Best Tagalog Jokes

Fancy has always been a nerd and a plus-sized girl who is despised by her peers and classmates, especially for how shapeless she is. She didn't pay much attention to how she looks until her crush broke her heart by referring to her as “hard work,” to her brother. Fancy becomes heartbroken and vows to work on herself. Years later, with persistence she becomes beautiful with the right curves. Not only that, her high school crush becomes fascinated by her. He is head over heels for her or at least she thought until the unimaginable happens. Her mother is accused of murder by her boyfriend, and it dawned on her that he approached her just for revenge. How can fancy handle such a mighty blow thrown at her? Her mother, a murderer and her loving boyfriend seeking revenge on her family?

Blurb: Pakiramdam ni Graeson Santillan, may kulang pa sa sarili niya kaya hindi niya magawang magseryoso sa buhay. Kaya hinanap niya ang sarili niya. Nilibang din niya ang sarili sa mga babae, bar hopping, car racing at iba pa. Pero gano’n pa rin ang pakiramdam niya kaya nagdesisyon siyang sumama sa kaibigang si Isagani pauwi ng probinsya, baka sakaling mahanap niya ang sarili doon. Hindi niya akalaing magiging wild ang unang gabi niya sa bayang iyon. Isa yata iyon sa hindi niya malilimutang karanasan. Pero minalas siya dahil basta na lang siya iniwan ng babaeng nakaniig na nagngagalang Beth. Hindi pa naman niya nakita nang malinaw ang totoong itsura nito. Hinanap niya ito ng mga sumunod na araw pero walang nakakakilala sa kanya. Saka naman dumating sa buhay niya ang Ate Athena ni Isagani, na matanda sa kanya ng anim na taon. Ginulo din nito ang naguguluhang puso niya, na mas lalong nagulo nang makatanggap siya nang balita tungkol kay Beth…

“Omega, in about an hour, you’ll feel warm, dizzy, and overcome with hormones in your body.” I paled. “What happens after it takes effect?” “Then an alpha in the surrounding area will react to your scent.” After an hour, the nurse popped her head in. She had a strange look in her eyes and I didn’t like it. “So he is out there?” The nurse’s smile fell, “No, not one.” My eyes widened. “two?” “No, you have four mates.” I shook my head. “No, that’s not possible!” She sighed and opened her phone. “Your mates are as follows; Colby Mcgrath, Rain Kim, Matthew Clark, and Jade Johnson.” When she said the first name I started to feel faint but then the nurse kept rattling off all the names of my tormenters for years. How could I be tied to all of my brother’s friends? My panties got wet, I refused to accept that this was a hormonal reaction.

There was blood on his hands, and something worse in his eyes. And it terrified her to death. --- Crystal Peterson's only crime was to fall in love with her brother's best friend, Jaden Astor. She thought he loved her, too. Until he came back home one day with Valerie, the woman he was going to marry in two weeks. Already pregnant and disowned by her adoptive family, Crystal ran away from home without even a word to Jaden. Five years later, Crystal and her son, who had a terminal illness, were barely surviving and trying to make ends meet when she answered a knock on her door one day and found the one man she would rather stay away from all her life standing there and begging for her forgiveness. But forgiveness was something Crystal never had to offer Jaden. Not when she had to sell one of her twins just to keep the other twin alive. Not after being disowned and mocked by her family and everyone she once held dear, loosing everything she ever worked for, including her education. But what happens when she finds out who had actually bought one of her twins four years ago? Does she have a place for Jaden in her heart anymore, or she'd rather stick to Noah, the only man who was ever there for her when her world crumbled to the ground? *** Obsession. Possession. Love. Betrayal.

I lost my job, but I got hired into a new one. This time… my job is to be the mistress I hated the most. “Be my mistress... take it or take it?” — Shaun Kamikaze Del Valle.

After being left alone, Agent Hana Alijo became ruthless, aloof and unfriendly, she doesn't want to be attached... not until a charismatic and handsome multi-billionaire Clay Smith came and turned her life upside down. *** Hana Alijo A.K.A Lilium is a secret agent from Equilibrium Organization. She is known in her organization as hot and deadly. She's strong and persistent not until she became a personal bodyguard of Clay Smith. The man dared and made her knees weak, made her body numb with no exception. Lilium became coward and helpless when he's around. He tortured her mind and as well as her heart. What she thought was a simple duty turned out to be a complex and dangerous one. How can she fight it when her heart is at stake? The Hana who doesn't want to be with anyone seems to have become vague. She's doomed! Disclaimer: This story is written in combination of Tagalog and English Cover designed by Sheryl S.|SBS

In my past life, my mate Marcus ran off to the forest to make love with my best friend Scarlett, who was eight-month pregnant. That’s when they'd be surrounded by a pack of rogue wolves. Scarlett, heavy with child, started bleeding heavily. Both of them desperately called for the Border Guard. As the Chief Warrior, I had risked everything to fight those rogue wolves. But Scarlett still died along with her unborn pup. My mate Marcus led others to accuse me of using my position for personal revenge. He personally severed both my hands with a silver blade. "A warrior without morals like you deserves to burn in hell!" he snarled. But I remembered clearly—when I drove off the rogues and got the pack healer to Scarlett, she barely had a scratch on her. Finally, Scarlett's parents arrived. I begged them to examine her body and investigate the truth. Instead, they reported to Alpha that I had neglected my duties. They claimed I was high on wolfsbane while guarding the border. Alpha exiled me for fifteen years. With both hands severed, I had no way to fight or shift properly. I survived by begging scraps from neighboring territories. Fifteen years later, I returned to the pack. I saw my mate Marcus walked through the airport's first-class terminal with Scarlett and their son. They were using my inheritance to fund their luxury vacation to the Maldives. They spotted me. Without hesitation, they pushed me into a silver pit to destroy all evidence. When I opened my eyes again, I was back to the day Scarlett faked her death. This time, I took one look at the scene and declared them beyond saving. I told my assistant to send them to bury them directly.

Being a doctor is not an easy task, well, all kinds of job is not easy. For a neurosurgeon like Dr. Helen Grace Rosario her job is like living in hell, 24/7 duty and unendingly medical charts needed to review. Together with the monstrous superiors keep on demanding. In spite of, hardship she lived up beyond her expectations through her hard works, talent and excellent skills in her work field.Dr. Rosario have all the luck that she never expected: the career and the love life with Dr. Kim Salvador, the hot and handsome cardiologist and the heir of St. Martin’s Hospital where they both working. She never thought that luck be out of her side not until her marriage in heaven fall out of place. Her marriage and her mental state was totally at wreck. Because of her desire to escape the horrible reality, she was brought back to the year 1882 where she met Joaquin.What will happen to the unexpected encounter of the past and present? What might be the consequences of this encounter into their lives? Let’s find out how Helen and Joaquin will put every thing into place.

“We shouldn’t be doing this,” his raspy voice dripped with lust and uncertainty as his eyes scanned my exposed cleavages, “your father…” “Shhh.” I stopped him mid-way, placing my finger on his soft lips, “We both want this. I have seen the way you look at me, Mr. Richard. Do not hold back now.” I whispered sultrily. He swallowed hard and I saw him clench his well-chiseled jaws. I opened my mouth to continue my protest when all of a sudden, he grabbed me by the waist, pulled me closer and covered my lips with his in the hungriest manner ever. My body melted, succumbing to his burning desire. *** He was my father’s childhood best friend. He was always there for me since I lost my mother at the age of four. My father grieved hard and found it difficult to recover for many years, so Mr Richard was the father figure I had. However, he left the country after my thirteenth birthday and I almost forgot about him until he returned. I had turned twenty-one and when I laid my eyes on him, all my childhood memories came rushing back. But that wasn’t all there was. I noticed how hot and sexy he looked for that age and how his gaze lingered way too long on my mature body. And then, fate kept bringing us together, all I had to do was call on him. He was just being nice, right? Nothing more should have happened but my body refused to listen to my brain. I wanted him! I wanted him around me all the time, I wanted him to whisper in my ears and punish me accordingly if I did something wrong… I wanted him INSIDE ME.

"Don't deny it. You want it." Killian said to me, stroking the nape of my neck with his thumb. His face is so close to mine and I forgot to breathe. I gasped when he pushed my dress higher, revealing my thighs to him and let his hands rest between my thighs. I tilted my head to the side to avoid his lustful gaze, penetrating deep into my soul. "Your body craves it." He said, firing kisses down my neck till his lips touched my hard, naked nipples. That sent shivers down my spine. My body erupted with goosebumps and I exhaled sharply. I want to speak, but I can't. He has that much effect on me. His tongue played with my nipples and I mewled. That felt so good. "You want me as much as I want you." He whispered with his lips pressed on my skin. I shouldn't be doing this. I know I should stay away from this man but how can I when he invades my thoughts daily? When he's the only one my body wants. It's frustrating because no matter how hard I try, I can't say no to him. And I am this close to making the worst mistake of my life. I swallowed, trying to fathom the words out.His fingers brushed my core and I jerked forward, pressing my body on his. "I don't want you." "You're lying." He said, playing with the strap of my thong with a lazy finger. My eyes rolled back in my socket with pleasure. I am lying but he's making it so hard. "We shouldn't be doing this, Killian." Killian? Do I really have the right to call him that? "Give me one reason why and I won't touch you." "Because you're my best friend's Fiance."