Dark Humor Jokes No Limits Novels & Stories

When the world ends, Lilly James awakens. After a cataclysmic event fractures Earth and shatters the veil between realms, Lilly a seemingly ordinary woman who discovers she is the last tether holding the balance between divine order and infernal chaos. Hunted by celestial beings and demonic lords alike, Lilly is thrust into a war that has raged for eons in secret and now exposed and burning across the remains of the world. Caught in the eye of this divine storm are four men, two gods and two demons, sworn enemies from rival factions, each drawn to Lilly for reasons that go beyond destiny.     •    Kael, a fallen war god with a rage that could burn empires, hides a tortured honor behind his blade.     •    Theron, a stoic god of time and decay, holds the secrets to the apocalypse—and to Lilly’s past.     •    Riven, a charming demon prince of desire, masks deadly ambition with silken words and stolen touches.     •    Draven, a shadow-born demon of vengeance, silent and cold…except when he’s near her. Each of them needs her. Each of them wants her. But their desires might tear her and the world apart. As ancient prophecies unravel and her own powers begin to awaken, Lilly must navigate a brutal new reality where love could be her salvation or the catalyst for humanity’s final ruin. The gods demand devotion. The demons crave possession. But Lilly? She was never meant to bow. She was meant to rise.

When two people are in love, they get married! Lillian marries Mark,they try to fight strong but can the marriage continue? What happens when the doctor tells her plight?

My roommate beamed with pride as she told me a horrifying secret: she had allowed a wealthy businessman to "remove" her unborn child, claiming he absorbed the baby’s fortune in exchange for a hefty payout. Chills ran down my spine. I urged her to stop meddling with such dark dealings before it destroyed her, but she wouldn’t listen. Instead, she threw herself into it, addicted to helping people "transfer luck" for money. Her luck ran out when she contracted a mysterious disease. When her boyfriend found out, she turned on me, tearfully accusing me of tying her to another man’s bed. Before I could even defend myself, an enraged man ran me down with his car. The next thing I knew, I woke up to find myself back in time. My roommate was leaning in close, her eyes glinting with excitement as she whispered, asking if I wanted to join her "luck transfer" schemes. This time, I wasn’t taking any chances. I noticed the slight swell of her belly and immediately sent a text to her boyfriend: "Congrats! You’re going to be a dad!"

Dear reader, you have been warned. This isn't your regular romance... In fact, it's not romance at all. These are unapologetic stories of pleasure, lust, power and obsession. These men and women will infiltrate your thoughts, your mind and your body, and they will do so without your permission. Every word is spoken out of sinful desire, and every action will leave you dripping from your core, ready to burst. Are you ready to go down this rabbit hole where the line between lust and moral is drawn? If you are not, then leave while you still can, but if you are, then go ahead and turn the pages, be ready to have your darkest desires dug out and explored. .... Trigger warnings! BDSM LGBTQ content. DOMINANT AND SUBMISSIVE. TABOO/STEP SIBLINGS AND STEP PARENTS. STALKING AND KIDNAPPING. EXPLICIT SEX SCENES.

Read With Holy Water, A Priest, And Your Ancestors On Speed Dial from chapter 40..🔞‼️⚠️ ~~~~~ Rhydian’s fingers curled deep inside me, his eyes locked on mine. “You’re going to cum for me, Little Wolf. Whether you want to or not.” Tavian’s cock pressed against my lips. “Open.” He growled. “Now.” “They’ll hear you.” Astarian warned, his mouth trailing fire down my spine even as his fingers joined Rhydian’s. “You’re ours.” All three of them said it like a verdict. ~~~~~ Twenty years ago, three Alpha Kings slaughtered my entire Omega clan—My parents were not left out, including my twin pup. But the Moon Goddess had other plans. She cursed their unborn sons, binding all three to a single fated mate they must claim before their twentieth birthday. Or die. I am that mate. And I came here for blood. Rhydian rejected me the moment the bond surfaced. Yet his hands keep finding their way back to my body. Tavian thinks he is seducing me. He has no idea I am the one holding the strings. Astarian offers a tenderness so genuine it terrifies me more than either of them. I am the last son of Kaida, leader of the slaughtered Omega clan. I can shapeshift, bend any will, and bring three Alpha heirs to their knees without lifting a blade. My revenge was perfectly planned. Until the mate bond turned it into something I never prepared for. Because the closer I get to destroying their fathers, the harder it becomes to protect my heart from their sons. And intimacy, I am learning, is the sharpest weapon of all. ~~~~~ ⚠️Explicit MM content. Dark revenge themes. Depiction of violent scenes and blood. Three heirs who will ruin your standards. And an Omega who will ruin them first.

“Our marriage is nothing but a signature on a contract” he said glaring at her. “Don’t flatter yourself too much, Romanov. I don’t want this marriage either, however, if it would benefit my family; then I would sign the bloody paper” she said glaring back at him. ******************** He was a ruthless Russian Pakhan, and she was an English Don’s daughter, and their marriage was the ONLY way to ensure peace between the two rivaling families.

copyright (Warning this is a dark God and Goddess novel. This is all war and manipulation. It won't be pretty at times and it may make your cringe but every scene has a purpose. You just have to keep reading to find out more) Mazaya(masaya) is the goddess of wisdom and creation she's anything but normal. she's emotionally unstable because She holds too much power. She's the only God that was born with a dark god and light God parent. It was never heard of before her. So that explains why she is the most powerful God in existence. Right? Not really because nothing is as it seems. Gods are manipulating each other left and right to prevent complete control. Things you think you know turn out to be a spell caused to protect the world. The only truth is the what they are living now. The past could be lies and there's only one way to find out the truth, to go along Mazaya's journey. One thing is true though She only has one weakness and when the most powerful Gods find it out they work to exploit it so they can control everything. The person who possesses her rules all. Will Mazaya be a pawn in this war against Gods or will she be able to free herself from some of the most ruthless Gods in existence. It' starts off slow but once you get into it it heats up and gets intense. nothing is as it seems in a world full of the most powerful gods. There will be sex scenes and at times it will seem out of there but this is a world of Dark Gods not weak mortals. And what is the way to ones soul? sex and manipulation.

When Sanaya Johnson joined ReefWood Inc. as the CEO, Lancelin Eustein’s Personal Secretary, little did she know that her life was about to change forever. As a Scribt, a human with knowledge of the immortal world, she had to constantly balance her two worlds while keeping the immortal world a secret from her near and dear ones. But trouble arises when Lancelin himself takes an interest in Sanaya, a liking that threatens to shatter her hold on reality. Lancelin has lived for centuries amongst humans but no one has ever tempted him as his little Secretary does without even trying. He is determined to win her over at any cost, just to get a taste of the forbidden fruit. But Sanaya has had her heart broken once and she finds it near impossible to trust another man, especially an Incubus who is to be the future Incubus King. But just when the two of them start to fall for each other, the past comes to haunt them in the most unexpected of ways. And with Lancelin’s coronation on the way, will he be able to keep Sanaya by his side when the entire world wants to tear them apart?

I was sitting in City Hall, about to sign that damn mate bond certificate with Logan—Alpha of the Eastside Moonclaws—when his phone buzzed. One glance. Then he stood up like this was all just another errand. Didn’t even flinch when he said: “Something came up. Let’s push the bond signing to another day, yeah?” And just like that, he was gone. Left me sitting alone, surrounded by bonded pairs, all glowing with that sickly sweet “forever” vibe. Why? Because Emma, his darling little childhood packmate, twisted her ankle during pack-speed training—trying to keep up with the advanced wolves when she barely passed the basic shifts. Ten minutes later, I get a text: “Emma’s injury’s kinda serious. I gotta stay with her. Let’s move the wedding, okay?” Just another time—maybe the last—Logan picked her over me. But this time? No tears. No begging. No rage. The clerk gave me a quiet look, like she already knew how the story ended. “Ma’am... do you still want to proceed?” I pulled out my phone.Didn’t wait for him to change his mind. The clerk gave me that soft, pitying look. “Ma’am... do you still want to proceed?” I shook my head, and dialed home. The moment my Beta sister picked up. “Tell Alpha Dad I’m coming back to the Ridge. Today.” A pause. “You sure?” “Yeah,” I said, standing up, my voice steady. “I’m done here.” And just like that, I walked out. Not just from the building—but from him.

When the gas cooker exploded and Sharon Milton was close to death, only her five-year-old son, James Collins, was at her side. Her spirit stood next to James and looked at him as he sobbed and called Sean Collins. He begged Sean to come home and save his mommy. However, Sean only scolded him and told him not to lie like Sharon before hanging up. James wiped the tears from his eyes and called 911. When the ambulance finally arrived, Sean appeared and stept in. "Daddy, Mommy is bleeding out and needs the ambulance. Please don't take it from her!" "You little liar. Looks like your mom hasn't taught you very well. Step aside! Riley is due. She needs this ambulance more than Sharon!" James's eyes had turned red due to all the crying, but Sean pushed him away and left without even taking a look back. He got into the ambulance with Riley in his arms. "Daddy... Daddy! Please save Mommy!" James sobbed as he chased after the ambulance, but he didn't see the speeding truck that was heading towards him. Sharon shouted her son's name and wanted to push him away, but there was nothing she could do. She could only watch as James was run over by the truck. Beneath the wheels, there was a pool of blood spreading across the ground. Sharon was about to lose her mind. Over the past years, Sean had abandoned Sharon and James countless times for Riley Winston and her daughter. Whenever Sharon and Sean had an argument about this matter, Sean would always just say that he was repaying Riley's father for saving his life. Sharon just felt that Sean didn't know what he was doing. What she didn't expect was that he didn't care about her and James's lives at all. Sharon felt that she was the one who killed James. Her heart ached as she took her last breath. If there was another life, she just wished that she had nothing to do with Sean.