Dark Humor Hypothetical Questions Novels & Stories

And I really am pissed. “Aren't you going to ask how we are holding up? The state of the company, and what we are doing to get it back to stability again?” You know, forget this acerbic, beamy smirk on my lips that is enough to light up this room. If only my child was not sleeping some distance away from me, this room’s walls would be shaking from the echoes of my laughter. Like, seriously? How absurd her stupid rhetorical questions are! How cliche!

It was wild and crazy, like he had heard the funniest joke in the world. He laughed so hard that I started to feel scared. What was so funny about my question? When Adrian finally stopped laughing, he looked at me with eyes that seemed almost insane. “A good person?” he repeated. “You want to know if Lucan is a good person?” I nodded, even though his reaction was making me nervous.

"Humor me, West. Why would the opposite of green be pink?" "AHA!" He beamed, "Why will it not be pink?" "Uh..." Did he just end up asking the same question? "I do not know." "Guess." I raised an eyebrow and shrugged my shoulders. I told him my unsure answer. "Because it is uh, pink...?" He chuckled deeply and this mysterious look sparkled in both of his eyes. "Why?" Creeped out, I raised both of my arms up in defeat and asked him awkwardly, "Whyyy are you asking me these questions?

She chuckled and then broke into delighted laughter. He grinned. “You get that I’m joking?” “Well, of course you’re joking. Vomity ones.” She laughed again. “Too funny.” “Most people don’t get my jokes. Say they’re inappropriate.” He finger-quoted inappropriate. “Are they idiots?” “Arguably.” She laughed again. “A woman who gets my jokes…” His pleased little grin turned into a broad smile. “Can I buy you a coffee sometime? Or a jet?” “A jet?” She laughed until her stomach ached and she had to bend over with her hands on both knees to catch her breath. “You’re killing me.”

She deadass did save my life but something in the back of my mind kept telling me that was not the reason I was agitated to meet her. "Then tell me what the fuck the reason is, you stupid brain." I yelled into my pillow, muffling the sound to the point where it almost sounded non-existent. I'm not one to play mind games, I just wanted to know the reason. Did you get the pun there? I'm so fucking funny. I know you're shaking your head thinking of what a stupid pun that was. But you know it was fucking lit. Maybe I should go into Comedy instead, I'm too funny for Urban/Realistic/Drama. Imagine my next stop being called Life of Eve: Comedy and Puns. What do you think?

Life’s so unfair, man. “What does a spoon matter when we’re literally stuck in the middle of the woods with invisible monsters, shady, bad men and whatever else creeps around here? Can you please, for once, use your brain and kick some sense in the gear?” He whisper-hisses, so red in the face, he reminds me of a tomato. “You could join a casting for vegetable commercials looking like this,” I remark and laugh at the brilliant joke my brain just reacted. Shit, am I not the funniest guy out there? Look at me - sense of humor, looks, body and an impressive spoon collection, I have it all, damn it. No wonder my little vixen couldn’t deny me.

The kind that comes out when something is so ridiculous your body doesn't know how else to react. "Do you think I'm joking?" I asked, my voice rising slightly. "Do you think everything I just said out there meant nothing? That I just said all of that and you can just say two words and I'll... what? Just forget it?" "That's not what I think," Khiron replied calmly. "Then what exactly are you doing right now?" "I'm being serious." I laughed again, sarcastically now, with no warmth in it whatsoever. "You're serious," I repeated, like saying the words out loud might make them make more sense. They didn't.

What…a unique sense of humor. “What do you think though…Valeria of Silver Glow?”. One of the women asks. “Or shall I say…Valeria of Shadowflame?”. They chuckle like it’s so funny. I don't see the humor. “What do you think of our little company?”. I don't understand why they keep wanting to hear my opinion. I think a half of them are stuck up jerks while the other half are pretentious nitwits….but I mean…who cares.

" Ian frowned at the question. Ian (8:15 pm) : What kind stupid question are you asking? Irritating Twat (8:16 pm) : Don't know the answer? Ian (8:16 pm): No. Irritating Twat (8:17 pm) : Because it is made out of cells! Haha! Ian gaped at the message for a long time before a small laugh escaped his mouth. The joke was really lame but it was funny.

She said that and I started dying on the floor, that was probably the funniest thing I've ever heard. "That is the fucking stoner spectrum!! Either you're a fucking Einstein or a fucking retard that tried to play baseball with a robot," I said, laughing through my words, causing Alex to break too, laughing and pointing out how fucked up my sense of humor is, "It's not my fault! Imagine having a fucked up humor before going through the dungeons of hell to become an arch-demon." "Tha-That's fair but still, that's fucked!" "Fuck me, that was funny," I said and the look I got from Alex scared the fuck outta me, she looked hungry but also cautious, "You good?"