Funny Inappropriate Bible Verses Novels & Stories

Do gods blush? I could have quite easily left them to it, sharing stories of the sheer stupidity and selfishness of people. I could have quite easily joined in and put their stories to shame. But none of that would help get me out of here in one piece. It would have been fun, though. Imagine how much of a better read the Bible would be if it was subtitled: People Are Unbelievable Idiots. “Is that why you wanted to die?” I asked. “To get away from your responsibilities?”

Did I even want to pray? As I continued to stare at Jesus' image, I felt another tear fall down my cheek. That tear was followed by another and another, and soon an entire sea of tears were trickling down my face. I stopped kneeling and sat on the wooden pew, my face in my hands. I sat there and sobbed, thinking that I shouldn't have even been in the church. I didn't belong there. God didn't want gays in his world. Lev. 20:13, "If there is a man who lies with a male as those who lie with a woman, both of them have committed a detestable act; they shall surely be put to death. Their bloodguiltness is upon them." I was surprised that a giant hand of God didn't come down and zap me right then.

She said then turned around and flipped her hair. ***** 1 Samuel 2:3 “Boast no more so very proudly, Do not let arrogance come out of your mouth; For the Lord is a God of knowledge, And with Him actions are weighed.