look at me the way I look at him when ever he talks.

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‎So I did my role to play the perfect best friend to him, some one he could lean to when troubles comes knocking.

‎Everything was going perfectly.

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‎Until eve came along.

‎She came out of nowhere, a late night work dinner to  a few conversation, and Kate night call. Then suddenly  David is singing  love song all over.

‎" she just gets me "  ryo I can't explain how,  it just felt right he said.

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‎Three months later, he proposed to her, I  congratulated them, because that's what Best friend does right?.

‎I even helped him to pick up the wedding rings   and stay beside him aggranging every preparation for the wedding.

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‎Nowhere I'm standing in the

‎Middle of his wedding  reception waiting watching him go for his future that I would never be part of.

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‎I sat down reach for another drink.

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‎Eve eyes caught my attention from far across the table and she gave me the sweetest smile.

‎The one that would make people love her, trust her.

‎She walked up to me and Said "hey great speech".

‎"Thank you " I  replied.

‎You must know  David that well she said.

‎" I do " I said.

‎She smiled too wildly, her smile was a forced smile, " I can tell' she said.

‎There is  something about the way  she said it, that made my chest tighten,

‎It doesn't feel  like a praise it felt some how,  I can't tell  but it felt creepy.

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‎All through the night she was polite and attentive, at least on the surface.

‎She asked so many questions, like  how was my work In the hospital, and nooded seriously any time I spoke, she  thank me for being for David through out this years, any body who sees her will think she was very greatful and kind.

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‎But I noticed what others didn't.

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‎Any time David turned away, something in her changes  especially in her eyes, her eyes lackes  warmth, what was replaced wasn't anger but colder than that.

‎While, David  was busy  to talking with a relative,  she came leaning closer to me, too close, with her cooky smile, she whispered something only I could here.

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‎" David talks about you a lot," she said.

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‎"Does he" I said.

‎I felt my body  sitffend.

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‎" yes he does"  she replied, "you are very important to him"

‎" I tried to be there for him." I said trying to keep my tune neutral.

‎Her gazed longer more than usual, " that's obvious."

‎Then her smile shifted to something ugly.

‎You have been there for him for too long, longer than me.

‎She tilted her head, " sometimes I wonder if he rely on you too much".

‎My hands tighten "I and David grew up together."

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‎" I know David told me everything."

‎That was a lie, actually David never tell her anything, and she knows that too.

‎Her fingers touch my  arms  lightly, someone might think it was a friendly touch, but it wasn't.

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‎" it be must have so hard." She said.

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‎" hard?" I responded.

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‎She smiled wilder. " watching him build his life with someone else.

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‎The words hit harder  than  I expected.

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‎I felt my heart burned,  Sharp  and sudden, and  I had to force myself to breathe normal.

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‎She still stayed play her role, smiling and acting cute and kind.

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‎I'm really happy for him I respond.

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‎" oh I'm sure you are" she replied lovely. " you always been there for him."

‎There it was "Gratitude",  wait no it sounds like a warning.

‎Before I could say anything David turned to us, and eve, straighten.

‎Placing her hand around his  waist, pressing her lips to his lips, acting like she never said anything.

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‎Ryo was telling me about the hospital, she said.

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‎David smiled, his the best.

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‎Her fingers tighten around his first just for only my noticed.

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‎She leaned her head against David shoulders, eyes still on me, her  smile clam and satisfied  like she had said what she wanted saying.

‎And she was right.

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‎I sat there nodding, smiling when expected, my hand clench under the table.

‎Watching them acting lovey dovey makes me look smaller, and my crush reduce to a burden.

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‎The reception went blurry  after that, David pulled eve into the dance fall, David spinning her, and both of them acting like nothing else matters.

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‎I stayed watching.

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‎At some point David came to me,

‎" Comon man, come to the dance floor."

‎"Maybe later."

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‎He nodded okay dude.

‎He went back to eve, as soon as she waved at him.

‎I watched them dance, I watched the way he looks at her, like she was his space, like she fitted into his world.

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‎I felt a string of pain in my chest.

‎I slipped out quietly.

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‎I walked outside the street  with knowing we're I was heading too just putting a distance between me and the wedding hall, I could no longer were the music or laughter.

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‎There was a club next to the wedding hall, I didn't hesitate, I just went in to night need a two or more than one drink.

‎Inside it was dark, with a soft glow of red light that matches the soft music that was playing, it was perfect so I oder a drink or two.

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‎I lost count, as time passed away  strangely, at some point my phone was rang but I was too drunk to pick up so Ignore it.

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‎"It looks like u attending a wrong celebration " a voice said, I was lost deep in my feelings that I don't know when someone sat beside me.

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‎I turned my head around to see the person, but my heart skipped.

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‎David?

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‎" you not suppose to be here" after concluding it was him. The thought of he coming to  after me made my heart beat even more faster.

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‎He raised an eyebrow "I'm I not?".

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‎" you just got married" I said.

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‎" did I?" He studied clearly amused.

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‎" yes" I said frowning " to eve"

‎His lips turned into a  slow  smile, I didn't notice how different his smile was, how much colder his lips turned into, unlike his  usual   ray of  sunlight  beam.

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‎"You have had a lot to drink" he said.

‎" probably" I admitted and took another sip anyways.

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‎" you look so miserable "  he continued.

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‎"Do I ?" I asked.

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‎" very".

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‎I laughed softly " good".

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‎" Why are u here?", he lean back watching me.

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‎" just need some air" I replied

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‎"That much sir?." He asked, I didn't reply.

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‎" you are avoiding something". He said.

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‎I looked at him really looked at him.

‎Something felt off about him maybe it was just " marriage vibe."

‎Or maybe it was the drink, my head was spinning  and my heart was too broken to care.

‎"You always notice something" I muttered.

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‎He smiled again, " Do i."

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‎"Yes" I said, "you always do."

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‎He didn't correct me.

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‎You shouldn't be here, you be with eve preparing for your honeymoon, I told him.

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‎" and what about you" he said.

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‎I don't matter, I said.

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‎For a brief moment his expression changed.

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‎"That is not true." He said, I left a smile.

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‎Come with me, he  leaned closer, I could smell his cologne, it was a mixture of wood and drink or was it sex.

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‎I frowned " were."

‎" Somewhere just the two of us."

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‎I hesitate, part of me thinks this was a mistake , and was this part that was tired and weak.

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‎I didn't know when I said okay.

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