Funny Dark Jokes

“Tell me you hate me,” Mikhail whispered, aggressively pressing the side of my face against his expensive wooden table. I inhaled sharply, fighting back the moan in my throat. “I…” I wanted to force the words out, because I did. I hated him with every fiber of my being, with every drop of the blood in my veins. At the same time, I didn't. I had never put a label on the other thing I felt for him. He would never feel the same, and he would scorn me. “Say it, Marlowe. Say you hate me.” He dared, thrusting hard into me and stealing my breath. “Oh my God,” I cried out, pushing my ass backwards to meet his thrusts despite myself. “You can't say it, can you?” He laughed scornfully. “I… hate you.” I managed, inhaling sharply. He tugged my hair, fucking me harder. “No, you don't.” I couldn't argue, because an earth shattering orgasm snuck up on me and blinded my thoughts. When I recovered, I realized he was not completely wrong. *** *** *** Marlowe had a simple, happy life up until her late teens when she was about to go to college. Her father was murdered in cold blood and her mother fell apart. She was left to take care of herself and her mother, and all her dreams were shattered. She is kidnapped and sold to someone she once knew and was in love with. Mikhail Romanov. He is an entirely different person now. But Marlowe is an angel and she can melt the hardest of hearts. They fall in love with each other, but with this romance comes a revelation of secrets that shatter Marlowe and all that's left of her is a woman that is filled with hatred and anger, and desperate for revenge.

One mate is a blessing, two are a curse, I've learned it all the hard way. My life was as perfect as a life could be. Never notice it until I've lost it all. I'm an alpha line that also has a loving, carrying high-ranking mate. Not to mention that I'm always praised for how I look. I was what every she-wolf dreamed to be. Well, all of that changed when a stranger visited our pack. My entire world froze when I spotted his seraphic eyes. I felt the same pull I've always felt toward my mate. yet, a bit stronger. A stranger who is no one but the Alpha King himself. My entire idyllic world fell apart as I wasn't able to decide. Should I give a chance to the new pull I'm feeling for the alpha king, or to stay loyal to the one who's always been by my side.

Lena thought she escaped the nightmare of her car accident, but Cassian has other plans. He stalks her every move, appearing in the mirrors, his whispers consuming her mind. The lines between fear and desire blur as his touch ignites something dark and uncontrollable inside her. He’s not just haunting her—he’s claiming her. Every encounter draws her deeper into his twisted world, where pleasure and pain collide. The question isn’t if she can escape, but if she even wants to. As the boundaries of her body and soul erode, Lena finds herself unable to resist his overwhelming pull.

Maya Rivers came to Eldridge Falls to disappear — to bury herself in routine, classes, and the quiet anonymity of the library stacks. But secrets don’t stay buried here. Not in the same town where her best friend Lena has already learned how quickly desire can ignite in the shadows. For Maya, it begins as a late-night confession whispered into the glow of her phone. A fantasy shared with a stranger. Harmless, she thought—until the fantasy steps out of the screen and into the library aisles. Now every night draws her deeper into a game of secrets and proximity, where rules are written in whispers and broken with a touch. The man in the shadows knows too much, appears too often, and echoes words she thought no one else could read. As Maya wrestles with temptation, danger, and the thrill of being noticed, her story begins to intertwine with Lena’s. In Eldridge Falls, boundaries blur, shadows stretch long, and desire has a way of pulling you past the lines you swore you’d never cross. Some secrets keep you safe. Others demand to be lived.

Mariana, a sweet bookshop owner in busy Mexico City, catches the eye of Amir, a dangerous mobster. Amir follows her everywhere, stirring up emotions that push her to the edge. In her simple life, Mariana becomes Amir's obsession. His strong feelings haunt her as he watches her every move from the shadows. Amir’s surprise visits awaken a powerful attraction, pulling her deeper into his world. Caught in a web of passion and danger, Mariana must face a man whose desires threaten to change her life forever.

It all started with Selene, a broken omega, and turned into something no one could have imagined. What began as a fight for control between five Ruthless Alphas has turned into something else. They are no longer just trying to claim her; they're going deeper, and it's making things complicated. But Malachi, a lost King, saw something else — a past life, a forgotten bond, and that she was rightfully his, not theirs. This changes everything. The truths they've kept hidden start to be uncovered, causing trouble in their lives. They start to lose their control, and now everything is at stake—her life, their secrets, and who she truly belongs to. But can she survive it all—or will Malachi’s claim destroy them and her in the process?

Lily lives in a refugee camp with her mother and father. One day, her father is approached by some men offering him work. He takes up the offer in the hope to provide for his family, but Lily never sees him again. Soon later, her mother is shot dead escaping some rapists in the woods. With both of her parents gone, Lily is left to fend for herself, dragged into the heartbreaking, brutal world of human trafficking, when she comes across a man named Lazarus Landucci.

Velia Argento has lived a sheltered life, fiercely protected by her older brother, Hardin. But when she unknowingly saves the life of Xavier De Santos—Venom, the Alpha and head of the notorious MC The Reapers—her quiet world shatters. Ruthless, powerful, and driven by vengeance, Venom warns her: "You should have let me die." Now, he won’t stop until he owns her, body and soul. Venom is a shifter forged in blood and betrayal, haunted by the brutal murder of his family. He has spent years hunting those responsible, and Dr. Antonio Argento is the key to unlocking his past. When he discovers Velia’s connection to the doctor, she becomes more than a distraction—she becomes his obsession. Trapped in his dangerous world, Velia is forced into servitude, her every move dictated by his unyielding commands. But as she fights to escape his grasp, Venom finds himself drawn to her innocence, her defiance, and the fire in her eyes. He wants to break her—but what happens when the fragile kitten begins to claw back? With enemies closing in, secrets unraveling, and a war brewing among the most powerful mafia clans, Velia and Venom are caught in a deadly game of power, control, and undeniable attraction. She was supposed to be his prisoner. Now, she might be his only salvation. 🔥 **Possessive Anti-Hero** 💀 **Dark Mafia Romance** 🔥 **Obsession & Revenge** 💀 **Spicy & Emotional**

"I am a monster, Miss Hart. You wouldn't want nor wish to see me..." He is mysterious and brilliant, wealthy and prominent, but no single soul has seen him in person. Well, no one should see him—that's one of his many rules. No one can touch him either; that's another rule. Except for me because I have broken every rule. Now I'm extremely drawn to him. His peculiarity is out of this world, and his beauty is beyond physical. But the Master has demons of his own and is being chased by his brutal past. Suddenly, we've become the reflection of each other's nightmares. I realize that the Master and I are not so different. Is this newly found bond just another uncertain fate that could deepen our wounds, or is it finally going to be our redemption?

DARK ROMANCE: A reckless dare reunites her with a handsome, daunting man, forging a love of discipline and passion. *** SHE WAS POWERLESS AGAINST HIS ULTIMATUM BECAUSE SHE WAS STUCK BETWEEN THE DEVIL AND THE DEEP BLUE SEA-BETWEEN HIM AND THE LAST DARE GAME WHICH HE KNEW NOTHING ABOUT SHE PLAYED IT BECAUSE OF HER RECKLESS BEHAVIOUR- HER FIRE OF REBELLION HE IS DETERMINED TO EXTINGUISH THAT FIRE AFTER HER CARELESS MOVE ON HIM TO QUENCH A FIRE, YOU HAD TO BE SOMEWHAT CLOSE, HENCE HIS DECISION TO MARRY HER- AND HE WASN'T ASKING "You have until the end of today to give me a positive response or I will get you to marry me in the Mafia way." She gasped and her eyes were like saucers. "Mafia?" "I told you that you never really knew me. I was on my own when you came looking for trouble. Tonight, Elizabeth." SYNOPSIS: A dark game forces Zee, a reckless young woman into contacting the guy who took her virginity and begging him to marry her, but she neither expected his acceptance which keeps her in the game, nor his Mafia life as well as the tough love she is forced to receive at his hands.